To ask a mum to keep her kids quiet on the train?

[Wiennetta]

I specifically booked a seat on a quiet carriage as I’m working on a 4 hour train journey (as are most people in the carriage, or reading, snoozing etc). Next to me on the other side of the aisle is a mum with a two year old who is watching his iPad on full volume. He has been running around up and down the aisle with another child, shouting, screaming and so on.

I was trying to concentrate on something, listening on my headphones and politely asked the mum if they could keep it down - at this point the kid was literally next to my seat, in the aisle, jumping up and down and shouting. She just said, ‘he’s two, what do you expect me to do?’

I mean they’re kids, they’re little, they’re bored. But AIBU I thinking the parents should at least try and moderate their behaviour, remind them to be quiet, try and get them to sit down and do something a bit calmer? Even if it’s not always successful?

Or preferably not book the bloody quiet carriage.

If you book seats you can get the quiet coach even if you don't want it.

On most train operators’ booking websites you have to tick a box for Quiet Coach. It’s a positive choice. If you’re travelling with DC, it’s a dick move.

I wouldn't unless there was absolutely no option and if absolutely no other option then yes it would, also this gentleman is suggesting it's unacceptable on a train whatsoever not specifically in the quiet coach.

Yes, playing sounds on an electronic device to the annoyance of any other person is unacceptable. That's why it is prohibited in the byelaws.

Have some consideration for other passengers, particularly those with sensory issues who will find the scratchy sounds that come out of someone else's phone speakers distressing. You do not have the right to inflict Paw Patrol upon the rest of the carriage. Believe me, your definition of "barely audible" will be far louder to others than you realise.

@Forgooodnesssakenow

most people wouldn’t particularly want to hear either.

just don’t travel on the quiet carriage and then there won’t be an issue.

simple.

@DdraigGoch I wish all train staff were like you! Thanks for looking afterALL your passengers!

@BlueHeelers Here here! :)

@DdraigGoch Thanks for looking out for people like me :)

Exactly this. And for those children who cannot get by with iPads then it’s fine to watch them but just have the sound off when in public

I wish you were on every train!

If you pre book the train you can often pick up first class for a couple £ more. I do it and it’s so peaceful!

Ha! At least three online papers have articles based on this thread! 🙈

Here's one:

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-11933015/I-booked-quiet-carriage-four-hour-train-journey-mum-let-child-run-screaming.html

Which is what I do. It is worth every penny.

@DdraigGoch

thank your for the job you do 😊🙏

I’m hoping i don’t get any verbal abuse, when I bring my son onto a train or any public transport, about him being quiet. As he’s has a learning disability and is Autistic.

My 8 yo is autistic too and says very few words but has been on public transport since he was a baby (I don’t drive) and enjoys being on buses and trains. I have different things to settle him which usually works. I have never had any verbal abuse and the one time he has gotten really upset, I immediately took him out of the car and into the corridor to calm him down and we weren’t going back in until he was settled.

As long as an obvious effort is made very few are going to say something negative or be abusive.

We have just come back from Paris on the Eurostar.
My three year old sat in his seat and read his magazine (French Paw Patrol!) and the older couple behind me, I’d say early 70s played Candy Crush with their mobile phones with the volume turned up high. It was so infuriating, and unnecessary. Some people are dickheads.

Last time I booked a quiet carriage, a mum with several school age children noisily ran an activity table for them... Full on picnic, raucous games, toys and ostentatious explanations and observations... We get it, she's a brilliant mum, just deeply resented by carriage of people desperately trying to concentrate, read, work or rest. Only the quietest of children should travel in the quiet carriage.

That sounds really tough.

But that's clearly not what the other poster was saying, is it?

If someone politely asked you to use headphones, you could talk to them about why that wouldn't work for your child. Have a conversation, you know, like adults do. Not expect everyone to automatically understand your situation without having all the information.

No one has suggested throwing distressed children off the train!

Beanie hats with in built headphones

Forgooodnesssakenow · 04/04/2023 03:23

To be clear my son would have scr amed until violently sick because at the point where I'd give it n and offer cocomelon ALL other options would have been tried, food, cuddles, walking up and down the train aisle, books, toys, fidget toys etc and until 2.5 he couldn't tolerate headphones. If you'd prefer a child screaming, sobbing and wretching over a barely audible cocomelon video your humanity needs examining.”

Presumably you didn’t book the quiet carriage?

The child is 2, so obviously not going to understand much. But if you have booked a quiet spot then she shouldn't be there, she's probably non the wiser and needs to be pointed out she's in the wrong carriage. If my child was acting out and I knew it was a quiet carriage, I'd be very apologetic and move. I'd still try to keep them quiet on other parts but if someone piped up I'd say they are a small child, so she probably didn't realise

@Bluela18

As this happened in March, it's likely that the child may be 3 now :-)

Of course it's anti social to use speakers on a train. I'm surprised you have to ask!