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Original poster

How to stop SIL bringing children to girls hen do abroad

512 replies

Pink39tree · 28/03/2023 17:23

Right going to bullet point as much as possible otherwise it’s too long:
-I’m the maid of honour that organised a hen do abroad.
-19 of us going originally was 20
-small boutique adult only resort. , we have booked 10 rooms. We were under the impression that as we had booked nearly all the rooms we would pretty much have exclusive access to the whole resort. It’s okay if we we didn’t and there were other guests there but it’s just so your aware that in terms of guests there it would be just us so hard to avoid each other
-sister in law of the bride is the typical nightmare sister in law, has made the whole process difficult
-SIL then decided she wanted to pull out AFTER WE BOOKED as she couldn’t justify spending that much on a hen do.
-She wanted her money back for the room, as she’s a difficult person who can’t get her head around the fact it’s already been paid to hotel and if we cancel the room the other person sharing her room would be without a room or we all have to pay to reimburse her
-This caused a big bust up as SIL was adamant she wanted money back, so bride took the hit and paid her sum.
-This was 4 months ago, everything settled. Now SIL has disclosed that she really doesn’t want to miss out on hen and as she couldn’t justify spending this much on a hen do so she’s combining this with her family holiday so she’s rebooked to our holiday with the brides 4 nieces and nephews that are all young and the brides future brother in law (brother of the groom)
-How can I help fix this, brides distraught she doesn’t want to let her hair loose and getting drunk while her nieces and nephews are sat in the pool watching her and her brother in law who is very conservative to see everything that’s going on.
-Additionally the brides nieces and nephews are very attached to her and so she knows they will keep coming up to her.
-Have already emailed the hotel to ask why for an adult only hotel 4 children are being allowed to stay, so far it appears that they were under the impression they were joining our big booking and as we would of then booked all available rooms for that time then it would be okay.
-Have been in contact with hotel also to ask to cancel booking because surely allowing children there is a breach of their contract of being “adult only” so far they are not budging
-If we push to have the hotel cancel their booking due to the no children rule then SIL will know it’s come from us.
help….

OP posts:
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Original poster
Pink39tree · 04/04/2023 21:35

Ginger1982 · 04/04/2023 21:08

I'm confused. Why can't her DH stay at home and watch the kids?

So from what we understand, it seems like she’s still planning on coming with her husband so it will be a couples holiday. That’s why she’s saying there’s nobody to look after the kids/ and it’s only the kids that are upset they can’t come.

OP posts:
Enko · 04/04/2023 21:39

Great update.

Zonder · 04/04/2023 21:40

Pink39tree · 04/04/2023 21:35

So from what we understand, it seems like she’s still planning on coming with her husband so it will be a couples holiday. That’s why she’s saying there’s nobody to look after the kids/ and it’s only the kids that are upset they can’t come.

Show quote history

Can someone actually remind her what a hen party is? It's not husbands / partners / couples! Nobody else is going to bring their blokes, are they?

youtwoandme · 04/04/2023 21:59

I can't believe the Groom hasn't bothered to step in here?!? ... and the grooms brother WANTS to go on the hen do. They sound spineless and embarrassing!!

Well done for the great result OP!! I can't believe she called you a 'muppet' !!! I'd be furious!!

Curseofthenation · 04/04/2023 22:04

The groom seriously needs to step up and talk to his brother. This is ridiculous.

SmallAngryPenguinWoman · 04/04/2023 22:09

Pink39tree · 04/04/2023 21:35

So from what we understand, it seems like she’s still planning on coming with her husband so it will be a couples holiday. That’s why she’s saying there’s nobody to look after the kids/ and it’s only the kids that are upset they can’t come.

Show quote history

The whole thing is ridiculous, but even more so now. What is wrong with this woman??? 😕
I really think the groom needs to get involved more and tell his brother to Cop the Fuck On, he can't go anywhere near the hen party!

MoroccanRoseHChurch · 04/04/2023 22:14

This. Is. Mad. Wtf is wrong with the SIL?

SqueakyDinosaur · 04/04/2023 22:17

If she's that keen on being part of it then maybe she can find somewhere nearby for her family, and then she can come along for an evening (of inflatable willies and appalling jokes...)?

IScreamAtMichaelangelos · 04/04/2023 22:24

Has the bride been clear with her that brother is not welcome at any point of proceedings?!

Gothambutnotahamster · 04/04/2023 22:27

Unbelievable. If I were the bride, I'd just ignore her from now on and if she does turn up with her DH, ignore both of them (but I really hope she doesn't as that's just mean).

MyLoveIsYourLove0xO · 04/04/2023 22:27

What an entitled twat
Bride was very calm and gracious
I'd be fuming 😡

Ginger1982 · 04/04/2023 22:31

The groom needs to get involved now. His brother sounds like a total perv wanting to come and watch you all.

Iwannabeacrocodilehunter · 04/04/2023 22:33

What a weird person. I didn’t realise there were people out there like this.

Bringing her husband, the grooms brother to the hen??? She should just stay home to be honest.

And messaging the bride as she did…wow. I’d have uninvited her there and then.

JenniferBooth · 04/04/2023 22:38

Anyone here seen the Steptoe and Son film where the old man goes on honeymoon with them.

Well this is the modern day equivilent Id start calling her Albert Steptoe from here on in.

meganorks · 04/04/2023 22:43

Surely the thing to do if you can't afford to go without making it a family holiday is to stay somewhere else with your family and leave the kids with your husband for 1 day or a couple of evenings. Join in with some of the hen do but still have a holiday with your family. Why the hell would anyone want to take their husband and/or kids on the actual hen do?!

UndercoverCop · 04/04/2023 22:46

I couldn't be friendly with someone like that. Mainly due to her use of 'use' to mean you (plural) and the general twattery.

Star81 · 04/04/2023 22:57

has she ever been on a hen do ? Am beginning to think she hasn’t and doesn’t understand the concept!

k1233 · 04/04/2023 23:21

For reference, apart from the fact it is extremely poor English, the word is youse not use in the context in which it was written. I usually don't care but a combination of hating the word in the first place AND it being incorrectly spelled oh my, the grating!

As for the SIL, I agree the groom needs to say something to his brother. She sounds like a sandwich short of a picnic to be honest.

IScreamAtMichaelangelos · 04/04/2023 23:23

If SIL does succeed in bringing her husband, I do hope the bride gets sufficiently drunk to shout "Why the FUCK are you at my hen do, you weirdo" at her prospective BIL. Or perhaps another hen can make this observation and apologise very sincerely later on Halo

Lefteyetwitch · 04/04/2023 23:28

Ayprill?!
JFC just when I think nothing worse can come out of that family

fruitbrewhaha · 05/04/2023 00:02

God she thick, isn’t she? Use! Use! Wtaf?

Merlo · 05/04/2023 00:07

One word….USE!!!

Seriously though, how do you even reason with someone like that?

RealHousewifeofExhaustion · 05/04/2023 00:09

IScreamAtMichaelangelos · 04/04/2023 23:23

If SIL does succeed in bringing her husband, I do hope the bride gets sufficiently drunk to shout "Why the FUCK are you at my hen do, you weirdo" at her prospective BIL. Or perhaps another hen can make this observation and apologise very sincerely later on Halo

Think she would have to say "Why are "use" at my hen do" or else they wouldn't understand

cherish123 · 05/04/2023 00:35

Stay out of it. Let bride and SIL sort it themselves.

FiledAwayInABox · 05/04/2023 01:12

My oh my!