To secretly envy outdoorsy families

[Purplefoxes]

I envy outdoorsy families. They look like they have so much fun together and just make it all look so easy. Our family on the other hand, we are a bunch of wimpy townies!..DH does not like any sport (I've tried!) Or most activities which involve breaking a sweat, DS1 6YO is into gaming (not through my choice) and whines for screens regularly and DS2 is only 4 months old. We just went on a Easter break in Cornwall, got wetsuits and thought we'd give body boarding a go with DS1... 15 minutes in the shallows, 9 degree water and we were out again shivering and begging for hot chocolate, DH laughing on the beach with DS2 🤣 not quite what I envisaged but probably shouldn't be surprised given the weather and the temperatures! Should I give up and assume it's just not in us, we are just not hardy folk or should we keep trying, can we change? Love the idea of wild swimming, coastal and mountain walks, camping under the stars. But the reality of lashing rain, mud and sand in unmentionable places, endless washing, dodgy loos, whinging kids etc etc is holding me back. Wise mumsnetters, is there a trick to being more outdoorsy, how do you make it more bearable?

Doesn't bother me!

Are you sure you it's not just that you feel you ought to?

All my friends are outdoorsy, walking dogs in the rain, running forest schools - there's no such thing as bad weather just poor clothing. Fuck that. I'm happy at home, pottering around. I go out when I need to. I'm a fair weather camper, duvet, glass of wine. I'm a fair weather anything. I'll hike miles, if there is a pub, a roast a glass of wine at the end of it. Both boys play sports, Both x box. I'm happy at home watching a box set. Why? Just why? go out in the pissing rain?

We saw other people enjoying the sea and so I thought we can do this...erm turns out no! I've heard of but don't know anything about geocaching...will have to do some research thanks for the tip!

I have a trick. I have a suggestion. wait for better weather. Don't do it in the pissing rain of April 23.

DH is a kayaking instructor in his spare time.

We are going camping for the first May bank holiday weekend - which we have done in previous years.

He would avoid putting beginners in the water even that weekend as even if it's warm the sea will likely still be cold. He will go in and DS and I might brave it for half a hour or so.

But realistically even then he wouldn't risk DS getting too cold.

He's organising some sessions for scouts ATM and the conversation has been between him and the other leader who is doing it that May is too early and cold. June to September is really the time to get into it unless you are really into it and have the right gear.

He will go kayaking in December but he will be in thermals and a dry suit not a wetsuit...

Body boarding for the first time at this time of year, when water is normally still quite cold even if the weather is quite warm seems a bit like jumping into the deep end in terms of trying to be more outdoorsy.

Being outdoorsy doesn't have to mean sports and extreme outdoor hobbies. What about walking, or nature trails, picnics etc. There are plenty of ideas online in terms of nature activities to do with kids.

I’d say we’re in the middle somewhere. Live in a village so do lots of walks, trips to parks/outdoor spaces BUT categorically not when it’s raining. We all detest the rain. See also extreme mud, wet sand etc.

The idea of the sea in the U.K. in April makes me want to hide under my duvet!

I envy them but that’s because I’m an outdoors sort of person without the funds to actually go outdoors! Furthest we stray is the country park 30 mins from us on foot.

There's a wide margin between being generally outdoorsy and enjoying bodyboarding in April lol.

Just walk. Find some nice places, beach or Countryside and plan a nice route. Pub lunch at the end as a reward.

We love camping but only because dh is a proper capable, outdoorsy boy scout type, making fires, fishing etc...not sure I'd even get the tent up if it was down to me. If you're nervous of camping, go glamping instead. There's a couple of really nice places in the Lake District we've been and glamping is far easier/less faff and mess than camping.

I totally get this. I’m a bit outdoorsy in the summer. If it’s a nice day! Family bike ride?

Take friends. If they have friends there, they will enjoy carping about outdoors. If you can make friends with an outdoorsy family where you get on with the adults and the kids get on, that's even better.

We have found doing things like camping and walking so much better going with others.

I think you are being kind with 'brave'. Foolhardy is the truth! Kudos to the others doing it though and staying out for so much longer, hardened surfers I guess.. I like your bribery angle, take 100/500/100 steps for a snack. Always said I would never bribe my kids but I have ended up doing it anyway of course.

My kids enjoyed https://www.treasuretrails.co.uk/ and even when teens we would use them occasionally. Made getting outdoors even in towns and cities good fun.

15 minutes anywhere near the sea at the moment sounds pretty hardcore to me.

Your key is making the experience more comfortable - that means clothing, footwear, equipment, catering and transport.

