Page 10 | Unexpectedly late lunch at friends house, wibu to expect to feed the kids some dinner?

Moreorlessmentallystable · 09/04/2023 16:51

I always have fruit, biscuits etc for the kids if people come over for a cuppa (all at kitchen table and they help themselves) if people overstay (happens often) but I wasn't prepared, I just pull some frozen pizzas or chips out of the freezer or make a quick pasta. As a guest I wouldn't expect it though and I would have just taken my kids back home for dinner. Sounds like it was a lot of you and maybe the guest didn't have enough food to feed 9 kids again? I wouldn't overthink it.

Moreorlessmentallystable · 09/04/2023 16:51

The host* not the guest! 😅

ShirleyPhallus · 09/04/2023 17:01

SpinCityBlues · 09/04/2023 15:24

I'm currently living on my own and I could pull a 'light tea' for 8 - 9 children out of my arse in minutes (assuming I wasn't utterly pissed).

Packet of cream crackers. Slab of cheese. Some sliced tomatoes. Toast x 8 or more slices. Jam & peanut butter. Bowl of crisps. <Stares at cupboard>. Bowl of sweetcorn. Tinned tuna and mayo. Melba toasts. Matzos.

Christ could you imagine the MN thread from a guest if you pulled that lot out

Moreorlessmentallystable · 09/04/2023 17:11

SquigglyGum · 09/04/2023 07:51

Did you read that we all contributed to food and booze?

There was no more adult food to eat by that stage. Except the leftover rice i did offer some of them.

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If all the food was gone, then you guys definitely did not have enough. You always have to aim for having a bit of leftover food... Next gathering you need to arrange everyone including the host to arrange more food. Including extra in case people overstay. I've never thrown a party where all the food is gone, so that was really poor planning with regards to amount AND timings.

ferntwist · 09/04/2023 17:13

YANBU. That was really a bit selfish of her. I’d have been so uncomfortable waiting until 4pm for lunch, never mind the kids expected to go without dinner. She could easily have rustled something up

DoingUp · 09/04/2023 17:17

This is terrible hosting! But one of the other adults probably should have popped to the shops to get something for the kids.

SpinCityBlues · 09/04/2023 20:57

ShirleyPhallus · 09/04/2023 17:01

Christ could you imagine the MN thread from a guest if you pulled that lot out

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There would be two camps, Shirley.

Camp A: That's far too much food, hmmmm that's so carb heavy, an few olives each surely, we've lost sight of what a normal cliché looks like, blah di blah.

Camp 2: Goodness, I'd chuck, pop and throw and some delicious, nutritious and healthy batch-scratch-cooked wholemeal rye sourdough pizzas in the range cooker for everyone to munch, chomp and gnaw on, with extra crudités and kefir-based dip, in less than 60 seconds, you utterly feral bint.

chopc · 10/04/2023 01:39

I am a generous host. Kids often complain of being hungry if they are bored or haven't eaten enough of what they were given. However if there were no leftovers whatsoever I wonder if there was enough food in the first place?

I know the scenario you described and a good host would have offered any kind of snack even if they didn't want to cook another meal for the kids

And to be fair if it's a good friend, I would tell him/ her the kids are hungry and offer to make something . People usually have bread or pasta around the house so not difficult to boil pasta and Chuck some sauce and cheese in

WhatToDo2023 · 10/04/2023 02:47

Shit hosts. Any dumbo could figure out those kids needed feeding. And so rude to cook the adult food at 4.

I have been in a similar situation. Invited for a bbq at 12. At 3 still hadn't fired up the bbq, no starters or chips around either. Almost everyone had travelled for 1-3 hrs to be there. I ended up eating a half muffin left over in my handbag from 2 days before....

billy1966 · 10/04/2023 09:29

SpinCityBlues · 09/04/2023 15:24

I'm currently living on my own and I could pull a 'light tea' for 8 - 9 children out of my arse in minutes (assuming I wasn't utterly pissed).

