to not want my family to know how much I paid for my house?

[lightlyseasoned12938712]

Thanks to some good luck when I was younger, I have quite a lot of money saved up. But I've never made this obvious to people I know, partly because some of my family can be quite problematic when it comes to money. I really just don't want any of the attention that I know comes from wealth, so although I've never lied, I've also never done anything that would make my financial situation clear (car, clothes, travel, etc)

I don't think this is going to be possible any more - I've just bought my first house, and although it's not large, it was quite expensive due to the area. I'm happy for people to know I own a house (would prefer they didn't though), but I'd really really like people to think it was cheaper than was the case

Does anyone have any clever suggestions to hide or downplay this purchase? I'm dreading the questions and changes in attitude when I tell people otherwise!!

Don’t lie and say your renting. That’s mad. You can also look that up on Land Registry for a fee of £3.

Enjoy your house, decline to discuss your finances and tell your 'difficult' relative she does not have to visit or be in contact with you if she can't control her envy.

So you have a nasty unhinged relative? Well frankly I thing you do is going to help with her. Just go NC. West trouble would you suffer from the rest of them?

This. You can’t control access to freely-available information, so you need to focus on developing boundaries and methods of dealing with other people’s behaviour, and stop being so covert about your money, as though it’s some grubby little secret.

I agree. It sounds like these people are a negative influence and are holding you back. Could you stop seeing them?

They might know the price but don't know the level of your debt.
Just maintain that the bank owns most of it and that you hope you can keep up the repayments and are happy to be living there.
If people ask more information, tell them you'd prefer to keep it private.

They’ll be able to look it up on zoopla.

I’d start seeing you’re comments about how stretched you are, making it absolutely clear that all your money’s now tied up in this home!

*seeding your comments 🙄

Tell them you've got a really long mortgage?

My 28 year old colleague bought our her ex on the big house they night together by extending the mortgage period to 40 years, to reduce the monthly payments.

Or just tell them you worked hard and saved hard. Or that it's none of their business!

Wow, loads of replies and good advice, thanks! Sounds like what most people are saying is go for the large mortgage approach, and set some boundaries if they push more

One problem is that I don't have a mortgage - does that show up online? I don't really like lying, (but I'll do it if that's the best option)

For anyone who's been in a similar situation, can you give me some examples of what friends/relatives said? I'd like to be prepared!

@lightlypoached 😂 seriously considering this

@Thighdentitycrisis, @Hotvimto3 I like this attitude. But one problem is that while some of my relatives aren't very nice, some are lovely. But if the first lot dislike me enough, they'll cause problems with the nice ones- I've seen them do it to others

@daisymoonlightThis was a really nice thing to say thank you!

@IncompleteSenten Some of them will do this I think, but it's not a big problem, I'll just do what you said. It's the people who might damage my good relationships that have me thinking about this

@alwaysmovingforwards that's very wise!

@LincolnIsle That's a really interesting idea, thanks for sharing. But people will know my address, and even if the land registry record is in Welsh, the price and my name won't be?

It won't show online that you don't have a mortgage

Just what was paid for and when

So if asked - just say a huge mortgage /costly each month but one day you will own it

If you don't have a mortgage, Land Registry won't show that you have one.

Land Registry will show who bought the property and how much for, even if you don't have a mortgage.

Perhaps many people don't know that, so you may be ok just saying you've got a huge mortgage, unless one of these relatives points that out.

You have my sympathy; your relatives sound awful.

@Starseeking thanks, that's what I was thinking. Most people won't know that so if I'm just confident, it should be fine. Thanks, some of them are a bit difficult!

It's nobody's business how much you paid for your house.

@CremeEggThief , dh and I do, too. Nothing like a good old nose to see what so and so’s house sold for, especially if it was quite a bit less than the asking price, after they’d been telling you for two years that they absolutely could not take any less.

BTW, OP, if they’re nosy enough to look on the LandReg site, not just nethouseprices, they will be able to see whether there’s a mortgage, and if so, who was the provider. But not for how much.

Can i ask, how did you come by £600k?

Surely not savings as that's a huge amount

@lightlyseasoned12938712 If someone knows what they are looking for they can find out you don’t have a mortgage. Other posters are correct the info does not appear on websites. If your relative is really nosey they can buy a copy of the register and this will show there are no charges I.e. no mortgage.

I think you have to go with “I have been saving for years and really had to stretch myself to buy this house. Do you have any holidays booked? “

”I am very uncomfortable talking about money/my home please can we change the subject. How’s your mum/daughter been? “

Congratulations on owning your own home. It is a wonderful feeling but understand why you may want to keep how much it cost quiet.

One thing, do they all live in the same area? If not do they need to know that you've moved?

What is the worst that this woman can do? Will she think she's entitled to some of your money?

I don't think you can ever find out whether somebody has a mortgage or not. That's private.

Haha I bet you already know but this information is out there for anyone to check on the internet if they ‘d like
Don’t waste your energy.

by the way, best advise is Kermit to yourself.
I also hate nosy people, it’s not of their business how much he you paid, even less how.

I would laugh and say” it doesn’t matter, the important thing is that I am so happy and love my new place” and very fast change to a different subject, and Keep going non stop talking about the different subject, asking questions to the person non stop.

*keep it haha

@determinedtomakethiswork No, they live all over- but once one person knows, everyone will. My main concern isn't requests for money, its more spiteful behaviour, which I've seen from them before. I worry that, because this will come as a surprise to everyone, it will be framed as deceptive and secretive and that people I care about will then look at me differently/trust me less

@lookingforchangenowww thanks, lots of questions sounds like a good way to go

What an odd problem to have…..say you’re renting? Why do you care!?

There's two ways....say you rent it or
say it's rent with option to buy (if it's not obvious it doesn't fit whatever criteria that needs)