There's no joy to be found in mild hypothermia, soggy socks and shoes blistering until you're squelching in your own blood, especially if it's then another hour and a half before you have to wait for a bus and three before you are anywhere near food and a coffee. But there can be utter joy in getting blustered about with your feet comfortable, dry and supported, in suitable clothing where you are not drenched in cold sweat or rain but are at a good temperature, and then rest at the top with a hot drink and snack before returning to another coffee and whatever is your equivalent to a hot bacon roll and an easy trip back.

I'm not a fan of carrying tons of things - travelling light is important, as it can sap too much of your energy if you're lugging around IKEA bags of tut (DP was retrained and now focuses upon what will go into a pack and nothing else). But equally, refusing to carry an extra, light, layer so you end up cold for hours is a really bad idea.

We're a very outdoorsy family and also live in Wales. You have to not mind getting wet and cold! My favourite weather is torrential rain, I love it. And my husband is Norwegian so spends British winters in shorts and t-shirts telling us how wimpy we are! He swims in the sea this time of year but I wouldn't without a very good wetsuit.

As pp have said start smaller - but also don't force something that doesn't come naturally just because you feel you should. Some people are just homebodies and that's ok too! Takes all sorts.

I'm a year round open water swimmer, but wasn't when the DC were young. To be honest, dragging children into a 9C sea is not a good idea, even with wetsuits on.

My dc loved geocaching when small. They also loved going for walk if you could make it into a treasure hunt with a prize at the end (chocolate). You can give them each a sheet with things to tick off (daffodil, blossom, squirrel, cow pat etc).

What we didn't do is drag them out regardless of weather. I know some people swear by the idea of "no such thing as bad weather if you've got the right clothes" but I didn't want to put them off.

Totally agree with you re the gaming. By that I mean supermario on a Wii and Lego game on a tablet. We got a kindle fire to keep him entertained on plane and it was a slippery slope. Plus they have a nintendo switch at his after school club which was the real problem. These things are addictive! This is exactly why I'd like us to do more activities together, no staring at screens (I say as I type staring at a screen) 🙄

What classes as outdoorsy? We go for nearby woodland walks at the weekend but there is usually a hot drink involved and no more than 4 miles. We take the kids for a beach holiday once or twice a year and they swim in the sea in wetsuits. We camp for a few days each year. So you might look at me and think Outdoorsy when really I am quite lazy and indoorsy.

We're an outdoorsy family and my kids are in the sea all year round to surf. But with full winter gear including winter wetsuit, gloves, boots and hoods! You'll put them off for life putting them in the sea at this time of year.

Baby steps! My kids both did a lot of forest school when they were small. In all weathers. So they've gradually got used to it.

Have you considered geocaching?
I have never done it myself but have friends who love doing it with their kids. The treasure hunt element keeps them engaged better than just going for a walk or ride apparently.

Foolhardy is definitely the word.

There is a genuine risk of hypothermia if you aren't careful and push your luck with small kids at this time of year. (Believe me I've had DH go on about this a lot).

You need to know what you are doing and yes, hot chocolate etc handy if DS was doing it in April/May. And straight out of he started shivering a lot.

You need to know what you are doing if you body body, surf or kayak out of season and understand when / how hypothermia happens.

Pat yourself on the back for knowing when to quit rather than saying you wish you could have stuck it out.

My kids are townies. To be fair we don’t live somewhere that is naturally outdoorsy. They’re 13 and 14 and one will usually screech about being dragged to another country park or for a walk.

I’d start small. Country parks with play equipment, a short walk, biking, a farm.

@Movinghouseatlast Since realised ours are summer 3mm and also cheapy ones 😳 not even the right gear and still no idea!! Do they really make a big difference to comfort or is it a case you have to build up tolerance or both?

@ChiChaNaYubi Would like to do bike riding and DS can ride a bike...however I think DS2 is too young for a seat at 4months. We didn't get a seat for DS 1 he just had a balance bike when he was 3 ish from memory. Where's a good place to get advice on bike seats these days, Halfords? Would need to get a car rack too! It starts to get expensive 😬

Lead by example.

You say your DH wont get into sport but what about you? Eg running: if your kids see you going for a run a couple of times a week then that means running becomes the norm to them and completely attainable. Then see if you get lure them into something like park run or a fun charity run.

(Easier said than done though I know!!)

"DS1 6YO is into gaming (not through my choice)"

I hate to tell you this... but YOU are the parent, and it's entirely up to you what activities a 6 year old partakes in!

We are an "outdoorsy" and "active" family. The kids do like "gaming", but can only be on screens if they have done sufficient other activities. 1 hour of sport = 1 hour of screen time.

Just borrow someone's dog and take it for a walk. Look for local walks. Go on a family bike ride (trailer for the little on). Chase each other round the park. Go swimming together. Paint rocks and go and hide them. Play Pokémon Go on your phone so you have to walk and catch Pokémon etc...