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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think a grown woman....

405 replies

ToTheMax0 · 11/04/2023 22:28

Should be able to know how to operate a dishwasher?
New colleague didn't know how to do it. She stacked it correctly but was then standing around looking stumped. I had to intervene and help.
She is 41!

OP posts:
menopausalbloat · 13/04/2023 16:59

The OP farted this one out then left.
Rude.

purplebunny2012 · 13/04/2023 17:46

YABU. I have just got my first dishwasher in my new kitchen in my mid 40s. Never used one before this.
This is the 2nd thread I've seen on AIBU where its assumed absolutely everybody has or has used a dishwasher

katseyes7 · 13/04/2023 17:54

I've lived in three (rented) houses with dishwashers. I've never used one before.
I live on my own. I wash dishes in the kitchen sink.
None of the properties had an instruction manual for the dishwasher.
I've been afraid to use them in case something goes wrong and l flood the place.
I'm a grown woman. I'm 64. I've managed all my life without a dishwasher.

mel71 · 13/04/2023 18:00

My son (18) went to Spain with ten friends (male and female). They had a ten min heated discussion on whether the washing machine tablet/capsule went in the drawer or drum. He texted me to ask me in the end. 😂

SqueakyRadish · 13/04/2023 18:03

Weird flex OP, but you do you

Zax · 13/04/2023 18:04

@ToTheMax0 I bet you're a hoot to be around at parties.

Arniesleftleg · 13/04/2023 18:08

YABU. Not everyone has the luxury or even wants a dishwasher! I was almost 30 the first time I used one. Didn't have a clue till a colleague showed me how.

Babysharkdoodoodood · 13/04/2023 18:13

Never used a dishwasher in my life. That's what oh is for.

Allmyghosts · 13/04/2023 18:13

The only time I have used a dish washer was when covering the posh offshoot of a postnatal ward I was working on. I had no idea how to work it. Tbh they seem quite pointless, ex inlaws used to wash everything then put in the dishwasher, very logical Hmm

Longleggedgiraffe · 13/04/2023 18:14

I use my dishwasher a lot. But it took me some time to work out what was what. It's hardly worth ev3n thinking abou, let alone worrying over.

stacyvaron · 13/04/2023 18:15

I have always lived in very small spaces, and have never had a dishwasher. I can probably figure it out, but I would be with the group that just stood staring

Tomorrowillbeachicken · 13/04/2023 18:19

I hadn’t one until I was in my thirties so would not have a clue before then

Butchyrestingface · 13/04/2023 18:20

I would have to learn how to use either a dishwasher or a tumble dryer. A dishwasher haven't had since I was a child and a tumble dryer I've never had.

Rubio2014Dublin · 13/04/2023 18:25

I understand your position entirely! In days gone by, I quite possibly wouldn't have hidden my surprise or the fact that I thought she was some kind of idiot. However, after living a little bit more now, I try never to make assumptions or belittle anybody (even to myself) because I've encountered the most beautiful people who weren't as fortunate as I have been, some who grew up in the care system and had to literally figure out all basic life skills and daily living practices without any support or direction from an elder person! When I heard their history, I was heartbroken and also in complete awe of them for making it so far when plenty of others would use it as their reason for never taking accountability or responsibility for any mistakes they made OR try to learn from said mistakes, instead they are quite satisfied to sit back and assume that someone else will fix it while they are thinking of some other way to use this to add to their story where they are ALWAYS the victim and the wronged person who always suffer from the unfairness of the world!
This is just one possibility for her lack of life skills, there's numerous things that she has gone through that would explain why she struggles with things that we may assume are the norm. I'd suggest that you try and befriend her- who knows- it could be the start of the best friendship you've ever had!

Theyoungestone · 13/04/2023 18:26

Seems to me that you haven't got much to worry about in your life - lucky you!
As others have said - maybe she hadn't used one before!
Also, the fact that she's new means that she's probably feeling nervous anyway and there's you slagging her off for this? I can just imagine you tutting and eye rolling about her to other colleagues.
Get a life and stop being a bully.

Ted27 · 13/04/2023 18:27

when I returned to the office after 15 months working at home I had forgotton how to use the printer/copier.

when I was 40 I went travelling for 6 months, got a temp job in a supermarket and was completely stumped by some of the fruit and veg, I remember one customer looking at me like I was an idiot because I didnt recognise a pepper.

MaryShelley1818 · 13/04/2023 18:27

I'm 44...never used a dishwasher before as never needed to. Hardly a lack of life skills!

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 13/04/2023 18:28

OMG I hope they revoke her Woman Card. Whatever next - not being able to bake a lemon drizzle?!

Chocolatepumpkin · 13/04/2023 18:28

Was she solely hired for her dishwasher knowledge?

I couldn't operate one without being shown i will live with this shame weighing me down from this day forward. Op you sound like a judgy dick in all honesty i bet you rolled your eyes too.

MummyBee40 · 13/04/2023 18:29

YABU. I have never owned, nor used, a dishwasher so I wouldn't know how to work one either.

Instead of judging, why not use it as an opportunity to teach? After all, I'm sure people had to teach you how to do things you didn't know how to do. I'm also certain that there's plenty of things you still don't know how to do and won't until someone else passes on that knowledge.

Theyoungestone · 13/04/2023 18:31

😂Love it 808kate1

Ted27 · 13/04/2023 18:31

@Rubio2014Dublin

Im not sure that operating a dishwasher is a ‘life skill’, nor is someone deprived if they don’t have one.
Its a bit of a leap to think care system
in fact, my son is adopted with siblings in residential care. When we went to see his brother in his new home at Christmas, they had a brand new kitchen, twice the size of mine, with every gadget you could wish for.

Scorpio75kaz · 13/04/2023 18:33

I wouldn’t have a clue how to work a dishwasher cos I’ve never had one!

TheTruthWillSetYouFreeMaybe · 13/04/2023 18:37

I’m older than this. I have never had or used a dishwasher - my kitchen is tiny and space at a premium. Sure I can load one - and have - but that’s as far as I go. Should I feel shame ?

Messyhair321 · 13/04/2023 18:45

I'm 55 & never had a dishwasher. It took me about 20 minutes & the intervention of DD too help me work ones on holiday