To secretly envy outdoorsy families

[Purplefoxes]

I envy outdoorsy families. They look like they have so much fun together and just make it all look so easy. Our family on the other hand, we are a bunch of wimpy townies!..DH does not like any sport (I've tried!) Or most activities which involve breaking a sweat, DS1 6YO is into gaming (not through my choice) and whines for screens regularly and DS2 is only 4 months old. We just went on a Easter break in Cornwall, got wetsuits and thought we'd give body boarding a go with DS1... 15 minutes in the shallows, 9 degree water and we were out again shivering and begging for hot chocolate, DH laughing on the beach with DS2 🤣 not quite what I envisaged but probably shouldn't be surprised given the weather and the temperatures! Should I give up and assume it's just not in us, we are just not hardy folk or should we keep trying, can we change? Love the idea of wild swimming, coastal and mountain walks, camping under the stars. But the reality of lashing rain, mud and sand in unmentionable places, endless washing, dodgy loos, whinging kids etc etc is holding me back. Wise mumsnetters, is there a trick to being more outdoorsy, how do you make it more bearable?

I think you’ve gone in pretty extreme! We enjoy a lot of activities outdoors but I’d ease yourself in gently especially if children aren’t used to it.

• walks with incentive - hide chocolate on the way round/ petrol (sweets) half way, clipboard and things to spot on the way round
• national trust/ English heritage sites that have lots of areas to explore and normally a park and cafe
• take scooter/ bikes to stop the kids whinging
• beach trips but avoid the water until it’s nice and warm 😂
• sausage sizzle on a camping stove
• walk to a pub for lunch
• be a bit more spontaneous like driving past a new park stop and explore

you don’t have to go full on can definitely find a balance somewhere in between

I think it's about the value of getting out in nature despite the barriers of bad weather. I wouldn't usually choose to go for a walk in the pouring rain but I don't want my kids to grow up thinking that mud and wind means they can't get outside.

We’re really outdoorsy, but I was raised that way. We were never inside. I now own a farm and we have horses, livestock, chickens, dogs, cats, etc. which necessitates being outside.

We sail, wild swim, wild camp, surf, paddleboard (more toddler friendly), cycle, run, etc.

All you need is a DryRobe, good flask and a bobble hat. And willing. Start in the summer, you’ll have a better chance of convincing the townies in your family.

I prefer being in the sea in the rain, weirdly. It feels so elemental.

I guess I just don't see anything intrinsically valuable about going outside in shit weather.

If you enjoy it, fantastic, but why not accept that some people don't enjoy it and would much rather stay at home?

You don't win any prizes because you've forced yourself out in shit weather 🤷‍♀️

I understand that not everyone enjoys being outdoors and that weather is a factor in this. My point really is that I believe that there are benefits to being outside in nature that you can't get anywhere else. But each to their own.

but why not accept that some people don't enjoy it and would much rather stay at home?

because as a parent of a 6 year old, you sometimes do know what’s best for them.

same with eating their veg despite them “much rather” preferring chocolate!

If you're anywhere near Hampshire I highly recommend theamblingpath.co.uk for circular walks with all the details about whether or not it's pushchair friendly/cafe/toilets en route etc. Fantastic lady I know created the site, it's also on FB and Instagram.

Of course children should be active, but they don't need to be dragged outside in all weathers for that to happen.

There are lots of ways to be active inside that don't involve coming home windswept and covered in mud.

Get a National Trust membership- we use ours a lot with our 4yo and 1yo. Check which places have extra child enticing things such as play areas or activity trails and as PPs have said, bring lots of snacks and a thermos- although NT places often have a decent cafe.

I don't disagree that being out in nature is beneficial, but surely you can just wait for a sunny day

There's nothing intrinsically wonderful about choosing to go out in shit weather.

Some people just aren’t outdoorsy.

We do a fair amount of bike rides and walks when the weather is nice, and go to our local national trust adventure playground… but I wouldn’t call us outdoorsy people at all. If it’s cold and rainy then it will always be an indoor activity like soft play or swimming or something.

I have friends who are just very naturally outdoorsy, do lots of camping holidays centred around hiking, brave all kinds of weathers and activities. They just love and thrive off it. I don’t.

I don’t think there’s anything superior about being that way and I won’t force myself to be miserable for the sake of ‘being outside’ life’s too short to be miserable.

