Page 11 | About my behaviour in A&E?

MissMissive · 23/04/2023 17:57

Quveas · 23/04/2023 17:05

This is MN. So it's perfectly acceptable to park in disabled bays because you want / need to and disabled people really don't need to park in them anyway because most of the people with blue badges are frauds, scream foul abuse at people, and then blame everybody else for your poor standards of behaviour. Meanwhile, out in the real world... I am surprised the doctor didn't show you both the door. NHS staff have enough to do without pandering to adults who don't know how to behave. Or park.

Haha, brilliant.

WomblingTree86 · 23/04/2023 17:58

MissMissive · 23/04/2023 17:54

And if there was a disabled person in an emergency situation then they could have just double parked / blocked the OP in. This was life or death. Not popping into Sainsburys for a ready meal.

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Quite.

BabbleBee · 23/04/2023 17:58

I don’t think you can expect yourself to be reasonable in that situation!

I called the person who caused a car accident and trapping my dad in his car a fucking wanker to his face - he told the police who were at the scene and I got told off! He told me to apologise and I refused….

JohnnyYenSetHimselfOnFireAgain · 23/04/2023 17:59

PetulaDark · 23/04/2023 17:48

“Not all” disabled people. So “some” is ok?

Heres a tip. If your child is actually dying, you call an ambulance. They have life saving equipment on board so they can be treated more quickly than if you drive them to hospital. And you are not likely to crash your car while you try and keep them alive.

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Your total lack of basic comprehension is frightening.

Twiglets1 · 23/04/2023 18:00

You shouldn’t have sworn at him but I probably would have done the same in the circumstances. And parked in the disabled bay if I was fearful for my child’s life.

ReadersD1gest · 23/04/2023 18:00

BabbleBee · 23/04/2023 17:58

I don’t think you can expect yourself to be reasonable in that situation!

I called the person who caused a car accident and trapping my dad in his car a fucking wanker to his face - he told the police who were at the scene and I got told off! He told me to apologise and I refused….

How is that comparable to op's situation?

I'm sure acting like a mouthy fishwife didn't help much in yours, either 🤷🏻‍♀️

hennaoj · 23/04/2023 18:01

PetulaDark · 23/04/2023 15:49

YABU, always, to park in a disabled bay. It’s a hospital so OBVIOUSLY there will be a lot of disabled people coming for appointments. Maybe someone had to miss their appointment or was seriously inconvenienced because they couldn’t park near enough or get their wheelchair out of their car.

I know you were in a difficult and scary situation but it just doesn’t excuse it. Did you consider that there might have been a disabled person in a similar situation to you who also needed the space?

It would be incredibly unlikely that would happen at the exact same time. I'm sure a child having a immediate threat to life is more important than someone with a blue badge missing an appointment! Of course the op wouldn't consider that, she wouldn't even have time to think about that!

Two of my children have a blue badge, someone else's child that could be about to die without instant medical treatment is certainly in need a space more than me.

Beetrootlover82 · 23/04/2023 18:01

I remember when I was in a&e with my toddler

I was so anxious and stressed.

Fellow parents also waiting who were arguing and sweeting each other along similar lines to this…. Just made a tense environment even worse

Beetrootlover82 · 23/04/2023 18:02

So know I wouldn’t have lost my rag

not for his sake

but for the other highly anxious parents present and poorly children

Strawberrydelight78 · 23/04/2023 18:02

She said it was a two minute drive away.
You could have a few hours wait for an ambulance.
It would have taken them longer just to get through to the ambulance service than the short drive there. As well as putting pressure on the ambulance service and the elderly who have had a fall possibly injured having to wait even longer.

AGovernmentOfLawsAndNotMen · 23/04/2023 18:02

PetulaDark · 23/04/2023 17:48

“Not all” disabled people. So “some” is ok?

Heres a tip. If your child is actually dying, you call an ambulance. They have life saving equipment on board so they can be treated more quickly than if you drive them to hospital. And you are not likely to crash your car while you try and keep them alive.

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OP hasn’t told us how near she is to a hospital.
Given my location I’d jump in a car as it would be quicker.
The disabled parking in the 3 hospitals that surround us is all near the entrances, for visitors as well as A& E.
So no I would have no problem putting my child ahead of someone visiting their relative in hospital.
Very few people are in a life and death situation that arrive in their own vehicle so the 20plus places for disabled parking near A& E are not all going to be taken up with disabled life and death arrivals.

