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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Unisex public toilets

130 replies

Stickyfloors · 10/04/2023 20:31

I don’t really understand why these are becoming popular.

I don’t have any issues with members of the LGBTQ community using whichever toilet they feel comfortable in but I generally don’t want to use a toilet that a bunch of men have pissed all over the loo seat, toilet, floor etc.

I went out for the day at the weekend and have walked out of multiple toilets that were so foul I wouldn’t use them. Some has loo seats showered with urine, others had such soggy floors that I thought the bottoms of my trousers would be one soaked in urine if I used them. I also pushed open the (unlocked) cubicle in one toilet to find a man sat on the loo… revolting and, I’d imagine, quite frightening if I’d been a young girl trying to use the toilet.

My children love eating in Five Guys bad ask to go each school holiday as a treat. I’ve told them I’m never going again because of the unisex toilets.

AIBU?

OP posts:
BounceyB · 10/04/2023 20:33

Yes. Get over it.

BCBird · 10/04/2023 20:34

If there is only one toilet I don't mind it being unisex but if there is more than one I expect there to be one for women only

Original poster
Stickyfloors · 10/04/2023 20:37

BounceyB · 10/04/2023 20:33

Yes. Get over it.

Wow, I wondered how long it would be before someone came along with a bitchy reply! First comment, that’s a record for me!

Please let me know how you’d overcome the ick? Does the uncleanliness not bother you, you you not mind doing a full on clean before you use the loo, is your bladder stronger than mine and you don’t need to use public looks or something else?

OP posts:
Londongal123 · 10/04/2023 20:37

I love unisex toilets. These have been a blessing for my son who has long hair and constantly being told he’s in the wrong toilet. My cousins daughter has short hair and it’s the same. People always telling her she’s in the wrong toilet.

I think most young girls have dads so in the case of an accidental peek (like how often would that happen really?) they are likely not to be as traumatised as you think.

DOBARDAN · 10/04/2023 20:38

I find these types of toilets problematic on so many levels, as do most women I've spoken to. Okay, have unisex, but there should always be provision of single sex facilities so everyone is catered for and privacy/safety is taken into account.

Lovetotravel123 · 10/04/2023 20:38

Totally agree with you. I just want to sit down on a clean, dry, loo seat.

Londongal123 · 10/04/2023 20:39

Stickyfloors · 10/04/2023 20:37

Wow, I wondered how long it would be before someone came along with a bitchy reply! First comment, that’s a record for me!

Please let me know how you’d overcome the ick? Does the uncleanliness not bother you, you you not mind doing a full on clean before you use the loo, is your bladder stronger than mine and you don’t need to use public looks or something else?

Show quote history

All the unisex toilets I’ve been in have been clean. So the ick is a facility issue not a unisex issue. Don’t make this into something it’s not.

Albiboba · 10/04/2023 20:39

I don’t really understand why these are becoming popular

I don’t really understand why they’ve become such an issue.

Some of the most disgusting toilets I’ve been to were women’s.
I’ve never found unisex toilets less clean than single sex public toilets.

Topsyturveymam · 10/04/2023 20:40

YANBU.
I only pee in unisex toilets if I’m desperate. I’ve had to hover over a pee covered seat and step in god knows what, on most occasions when I’ve had to use one. Yuck.

gogohmm · 10/04/2023 20:41

I can't get worked up about provision for small locations like a fast food restaurant or coffee shop where there's just a few individual cubicles. Shopping centres for instance need to have provision for different needs.

dietcokelime · 10/04/2023 20:42

I hate unisex toilets with a passion! Disgusting and I don't want to share that sort of space with men.

Some women's toilets can be gross, but every single unisex ones I've seen are gross!

Lockheart · 10/04/2023 20:43

I went out for the day at the weekend and have walked out of multiple toilets that were so foul I wouldn’t use them.

When I go out for the day I never have a problem finding a toilet that is a) clean and b) single sex.

Although as a former cleaner in my experience men and women's toilets are equally horrible or nice depending on the clientele...

