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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think a grown woman....

405 replies

ToTheMax0 · 11/04/2023 22:28

Should be able to know how to operate a dishwasher?
New colleague didn't know how to do it. She stacked it correctly but was then standing around looking stumped. I had to intervene and help.
She is 41!

OP posts:
Bernardo1 · 13/04/2023 21:24

Yes you are, she'd done everything.
All you needed to do, was show her the on button!

Justgorgeous · 13/04/2023 21:27

Wow. You are really mean.

Craig32935 · 13/04/2023 21:58

Are you a man like me, because that sure sounds like something a man would ask. Maybe she grew up in a home (like I did {M62}) where such magical devices did not yet exist. I had to learn how to use my first dishwasher later in life. As for putting the dishes in properly, hello? It is designed to make sense on first look, kinda like Ikea assembly instructions.

It was the same for my first experience with a microwave oven.

Lastly, there is no way that you automatically knew how to use a dishwasher the first time without being shown or reading the instruction. At best, you took an uneducated guess and got lucky.

Instead of coming here to complain, you should have instead just been a decent, helpful, non-condescending human being.

Wishawisha · 13/04/2023 22:03

Dishwashers, washing machines etc I can generally figure out easily. Other people’s ovens however - no chance.

DH and I have just found out that we put our own oven on completely different settings as standard and we don’t know who is right. At least we can both function it though which is more than can be said for the last one in a holiday home.

Middleagedspreadisreal · 13/04/2023 22:15

I've got one but don't know how to use it, it's my husband's domain. I'm older than 41. Is there anything she can do that you can't I wonder? And would she be as judgemental and horrified as you are?

tinkerbelldot · 13/04/2023 22:19

I don’t know how to use a microwave, last time I looked in the mirror I was definitely a grown-up…57 😁

eastegg · 13/04/2023 22:20

How do you feel the thread’s going OP?

Kelljo83 · 13/04/2023 22:22

Jeez! How privileged do you sound!! If you've never had a dishwasher, how would you know how to use one? I wouldn't that's for sure

NeverTrustAPoliceman · 13/04/2023 22:26

I'm in the Never Used A Dishwasher club too.

Early 60s, highly qualified, own business which includes using some complicated equipment. But no experience of dishwashers.

PleaseJustText · 13/04/2023 22:47

Yeah I'm 35 and have never used a dishwasher. Never had a kitchen big enough for one 🤷🏻‍♀️

SillyOldBucket · 13/04/2023 23:16

YABU.why would someone who has never used a dishwasher before know how to operate one without the instruction booklet?

Flandango · 13/04/2023 23:18

My butler always switched on my dishwasher for me. I'd be lost without him

SpudsandGravy · 13/04/2023 23:19

She mustn't have one at home, so hasn't needed to learn how to use them. I didn't have one until I was aged almost 50. Even now I don't have a microwave, and find them very confusing at work for heating up my soup. I don't have a clothes drying machine either. Could be she knows how to do things that you wouldn't know how to do. We're all different.

DobbleBobble · 13/04/2023 23:29

You should make sure operating dishwashers gets added to all job descriptions from now on.

notacooldad · 13/04/2023 23:37

She mustn't have one at home, so hasn't needed to learn how to use them.
I have one at home but the one we have at work is completely different ( it’s a domestic version not an industry spec one)

chibsortig · 13/04/2023 23:42

I once had to Google how to operate my neighbours washing machine as she asked me if I'd run the load of towels she left in it. I had used my own machine no bother yet hers baffled me completely.
Ive never used a dishwasher so would have no idea how to make it work. I wouldn't say that makes me any less intelligent.

Marshmallowkisses · 14/04/2023 00:00

I've never owned a dishwasher. I'd rather wash dishes myself. I wouldn't know where to start

Mamanyt · 14/04/2023 00:22

There are a LOT of people who have never operated a dish washer. And for many different reasons. I don't find that unusual, or at least not that odd.

Let me give you one that's REALLY unreasonable. I was, many years ago, visiting at the home of a friend. We got thirsty, and this young woman said to me, "We'll have to go out for drinks. It's the maid's day off, and all of the glasses are dirty." Not only could she not run the dishwasher, she had no clue about how to handwash dishes. And this woman had just graduated from Uni here in the USA Summa Cum Laude. Lots of smarts, no common sense.

Mammyloveswine · 14/04/2023 00:26

ToTheMax0 · 11/04/2023 22:28

Should be able to know how to operate a dishwasher?
New colleague didn't know how to do it. She stacked it correctly but was then standing around looking stumped. I had to intervene and help.
She is 41!

I don't have a dishwasher! Never have had one! I can use the ancient one at work but wouldn't have a clue with others! Think you are being mean,

Skodacool · 14/04/2023 00:40

Bao · 11/04/2023 22:30

Sounds like you're being a bit of a dick.

I agree; we weren’t born knowing how to use a dishwasher

Skodacool · 14/04/2023 00:44

Presumably OP you would also expect a grown man to know how to use a dishwasher

Furries · 14/04/2023 00:53

Rubio2014Dublin · 13/04/2023 18:25

I understand your position entirely! In days gone by, I quite possibly wouldn't have hidden my surprise or the fact that I thought she was some kind of idiot. However, after living a little bit more now, I try never to make assumptions or belittle anybody (even to myself) because I've encountered the most beautiful people who weren't as fortunate as I have been, some who grew up in the care system and had to literally figure out all basic life skills and daily living practices without any support or direction from an elder person! When I heard their history, I was heartbroken and also in complete awe of them for making it so far when plenty of others would use it as their reason for never taking accountability or responsibility for any mistakes they made OR try to learn from said mistakes, instead they are quite satisfied to sit back and assume that someone else will fix it while they are thinking of some other way to use this to add to their story where they are ALWAYS the victim and the wronged person who always suffer from the unfairness of the world!
This is just one possibility for her lack of life skills, there's numerous things that she has gone through that would explain why she struggles with things that we may assume are the norm. I'd suggest that you try and befriend her- who knows- it could be the start of the best friendship you've ever had!

I’m pretty sure this is sarcastic/joking. But the way MN is at times, there are many occasions where I’m really not sure!

Furries · 14/04/2023 00:55

Am wondering if the OP was started by the person who “boasts” of making shit up on MN. I’m sure I’ve seen something referenced on here before - someone on Twitter (or something) that boasts about coming in here, setting off a thread, and then just watching it unfold.

TheKobayashiMaru · 14/04/2023 04:49

Furries · 14/04/2023 00:55

Am wondering if the OP was started by the person who “boasts” of making shit up on MN. I’m sure I’ve seen something referenced on here before - someone on Twitter (or something) that boasts about coming in here, setting off a thread, and then just watching it unfold.

There's been a few of these recently. Goady OP and then never replies again.

knittingaddict · 14/04/2023 04:54

Furries · 14/04/2023 00:55

Am wondering if the OP was started by the person who “boasts” of making shit up on MN. I’m sure I’ve seen something referenced on here before - someone on Twitter (or something) that boasts about coming in here, setting off a thread, and then just watching it unfold.

😁There won't be just one person like that. My guesstimate would be 1 in 2 threads on here is pure fantasy.