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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think other children's snacks are irresponsible?

359 replies

cowgirljoey · 19/04/2023 18:18

The official policy at DS's school (Year 2) is for them to bring a fruit or veg snack from home for break time. This seemed to be what happened when DS was in reception and Year 1, but over time DS tells me that his friends are regularly bringing crisps, chocolate bars and sweets in for their snack(s) and that he is one of the only ones who has fruit/veg each time.

Totally get that this needs fact-checking (I have a few reasons to think is is accurate), but if it is AIBU to think this is something I should contact school about? I don't think it's fair on the kids to be having junk food as a snack, and I've observed myself that lots of them eat barely any of their school lunch, suggesting that they aren't v. hungry at this point (understandable if they've had choc/crisps an hour beforehand). I think that parent are being irresponsible to be giving chocolate as a daily morning snack, but as I have no control over this, AIBU to think that school should be enforcing the fruit/veg policy?

OP posts:
DumpedByText · 19/04/2023 18:35

Why do you care, you do you and let the other parents get on with it!

HighInfidelity · 19/04/2023 18:35

I can’t imagine a packet of crisps is enough to stop a child being hungry enough for lunch. A pack of crisps from a multipack is only about 130 calories. How are you observing that lots of children aren’t eating their lunches?

NeatCompactSleeper · 19/04/2023 18:36

Thanks for your reply. What if it was another school rule being broken?

It's not though and if you can think of any that are, it's probably best to post a separate thread.

ETref · 19/04/2023 18:36

cowgirljoey · 19/04/2023 18:30

Do we not have a responsibility as members of the same community to promote healthy eating habits? What justification is there for giving a morning snack of chocolate and crisps every day? Especially given the childhood obesity crisis in this country.

We have a responsibility to get involved if we suspect that a child is being abused or neglected. But when it comes to someone else's kid eating a bag of crisps you need to keep your nose out.

Custardbanana · 19/04/2023 18:37

Your DS is very clever trying to get you to give him crisps and chocolate.

EstieGreenwood · 19/04/2023 18:37

ABSOLUTELY none of your business what snacks other parents send with their kids.

bellac11 · 19/04/2023 18:37

cowgirljoey · 19/04/2023 18:30

Do we not have a responsibility as members of the same community to promote healthy eating habits? What justification is there for giving a morning snack of chocolate and crisps every day? Especially given the childhood obesity crisis in this country.

Who are you reporting smokers to by the way?

AlwaysFishnets · 19/04/2023 18:37

cowgirljoey · 19/04/2023 18:30

Do we not have a responsibility as members of the same community to promote healthy eating habits? What justification is there for giving a morning snack of chocolate and crisps every day? Especially given the childhood obesity crisis in this country.

I agree that the school needs to enforce this.

way too much obesity seen in children - parents need to be her accountable.

there is a very very broken attitude towards food in this country!

Gymrabbit · 19/04/2023 18:37

It is frustrating when you are following rules and others aren’t.
my kids school had a rule about dark coats. So we dutifully bought black coats that the children didn’t like and other coats for out of school. Then all the kids started coming in in random colours.
The school quietly dropped the dark coat policy…..

Original poster
cowgirljoey · 19/04/2023 18:38

Custardbanana · 19/04/2023 18:37

Your DS is very clever trying to get you to give him crisps and chocolate.

Indeed!😂

OP posts:
Broadbeachshallow · 19/04/2023 18:38

YANBU. Contact the school. The policy should be followed and enforced. Crisps and chocolate for morning snack are not better than nothing.

Skybluepinky · 19/04/2023 18:38

Unless u want to b known as “that parent “ don’t contact the school.

Bumdealoftheweek · 19/04/2023 18:39

You'll get a short thrift on here but I agree with you. If it is a policy it should be adhered to otherwise don't have it. There wouldn't be the same attitude if it was a behaviour or SEN policy. Fundamentally, policy is what holds schools to account so if they say they're going to do it, they should do it otherwise every policy becomes diluted with a pick and choose attitude.