SnowyPetals · 10/04/2023 20:44

I don't mind if it's individual cubicles including the basin, ie you don't really come into contact with anyone else. I don't think men necessarily leave toilets in a worse state than women - I've come across some pretty revolting women's loos. But I don't like mixed gender toilets with a shared handwashing/preening area.

Original poster
Stickyfloors · 10/04/2023 20:47

dietcokelime · 10/04/2023 20:42

I hate unisex toilets with a passion! Disgusting and I don't want to share that sort of space with men.

Some women's toilets can be gross, but every single unisex ones I've seen are gross!

I agree. I have a very week bladder and have to use the toilet a lot when out (yes, I have some medical issues causing this and, yes, I have sought medical advice).

Of course you get revolting ladies only toilets and you also get immaculate unisex ones. Most men use the toilet differently from women, there is splashing and spraying.

my estimate would be that 80% of ladies toilets are in a reasonable starlet when I come to use them and that only 10% of unisex toilets are.

it’s just revolting and I don’t want to use unisex public toilets.

OP posts:
Bimbleberries · 10/04/2023 21:00

Yes, they're horrible, and I agree, often more likely to be smelly and messy and wet.

I also dislike the new trend in buildings to label the rooms as 'cubicles' and 'cubicles and urinals'. For a start, there are no symbols any more, or easy to read words for people who might not speak English or have good literacy. But also, it doesn't clarify anything - they must still mean women and men, and most people interpret it like that. They aren't suggesting everyone can just use either one - they're just appeasing people who are using their own sex toilets but don't want to actually be labelled women or men. (Presumably. I guess there is the possibility that some people might also choose to use the opposite sex ones because they can now). But it's annoying, as you have to find the rooms, which aren't always next to each other, and if you find one labelled cubicles, you don't know if there is necessarily another one available or not etc.

SunshineGeorgie · 10/04/2023 21:03

Never had a problem with any unisex toilets! Ever

Simonjt · 10/04/2023 21:08

Londongal123 · 10/04/2023 20:39

All the unisex toilets I’ve been in have been clean. So the ick is a facility issue not a unisex issue. Don’t make this into something it’s not.

Show quote history

The only dirty ones I have encountered is the one at work (I’m the only man in our office) and one in our local Costa. All others have been clean and haven’t smelled etc, they also tend to be a bit roomier, so handy when you’ve got the kids with you.

Whatdidisay · 10/04/2023 21:25

I hate them from a safety point of view, my 11 yo daughter is gaining a bit of independence now and I have no issues when out if she pops in to the women's on her own, yet there is no way id allow her to use unisex loos without me accompanying her!

WifeMotherWorker · 10/04/2023 21:34

I agree with you. All the women I know want safe single spaces like toilets.

Toseland · 10/04/2023 21:40

This reply has been deleted

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Chillyallday · 10/04/2023 21:40

I completely agree… unisex toilets are absolutely disgusting 🤢 and I do everything I can to avoid them. Vast majority of women I know want female only toilets.

DustyLee123 · 10/04/2023 21:43

I don’t like sharing. Men’s wee smells much worse than women’s, and they tend to piss all over the seat.

StormiDayz · 10/04/2023 21:49

I don't mind as long as it's enclosed with the sink and floor to ceiling door. I've never seen a man in one using the facilities with the door open and I find how dirty or clean a toilet is, is irrelevant to whether it's female only or unisex. I've been in some filthy female only toilets and some very clean unisex toilets.

fruitypancake · 10/04/2023 21:53

Agree.. I hate unisex toilets for all the reasons you mention. Gross and unsafe

UsingChangeofName · 10/04/2023 22:40

Londongal123 · 10/04/2023 20:37

I love unisex toilets. These have been a blessing for my son who has long hair and constantly being told he’s in the wrong toilet. My cousins daughter has short hair and it’s the same. People always telling her she’s in the wrong toilet.

I think most young girls have dads so in the case of an accidental peek (like how often would that happen really?) they are likely not to be as traumatised as you think.

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