to wear my asexual ring

[Nimbostratus100]

asexuals often wear a black ring on the middle finger of the right hand edited by MNHQ

I think it would be very useful if this was widely recognised and understood,

Then asexuals could go to pubs, clubs, social events and no one would be hitting on them, friendships started at work or hobbies would not be prone to misunderstandings, and accusations of leading people on, and social arrangements could be made without the confusion about whether it is meant to be a date of not.

asexuals would also recognise each other

I think it is similar to earing a wedding ring to say you are in a relationship, wearing an asexual ring to signal that you are not available for a sexual relationship, even though you may be known to be single

I am expecting a load of hostility and aggression on here, because there always is, whenever asexuality is mentioned, but that wont bother me at all, because some people will read this, and learn to recognise the asexual ring, and that is all I want.

"No" is a complete sentence. You don't need to give reasons. Although boring somebody rigid with your identity nonsense might help.

@Nimbostratus100

People dont believe you when you say you are asexaul, and if quite often descends into a waste of time discussion, argument, offering to "cure" you, taking it as personal rejection, etc etc etc

Why would they believe it when you are wearing a ring but not when you say it in words?

Also how close do you have to be to someone to see the rings on their hand?

Goodness, how "special" do you have to be?? Its like the modern version of a masonic handshake....

Seriously, most people just don't care. Wear a bag on your head, a ring on your finger or a flower in your hair. Nobody will notice.

I've lost my wedding ring I remember taking it off in the hospital has they said I needed C-section and putting it in my purse for safe keeping. Some how I managed to loose my purse in the hospital and when I got it back from the security people my ring and money was missing.

Nobody will notice.
Well, there you are, you've just identified the problem... The self styled special people can't bear not being noticed.

I don't know that I would like to advertise any personal information about myself to random strangers.

There are also way too many codes and most people don't know what they mean.

Yellow dog lead?
Burgundy dog coat?
Black ring?

People just don't know this stuff.

Also, just because another person you meet is asexual, that does not mean that you will get on with that person. They could be horrible.

I've learned something new. I never knew about the black ring on the right hand. I'll probably look out for it if I remember.

Thank you, OP. I’ve noticed people wearing these and never given it a second thought beyond ‘what an unusual piece of jewellery, lovely’. I’ve learnt a new thing today!

It's probably just a black ring made in China that means f all 😂

Thing is I don’t know why you even bring up your sexuality as a response. I’m married and occasionally still hit on despite the wedding/engagement rings and a short “sorry, I’m not interested” does the job. You will always get the weirdos who want to push it so you don’t give them anything they can use to keep a conversation going.

Sorry but you come across as a bit of an attention seeker despite claiming you want the opposite.

I don’t recognise this world of continually being hit on or friendships involving misunderstandings or a friendly social occasion needing to be clarified as ‘not a date’. I’m a straight married woman who doesn’t wear a wedding ring, and has male friends and lesbian and bi friends. I can’t say I’ve ever found male friends or colleagues (or indeed gay or bi women) making sexual approaches being a problem. As a pp says, the occasional approach when out is easily dealt with, and lesbian/attached people of either sex just say ‘No, thanks’ if approached. The kind of person who ignores a civil ‘No’ is not going to not approach you because of your magic asexual ring. Are you someone who generally struggles with social interactions?

My husband's wedding ring is a black band. He wears it on his left hand. Some people from central Europe wear their wedding rings in their right hand. I think a black band on right hand would still be an ambiguous symbol.

I don't think sexual orientation or preferences really need to be displayed.

Of course yanbu to wear yours, your choice of course!

But I’m asexual and I don’t want to wear a black ring, it’s not my style at all and would look a bit odd on me.
It would work for the young and/or quirky, but not for a middle aged, outdoorsy-ish, very mainstream looking person like me. And I can’t imagine many men wanting to wear one, unless they have a very specific style of dressing. Since asexuals make up only a tiny percentage of the population anyway, I don’t think black rings will be worn by enough asexual people for it to become a widely understood symbol.

Additionally, I’m actually not sure I want to advertise my sexuality or lack thereof. I don’t like assumptions being made or labels being assigned to me based on what I wear.

Aaaaaah....

Enlightenment dawns.

Followed by a massive yawn of boredom.

Right, back to reality life. I've got to pick a tick off one of my cats and those things freak me the hell out!

Hello from fellow ace, op!

I think the ring is a great idea.
I don’t know if you’re also aromantic.
I’m not and that is why I wear a ring, in hope that other ace would see it and maybe start a conversation.
Hasn’t worked yet, but I don’t know how else to find a partner.

Also, I’m sorry for all the ride comments, I will never understand what it is about not feeling sexual attraction that must make other people be so rude and condescending.
But that is a them promblem, don’t take these nasty comments to heart.

All the best! 💜

I actually have a black ring on that finger. I'm not asexual I had no idea. So I doubt it would prevent advances it's just a ring

What about it?
So many advertise themselves as mothers, wifes, 👩‍❤️‍👨👨‍👩‍👦‍👦…
Are they also awful and attention seeking, with no personality?

Live and let live, maybe loosen up a bit.

I think it's a good idea if you're wanting to make connections with other asexual people. It's a way of presenting yourself and a way to identify others who wish to be seen. But it's not a magic shield that will repel unwanted people or attention, unfortunately. It won't mean anything to the people it doesn't mean anything to.

Maybe just say no thank you? No need to offer strangers private information about your sexuality?!

Oh honey, unfortunately plenty of sleaxes hit on married people too.

The number of times I was hit on in a bar in my youth and when I said I had a boyfriend the answer was "so? Doesn't matter" 🙄

We just need to educate our kids that no means no, not push stupid RomCom shit where a man posters a woman into forgiving him and giving him another chance- the message is toxic.

@YouAreNotBatman I will never understand what it is about not feeling sexual attraction that must make other people be so rude and condescending.

The rudeness (I would call it bluntness) you’re witnessing on the thread is not because the OP doesn’t experience sexual attraction; it’s because people don’t really care what strangers do or don’t get up to in their sex lives.

😆

I think it would be mistaken for the kind of ring you can pay with, those come in black
As far as I am aware, you could tattoo across your forehead that you are unavailable and there will always be some who do not respect it
Go for it but it's significance is only that of jewellery