Of course your hospital may be different.
My parents has plenty of parking for both near A& E, so obviously one would chose the non blue badge in that case.
Ours doesn’t.

Id rather do all I could to save my child’s life.

Spiderboy · 23/04/2023 18:03

PetulaDark · 23/04/2023 17:48

“Not all” disabled people. So “some” is ok?

Heres a tip. If your child is actually dying, you call an ambulance. They have life saving equipment on board so they can be treated more quickly than if you drive them to hospital. And you are not likely to crash your car while you try and keep them alive.

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My child quickly started to struggle with their breathing and was rapidly deteriorating before my eyes. I called 999 immediately and was told he was in the highest priority category but an ambulance would be 2 hours and we should do our best to get him there ourselves. This was 2 months ago. An ambulance isn’t a guarantee

AGovernmentOfLawsAndNotMen · 23/04/2023 18:05

hennaoj · 23/04/2023 18:01

It would be incredibly unlikely that would happen at the exact same time. I'm sure a child having a immediate threat to life is more important than someone with a blue badge missing an appointment! Of course the op wouldn't consider that, she wouldn't even have time to think about that!

Two of my children have a blue badge, someone else's child that could be about to die without instant medical treatment is certainly in need a space more than me.

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If a life is saved at the cost of someone missing or being late to an appointment or inconvenienced then I’m fine with that.
Id like to think most people would be too.
It’s called compassion.

misssunshine4040 · 23/04/2023 18:05

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 23/04/2023 15:26

So this morning my DD (9) out of nowhere had an anaphylactic shock. I have no idea what from, she has no allergies. But suddenly she was struggling to breathe and came out in hives in about 2 minutes. So I threw her and DS into the car and drove the 2 minutes to the hospital. DH is abroad for work so I am on my own! I parked in a disabled bay because they’re closest to the hospital and this was an emergency.

Went into A&E, there were 2 desks and one of them had a family there - a teenage girl (the patient from what I overheard) and her mum and dad. I went to the other desk and the doctors came out straight away to get DD. I could hear the dad of the other family moaning about the 2 hour waiting time. DD was struggling to breath inbetween cries of pain because of the hives.

Anyway they gave DD medication straight away and she was very quickly stabilised. However they initially wanted to observe her for a few hours - and are now observing her overnight just in case and will be running tests tomorrow to find out what on Earth she’s reacted to as she did/consumed nothing new this morning, or if it’s possibly immune system related. As you can imagine I was absolutely shitting myself whilst also trying to be a calming force for her, and her brother who was upset at his big sister being so unwell.

Anyway once she was stabilised and under observation, they said she needed spare clothes as they’d removed hers in case it was her clothing 🤷‍♀️ I just happened to have some in the car and thought I really needed to go and re park it anyway

anyway this was maybe an hour after turning up and the family I saw on my way in were still waiting. You have to leave A&E via the reception. The teenage girl patient was flicking through her phone and in no obvious distress. The dad looked at me and loudly said “For fucks sake we were before her and she’s leaving before we’re even seen”.

I just saw red and told him to get fucked I thought my daughter was dying before carrying on to the car to shouts of “you can’t speak to me like that”. He was watching me as I moved the car too as the A&E looks out directly into the car park so saw I’d parked in disabled without a blue badge.

Anyway he complained about me and the doctor told me off about using foul language in A&E and parking in disabled bays without a blue badge I said I’m sorry if it’s made their job more difficult but I’m not sorry for what I said. And that the non-disabled spaces are ages away and to me it was an emergency which is why I parked there. But this bloke was kicking off in reception at this point and taking time up so they obviously weren’t thrilled with me.

But IABU to have behaved the way I did?

DD is fine now BTW and happily watching TV in the children’s ward with my mum next to her, I’m in the canteen going silently between abject worry and total mortification!

No you were fine. Why was he not told off for swearing?
Ridiculous. Don't worry about it, you absolutely did the right thing parking in the disabled bay aka the closest space to rush your daughter in.
I hope she recovers well

Blamunge · 23/04/2023 18:06

PetulaDark · 23/04/2023 17:48

“Not all” disabled people. So “some” is ok?

Heres a tip. If your child is actually dying, you call an ambulance. They have life saving equipment on board so they can be treated more quickly than if you drive them to hospital. And you are not likely to crash your car while you try and keep them alive.

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Honestly if my child was dying I wouldn’t care what problems other people had. My child’s life comes before everything and everyone else. You’re mad if you think anyone would put a stranger before their own child.

