If your DC failed their GCSEs what are they doing now?

[Amber53]

Posting here for traffic.

I’ve been scouring past MN threads about this subject and often wonder what the future held for the DC who didn’t do well.

Reason being, DS who has struggled with MH, suicidal ideation, diagnosed ADHD and in the ASD pathway, bullied, will most likely leave school without any GCSEs. He’s had an horrendous time throughout really.

My main objective is to work with him and help with his MH. Bottom line is, when he’s away from the school environment he’s a different person, so he’s currently doing online lessons. When in school his MH declines, so we’re thankful he only has weeks left.

I can’t help but worry about the future though without GCSEs. I keep this hidden from him of course, but as a parent it’s only natural to worry about these things.

Can I ask anyone who has been through similar how your DC are doing now? How did they navigate the next step?

As DC now have to continue their education, I just don’t know what we should be encouraging next. DS doesn’t really know what he wants to do. He said he’d just like to work, earn money. I think the reality might be easier said than done, although I understand this viewpoint as he’s had such a negative experience so far. Why would he want to go onto somewhere he thinks will be just the same I.e college, 6th form etc.

We are currently trying to apply for an EHCP, although it’s going to be a long battle judging by the many things I’ve read. Too late to help with the current secondary school situation but might help for the future?

If anyone could share their experiences or offer any help it would be much appreciated.

Yes, know quite a few who did this.
Left toxic family situations. Found non toxic friends, Co workers, good therapists

Improved self esteem, confidence, boundaries, and resilience.

Went back to school ranging from apprenticeships in trades to advanced degrees. All happy and successful.

Getting away from toxic environment and getting support are the key factors in every case.

Full-time apprenticeship, remote college course with English and maths taken at college as part of the apprenticeship.

She loves it, brings home £1000 a month and qualifies next month. She's now got English and maths, and has been offered a role elsewhere on the basis of her (upcoming) qualifications.

Couldn't recommend it highly enough.

My dd only got 3 last year. She's at a new sixth form, resitting English and doing three b tecs. She's thriving and getting distinctions for all her work. GCSEs are a nightmare if you can't learn in the way they want you too and there's so much more choice post 16 xx

@Amber53  we are in an almost identical situation. I'm so glad you started this thread as I too had searched and wondered. Living each day as it comes and trying not to let myself think too much about the future. I hope you find the right path forward for you and your DS.

@FrillyGoatFluff I notice you mentioned a remote college that you DD is using - is this through her apprenticeship or separate? Is it a college you would recommend (sorry OP for the slight hijack)?

She had a Saturday job at her workplace and they basically converted it into a full time customer service apprenticeship through a local college - we found the course, contacted the college and they did all the setting up with work.

Worked out for the company as they got all sorts of grants (and a full time person for very minimal pay!) and perfect for her. It's a customer service apprenticeship, with a local online sales business. She handles all of their customer service (honestly all of it!) and it's been brilliant for her to learn quickly.

It's a local college, so she has an allocated tutor, but 90% of it has been done via conference calls, her tutor just pops in to work occasionally to see her. She took her exams at college (online tutor groups once a week) and has been in three times recently to collate coursework.

It's been an absolute breeze, she's loved it.

Not my DC but my DH. He failed all his GCSEs due to undiagnosed dyslexia. He went out and got an office job, attended college part time, did an access to university course, went to uni with a degree and is now senior management in the sector he worked in after failing and taking an MBA as part of his pathway to directorship.

@FrillyGoatFluff that's brilliant - well done your DD! Good to know that there are genuine paths forwards for these young people.

to all those yet to find their path and those supporting them

my niece failed hers. Also went on to do an apprenticeship and did english and maths as part of that. I think if you can try and get him to do english and maths that would be great. She is now a hairdresser and nail technician and bringing in more money than her brothers and very happy! Some children are not cut out for academic work.

An ex passed only one GCSE and joined the Navy. He stayed in for a few years before moving to the private aviation sector and ultimately becoming the CEO of a company who charter private jets. Now retired at the age of 55 and extremely well off. He did his MBA along the way too
He was not academic at school but very gifted at all things electrical so I suppose it was just finding his niche in life.

Inspiring posts! Thanks for much for sharing.

Even though DS’s future is uncertain and one that will probably still include many hurdles, your own personal stories have given me hope that at some point, his future will be bright.

We just need some advice from somewhere, about his options. Don’t really know the careers advisor at school but maybe that’s a start?

Meant to add a bunch of these for you all! 💐

@UniversallyChallenged123 I hope this thread helps you too! 💐

Mine went to college to do a level 1 then level 2 course alongside retaking maths and english but he didnt get them. Actually he did get drama gcse at school.
He also found aspects of this hard and needed support. I was glad when he left education tbh. He now works part time in the local theatre either in their cafe or ushering and really enjoys it

I got a GCSE Grade E in Maths!
D in Science
C in English

D for everything else...

I did some GNVQs at college, a National Diploma and then a degree!
I'm now an architect.

(I did have to get a GCSE equivalent I'm maths alongside my degree though. But being ASD I managed to get support!)

Lots of us work in the sector so if you wanted to post a bit more info I’m sure we could help. If you don’t want to post more details you can DM me direct and I’m happy to help (qualified careers advisor).

as PP have said if they can get maths and English at all that would be the way to go - even if they don’t sit other GCSES to facilitate this

My friends son is at our local FE college on a life skills course and they add in more academic work as and when it’s appropriate. I think he’s looking at going on to a plumbing Btec once this finishes. He’ll keep working to get his maths and English GCSEs alongside that.

Plumpton?

No, one in Hampshire. It's fab.

My DS didn’t do too well in GCSE’s and worked with my DH for about 2 years, but this didn’t work out and he got a job in an engineering company where he stayed about 3 years, then left to join another engineering company. He’s doing really well and just been promoted.

My nephew did a lvl 2 engineering course at college while retaking maths and English. Did 2 years at college and then got a job.

Lots of inspiring stories here from PP. Schools like to make out that if you don’t do well in your exams at 16, which is a fairly tumultuous time for a lot of people, that you've ruined your life. It's not true. There are so many pathways to success. Your future is not defined by how you did at school. We all get to where we are supposed to be in our own time and in our own way. Best of luck to your DC

And also, mental health is so much more important than exams. Focus on helping your son get well. What's any of it worth if you aren't happy and healthy?

What a great thread, I actually feel a bit teary! My Y10 is really struggling and the guilt and pressure I've been feeling is immense. Easy to lose sight of the bigger picture.

My cousin didn’t take GCSE’s. Severe illness at the time. He is now a microbiologist with PhD.