Packet of cream crackers. Slab of cheese. Some sliced tomatoes. Toast x 8 or more slices. Jam & peanut butter. Bowl of crisps. <Stares at cupboard>. Bowl of sweetcorn. Tinned tuna and mayo. Melba toasts. Matzos.

You and most people.

I recall having to do so with about 10-12 children that were visiting and playing in a large pool and slide on a hot day that we had set up in the garden.

They were having the best fun and no one wanted it to end.

Two pots of pasta, one with pesto, one with butter, black pepper and grated parmigiana had them all fed and happy.

Followed by Nutella/banana toasties for desert.

I had a huge George Foreman grill at the time which did 5 toasties at once, best appliance ever with young children.

Not nutritionally the greatest, but they were all content and fed.

Lovely memory actually😁.

Any of my friends would have done the same.

We were all adept at getting food on the table quickly.

None of us would listen to a child complain of hunger for 5 minutes.

PuppyMonkey · 10/04/2023 09:51

What hot meal did the kids actually have at 1.30pm, have I missed it?

CasperGutman · 19/06/2023 12:15

PuppyMonkey · 10/04/2023 09:51

What hot meal did the kids actually have at 1.30pm, have I missed it?

I don't think you missed it. But however lavish lunch was, young children can only eat until their tummies are full and will need at least a light meal before 7pm (which was getting on for bedtime for our kids at that age).

StolenCookie · 19/06/2023 15:07

Were the hosts a bit drunk? Is it possible they felt full from snacking and drinking all afternoon and the sense of time got lost?

I imagine the other guests thought the same as you but either didn’t think it was a big deal or they thought they needed to act fine with it as everyone else was.

In my book a 4pm ‘lunch’ is completely unacceptable! I’d be apologising non-stop if I were the host!

Crunchymum · 19/06/2023 15:40

I know this is an old thread but I am intrigued as to whether or not the OP outright asked if the hosts could make the kids some food and was told no (in which case I'd have packed up and left) or if the OP just sat there waiting for the kids to be offered food and they weren't (in which case I'd have as the hosts if they minded making something or if I could rustle something up for the kids)

LuckySantangelo35 · 19/06/2023 16:41

StolenCookie · 19/06/2023 15:07

Were the hosts a bit drunk? Is it possible they felt full from snacking and drinking all afternoon and the sense of time got lost?

I imagine the other guests thought the same as you but either didn’t think it was a big deal or they thought they needed to act fine with it as everyone else was.

In my book a 4pm ‘lunch’ is completely unacceptable! I’d be apologising non-stop if I were the host!

@StolenCookie

“Were the hosts a bit drunk? Is it possible they felt full from snacking and drinking all afternoon and the sense of time got lost? “

yup , this is the most likely scenario! No big deal. No harm done.

Hawkins0001 · 19/06/2023 22:51

Depends on the catering arrangements but that said if you want the adults company longer then the little ones need feeding as a priority then adults afterwards

pollymere · 21/06/2023 13:19

I fast on Good Friday so don't eat before 6pm. The fact it was seafood suggests someone wasn't eating meat at least. I suspect there may have been a realisation at some point so they tried to make lunch as late as possible...

Yerroblemom1923 · 21/06/2023 18:52

I would've shared mine with my children if they were hungry.

Original poster

SquigglyGum · 22/06/2023 10:09

StolenCookie · 19/06/2023 15:07

Were the hosts a bit drunk? Is it possible they felt full from snacking and drinking all afternoon and the sense of time got lost?

I imagine the other guests thought the same as you but either didn’t think it was a big deal or they thought they needed to act fine with it as everyone else was.

In my book a 4pm ‘lunch’ is completely unacceptable! I’d be apologising non-stop if I were the host!

Wow this thread has resurfaced!

Yeah they were a little tipsy but not too drunk to hear a child say they were hungry!

OP posts:

Original poster

SquigglyGum · 22/06/2023 10:10

Yerroblemom1923 · 21/06/2023 18:52

I would've shared mine with my children if they were hungry.