BookishCook · 23/04/2023 18:09

AngeloMysterioso · 23/04/2023 16:51

The dad looked at me and loudly said “For fucks sake we were before her and she’s leaving before we’re even seen”.

I just saw red and told him to get fucked I thought my daughter was dying before carrying on to the car to shouts of “you can’t speak to me like that”.

By the sounds of things he was complaining, but not actually speaking to you. So YABU for that.

And by taking a disabled space you were depriving an actual disabled person of a space who could have needed equally if not more urgent access to A&E. So YABU for that as well.

There's literally nothing more urgent than anaphylaxis, especially once that airway closes.

Original poster

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 23/04/2023 18:10

yeahscience · 23/04/2023 16:12

Missing the point of the thread, but you really should have called an ambulance.

Anaphylactic shock is a life threatening emergency. Paramedics would have deployed medication at the scene and monitored her on the way to hospital. What would you have done if her airway swelled so much she stopped breathing whilst in the car.

If you had taken the appropriate action than the whole situation in A&E and with parking would have been avoided.

I really can’t gamble on an ambulance being available when we live round the corner from the hospital.

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WimbyAce · 23/04/2023 18:10

I don't blame you for where you parked. If it was my daughter and I thought it was a life or death situation I would park in the nearest space possible. I actually think the arrangements for A&E are ridiculous when you are think you are only there really if it was an emergency situation, the last thing you want to be doing is fannying around trying to park. I would also have probably answered the guy back as it would have annoyed me too, maybe not said f yourself though!

summerpoolandsun · 23/04/2023 18:13

It was a tense environment. The guy was being a wanker and you reacted. It’s not your fault BUT you should have let it go for your own sake. Not worth feeling mortified after…

joelmillersbackpack · 23/04/2023 18:13

You did nothing wrong OP. I wouldn’t gamble on an ambulance either. If you’d have posted about waiting an hour for an ambulance, you’d have had people saying you should have driven there yourself.

You maybe shouldn’t have sworn but if people talk shit they should expect to get shot down. Good for you.

Xavier234 · 23/04/2023 18:14

Nah, you were fine. I hate people parking in disabled spaces but what could you do? Also A&E is based on emergencies etc. Dying person is clearly a prio. It's the receptionists/security staff etc I feel sorry for, they must get so much abuse. I was at A&E earlier this year & seen first despite huge queue but luckily everyone in waiting room who had been waiting ages was dead nice (probably because of the blood and agonising screams lol).

GeneHuntsCowboyBoots · 23/04/2023 18:18

Definitely not BU. Obviously it’s not ideal behaviour with the swearing but FGS, your child was life threateningly ill and the adrenaline will have still been flying its way round your body. I’d have probably been the same. And as for the disabled space, again, you did what you had to do.

My son had croup as a toddler and had a really noisy stridor (I think it’s called). I shouted/screeched so loudly at the nurses to hurry up because I honestly thought he was going to die (never having experienced this before). I mean yes, I didn’t swear but my behaviour wasn’t the best either but it was because I was absolutely petrified. I apologised (and thanked them) once things had calmed down and they were lovely.

Slitheringheights · 23/04/2023 18:19

MissMaple82 · Today 15:35
You're a nob who behaved very badly! Hospitals actually have drop off points for emergencies just like this, which you're allowed to park in for a limited time so you should have done this! And you stooped very low by swearing. I'd be embarrassed if I were y

im more embarrassed by your stupid comment to tell you the truth

May09Bump · 23/04/2023 18:21

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

You obviously haven't experienced anaphylactic shock - seconds can mean life or death. Emergency drop off points are often blocked by other vehicles and occasionally Ambulances. My child has gone through this and I would of parked my car anywhere to get to a Dr. You've also just called someone a nob - so calling saying the OP stooped low by swearing is a bit of a laugh.

OP - you were probably on a adrenaline rush and Mr Mouth should have kept his thoughts to himself - give yourself a break. I would have also parked anywhere - I wouldn't be burying my child because I looking for the correct bay.

Original poster

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 23/04/2023 18:23

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 23/04/2023 16:36

DD is fine now

Have you even wondered how their child or emergency ended up? You sound incredibly selfish. But glad your child is OK.

Yes, you followed your instincts and it was probably quicker than an ambulance, but you have no right to be foul-mouthed to another worried parent. And you are definitely unreasonable for parking in a disabled bay!!! Why are you so entitled?

Because my DD couldn’t breath so yes I did feel entitled to park as close to the hospital doors as I possibly could.

OP posts: