Is my husband right to be embarrassed when I serve soup for lunch to guests

[MusicLass]

This is a bit of a long-running joke in our house, but underpinned by genuine feelings…

i like making soups from scratch (E.g vegetable, lentil, minestrone) and try to make them tasty, nutritious and filling. For some visitors I make soups for lunch or dinner, for the same reasons above, plus I can make them in advance and just reheat giving me more time to be attentive to guests. I also either bake or buy nice bread and butter to go with the soup. Something for pudding would be offered too.

DH gets embarrassed when I serve soup to guests, saying it’s not proper food and it’s not being hospitable. He would expect a pasta or rice dish round someone’s house, or meat.

He happily eats soup when it’s just us as a family.

AIBU to serve soup to guests? Or is he right? Generally he is more sensitive about social etiquette than me. He’s also from a Mediterranean culture, which could be a factor here.

Thanks for reading and helping us to settle this!

@Fairislefandango i don’t think op is a chef.

No, and I'm sure you don't think I was suggesting she was. The point I was making was that serving homemade soup does not necessarily suggest a lack of confidence in the kitchen. Confident cooks also make and serve soup.

My kids would hate it, I would love it. But like the others have said, yes for lunch, but not for dinner. But tbh I wouldn't say anything as I would be grateful someone else had gone to such effort.
It sounds lovely.

I would be delighted to have hearty, home made soup for lunch with French bread or rolls and something nice for pudding. I used to make gorgeous soup that was very filling.

Homemade soup is fine when having people round for lunch with nice bread. Then maybe a nice homemade cake. But not really for dinner.

Flashbacks of the Seinfeld episode where Jerry & Elaine can't decide if soup counts as a meal when you take someone out for lunch 🤔

@dew141 it sounds amazing! Years ago in a previous job we had a staff canteen with a brilliant chef. He would make a vat of homemade soup every morning and my absolute favourite was his white onion soup, so creamy and velvety. If mine is half as good I will be happy!

I don't think even the greediest guest would manage a whole goat head.

Hone made soup with home made bread is the type of lunch my friends normally get.

This week it was curried parsnip as the fridge was full of parsnips. On Weds they’ll be getting Turkish Lentil soup.

I think he just volunteered to cook for all guests from now on.

Lovely for a light lunch.
But if I was served soup for dinner, I'd take a small portion as I would be expecting a meat/fish course to follow.

For a lunch, a homemade soup, with bread would be lovely. But for a dinner I would be a bit "huh", and thinking about what I've got in the fridge at home.

Agree.
It's very ordinary, I have soup as a quick work lunch.
Bit dull to be served it if you went out for lunch and an absolute no no for dinner as the main.

Seems fine as an informal lunch when people are over, especially if home made and with nice bread.

Homemade soup and nice bread, followed by a pudding? I'd love this.

However, I'm not a big eater, and my favourite courses are starters and desserts, so I might not be the average dinner guest.

I especially like that people could have a smaller portion of soup or have seconds etc so they could eat the right amount to fill themselves up.

I think the majority of people would see soup + dessert as a lunch thing rather than a dinner thing, but I would happily disagree with them and consume their soup.

Lunch fine, dinner not

It more depends on the ingredients-I make a very hearty soup, using meat and/or pulses, so there’s a lot of protein, which is what keeps you feeling full- it’s a meal in a bowl. If you just use veg with no protein, then it’ll satisfy you for about 5 minutes

I don’t mind eating soup for lunch if it is only us but I don’t think is appropriate if you have invited someone for lunch unless you use it as a starter.

People tend to make more effort when inviting people in.

I once went to lunch at someone's house and was served cold pureed courgette with hot sauce, - I'd have killed for a nice bowl of soup.

I love a good soup, if it's filled with lentils and meat it's really filling. I'd have it with crusty bread and butter if it was just for me, maybe fancy it up a bit by adding cheese toasties for dipping if it was for guests.......I'm slipping into a.food coma just thinking about it. 😋

I like soup but it's the equivalent of being invited to brunch and offered cornflakes and toast

I think the Christina Aguilera thread got pulled.

Im with your DH and it’s cultural. When I was first invited to a lunch in UK I was very surprised how little food was offered, it’s functional rather than festive if it made sense. By the way I’m absolutely fine with it now.

I love making soups and often serve it to guests.
I usually serve soup (plenty) with nice bread, butter, lots of cold meat and cheese for a light lunch on a ordinary day with tea/coffee and desserts after but not for Sunday lunch or any other occasion.
I wouldn’t serve soup as a starter for an occasion dinner but sometimes for an ordinary dinner.

Soup for lunch is ok I suppose. But certainly not only soup for evening meal. As a firsr course fine them followed by a main course.

When having guests over the cook tends to miss out on all the chat. So I agree a nice soup is perfect and means you can enjoy your guests company aswell.
If your dh is so worried about it and he’s from a Mediterranean culture why doesn’t he make some mezzes or something to go after, if it’s an evening meal. For lunch it’s fine on its own.

He's not embarrassed enough to switch the oven on & host, then?

Just the exact amount of embarrassment to trigger him into criticising his wife, but not enough for him to menu plan, shop for, cook & serve the food himself?

He's using your visitors as an opportunity to undermine you.
Tell the entitled twat that the food's all up to him next time. And mean it.