Unfortunately it was a pretty ott seafood spread and not something my kids would eat. I shared what I could despite being starving myself!

OP posts:

Original poster

SquigglyGum · 22/06/2023 10:11

pollymere · 21/06/2023 13:19

I fast on Good Friday so don't eat before 6pm. The fact it was seafood suggests someone wasn't eating meat at least. I suspect there may have been a realisation at some point so they tried to make lunch as late as possible...

No, the idea was a seafood feast because it was Good Friday. I have no idea why the lateness happened!

OP posts:

Original poster

SquigglyGum · 22/06/2023 10:14

Crunchymum · 19/06/2023 15:40

I know this is an old thread but I am intrigued as to whether or not the OP outright asked if the hosts could make the kids some food and was told no (in which case I'd have packed up and left) or if the OP just sat there waiting for the kids to be offered food and they weren't (in which case I'd have as the hosts if they minded making something or if I could rustle something up for the kids)

Ok so I didn't actually say "host, can we give the kids food" because I was standing right next to her when the kids were all saying they were hungry, and she said no you've eaten already. I then gave a bit of leftover rice as I'd said (she saw me do this) and it was just a really odd moment. I was at her house so didn't feel it was right to demand more food, although it was kind of implied in the way it was handled that we all knew the kids were hungry, I was trying to feed them and she had decided no more food. So off we went!

OP posts:

WhythefuxdidI · 16/08/2023 16:30

@SquigglyGum Have you spoken to them since about it, or had any more meals together?

LakieLady · 16/08/2023 16:49

I hate it when people invite you for a meal at a specific time and don't get round to actually feeding you till hours later. I get proper hangry!

It must be even worse for kids.

YerArseInParsley · 14/09/2024 22:31

SquigglyGum · 09/04/2023 06:36

Genuinely not sure if iabu.

Went to a friend's place for lunch on good Friday, 4 families including the host's. 9 kids 3-8yo. It was a seafood lunch, we all brought dishes to share and the host provided lunch for the kids.

Kids ate their hot lunch around 1.30pm. Adults grazed on prawns and chips/dips and for some reason the hosts didn't start cooking the hot parts of our lunch until gone 4pm. The kids were happy playing. We sat down at around 5pm, by that time I was starving (breastfeeding), and half an hour later the kids were all saying they were hungry. The host seemed to either ignore them, or say she'd given them dessert (I.e. stop asking for food, you've had loads), but that was at lunch time and it was coming to dinner time.

Obviously we hadn't come for two meals, but I was surprised she didn't either raise it with us or offer some cheese toasties or something simple. I found some leftover rice from our lunch and offered it to some of the kids but it wasn't enough really. It was clear the host didn't want to feed the kids, but she did want the fun to continue with the adults.

The other parents there didn't seem bothered that their kids were hungry either.

I called time at 7ish when I realised the others were kicking on and the kids wouldn't get fed, so we came home and gave our kids beans on toast, all sorted.

Was ibu to think it was odd not to even acknowledge that the kids needed something for their tea? In that situation I would have rustled up something simple, really to be able to keep on socialising with my mates having kept the kids fed and happy.

What would you have done in this situation? Note that we couldn't have chipped in for a takeaway pizza or anything as it was good Friday and nothing was open.

Interested to hear your thoughts!

Zombie thread I know and I don't care before anyone complains lol

OP can't just go into someone's kitchen and prepare food, that's just rude I wouldn't ask either. It's odd the adult lunch wasn't served until 5pm, was the host too busy socialising to notice the time or was that the intended time for adult food?

It's a bit mean to feed kids at 1.30pm, have no dinner and tell the kids they've had enough food. The host should have made it a late afternoon get-together and served dinner instead. How anyone expects kids not to be hungry again after a 1.30pm lunch is beyond me and I don't get why people are saying op is being unreasonable, it didn't sound like the guests overstayed their welcome, sounds like the hosts wanted to make a night of it.

As this is an old thread I'd imagine yous have had many more get-togethers, if you can be bothered, let us know how they went.