You'll also get told to mind your own business but that's half the problem. Obesity and childhood obesity are a huge societal problem which we all have a responsibility for. It impacts on an individual level but it is society that foots the bill. A chocolate bar and packet of crisps every day is not teaching good nutritional habits. It's totally unnecessary. I don't see why it is wrong to point that out?

TeenLifeMum · 19/04/2023 18:39

Our school was really strict on this rule… then would sell donuts every Friday and ice creams in the summer term every night! That used to make me roll my eyes. Love the freedom secondary school brings. (But also don’t understand reception dc needing a packet of crisps at break).

GoodVibesHere · 19/04/2023 18:39

So you'd ring the school to say

'Hello, I'm a mum ringing to let you know that some children seem to be eating crisps and chocolate, could you do something please, I'm very worried for them'

Give me a break! This can't be real!

Housen · 19/04/2023 18:40

cowgirljoey · 19/04/2023 18:30

Do we not have a responsibility as members of the same community to promote healthy eating habits? What justification is there for giving a morning snack of chocolate and crisps every day? Especially given the childhood obesity crisis in this country.

Do we not have a responsibility as members of the same community to promote healthy eating habits

NO !!! It’s literally none of your business what other people or their children eat.

DrMarciaFieldstone · 19/04/2023 18:40

But you think it’s irresponsible to give children chocolate as a morning snack anyway, so presumably even if it’s fine for everyone to bring in what they want, you wouldn’t let your DC join in with chocolate anyway, so what are you hoping to achieve? To push your beliefs on everyone else and convert them? Keep polishing your halo and sending your kid in with fruit and veg.

shutthewindownow · 19/04/2023 18:40

You arnt the headteacher so you do t get to decide I'm afraid

Theunamedcat · 19/04/2023 18:40

Ds school did this I send in mini cheddars because his dentist wants him to stop eating so many apples a day they are fine with this as he is a poor eater anyway

There is nothing wrong with a small packet of crisps

readbooksdrinktea · 19/04/2023 18:40

GoodVibesHere · 19/04/2023 18:39

So you'd ring the school to say

'Hello, I'm a mum ringing to let you know that some children seem to be eating crisps and chocolate, could you do something please, I'm very worried for them'

Give me a break! This can't be real!

It probably is though, that's the sad bit.

Original poster
cowgirljoey · 19/04/2023 18:41

GoodVibesHere · 19/04/2023 18:39

So you'd ring the school to say

'Hello, I'm a mum ringing to let you know that some children seem to be eating crisps and chocolate, could you do something please, I'm very worried for them'

Give me a break! This can't be real!

Not the approach I was thinking of. I would ask for clarity on the policy, as I want to check if my DS comments are accurate, and if they are, whether we need to follow the policy or not.

OP posts:
LadyMonicaBaddingham · 19/04/2023 18:41

FlyingCherries · 19/04/2023 18:22

IMO this is almost certainly massively exaggerated by your DS. He’ll have seen one child with a Kit Kat once a week and another with a packet of crisps. Most of the kids will have fruit. But even if it was true, this is between the school and the other parents and absolutely none of your business.

Exactly this.

SouthLondonMum22 · 19/04/2023 18:41

Stay out of it.

How do you know that these children are the same children not eating their lunch? How do you know that it's daily?

It's really none of your business.

LivingNextDoorToNorma · 19/04/2023 18:42

cowgirljoey · 19/04/2023 18:34

Thanks for your reply. What if it was another school rule being broken? DS is confused because they know what the policy is (they all got told it when they started school) but DS sees no one following it except for them. I think this must be confusing for a child and makes me seem unfair by following the policy when others are ignoring it. I think it sends an odd message to the children about what rules mean.

I actually don’t think it’s a terrible thing to teach children that sometimes rules don’t make sense, and that it’s ok to challenge them. (In this case, does it make sense for those in authority to dictate what others eat? We certainly wouldn’t tolerate it from our employers).

I also think it’s a life lesson. I can see several houses on my street have their bins out (breaking the rules, they shouldn’t be out yet). Sometimes people follow the rules, and sometimes they don’t.

NeatCompactSleeper · 19/04/2023 18:42

I do love the thread title though.

I'm off to buy an irresponsible snack.

Anyone want one?

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