Oh and we also recently bought a Little life ranger toddler carrier thing so we can still do family walks. We got the £120 from John Lewis- well we asked family to all chip in towards it for 1yo's first bday present and we bought the rain cover and just recently the sun shade. It's been really really good so far and we've had a lot of use from it. You can sometimes pick them up for 40-60£ on Facebook marketplace so worth keeping an eye out for when your youngest starts approaching 1.

Things I used to find went well was stuff like
Give them a camera to take photos on a walk
Use leaves and stones to make a 'picture' on the ground
Climb a small hill because its an achievement and the views are worth it
Paddle in rivers or waterfalls or fountains where safe to do so
Take sketch pads and go drawing (with non sporty but artistic dd)
Easy silly ball games on the beach
Rock pooling
They will actually just like time with you outdoors, it won't always be without tears or trauma but it will mean something and it will build their perseverance as adults.

Been outdoors is nice in good weather it’s not if it’s not !

Start with geocaching, great fun for all the family. We hike a lot and used caching as a way to get DD (then 6) walking more miles. It worked perfectly and now she's an outdoors teen working on her silver DofE.
Download the app, have a look on ebay/amazon/Google to get an idea of the sort of containers you'll be looking for, take a pen and tweezers to start off and away you go!

Would you be willing to say roughly what area of the country you’re in OP? People could give you recommendations for good outdoorsy places to go.

I'm outdoorsy, DH is absolutely not, total townie! So I take the kids out with me. I make sure we've got loads of snacks and are plenty warm enough and we usually have tea and cake or an ice cream when out which incentivises the kids. DH has started joing us because he misses us and knows I'll go without him regardless!

I got very depressed spending my weekends indoors, but it took me a while to figure it out.

I also swim in winter, but I've been called a bit crazy before!

I had assumed that outdoorsy families had loads of outdoorsy-specific kit that they use to make it bearable or fun.. which requires a lot of space and a bit of cash- also maybe they are at a higher base level of fitness due to all the outdoorsy jaunts so it’s just NBD to spontaneously hike off together for the afternoon?

I'm afraid I have to disagree!

But I'm very much from the "no such thing as bad weather" brigade.

Go on walks with other families..then the 6 year old and friend will run ahead hitting trees with sticks etc ...i think you were setting the bar wildly high expecting sea swimming from a child in winter !

I live by the sea and my children will only go in if its actually hot on the beach.

Also. We camp a lot. Kids run around being feral adults sit in chairs drinking.

Six is too young to be into gaming..no judgement i know how easy it is to slip into but you just need to really distract by being out of the house a lot

Amen to that - there's nothing enjoyable about trudging round the countryside in the pouring rain and wind!

Does anyone else hate being inside? I have a real issue with it and just wondered if anyone else is the same. I would be outside all day if I could.
DH jokes that I would rather live in a tent on a hill than in a mansion with no garden. I feel incredibly claustrophobic inside. I'd even rather be outside in the rain than inside.

Anyway as a result I'm always taking our 3 kids out, but I have to be sensible as they are young and get tired and grumpy. We tend to do long days at the park with picnic, football etc, go to national trust places or gardens, go to the beach (live near). We go on lots of 'adventures', so drive up to 50 minutes to somewhere new, some new woods, new beach, country park etc with a picnic. A cafe always helps encourage the kids!
I'm keen to start doing long cycles but we need a seat for the baby and bike racks.
So far we have avoided computers/tablets completely (eldest is nearly 7) so it makes going outside more appealing, but this year we are planning to get a switch so it might get trickier.

Does anyone else hate being inside?

Nope, I absolutely love being in my own home, surrounded by my own stuff.

I don't think how you feel is uncommon though, lots of people like being outside!

In terms of kit we have loads of camping stuff accumulated over time including lots second hand and bought in end of season sales. Walking boots and Wellies (second hand for the kids as they grow out of them quickly), a couple of coats each (winter coats and pac-a-mac type) also bought in sales. Picnic stuff like flasks, tupperware, basic small rucksacks/day bags. Small first aid kit, torches. And that's it really. The camping stuff takes up loads of room but everything else is pretty much day to day stuff.

I am very unfit but I'm more than capable putting up the tent, going for a walk and then lighting a campfire to toast marshmallows.