Neighbour has told our village I am a thief

[crazyneighbour123]

NC as obviously outing

Last night around 8:30pm a delivery driver asked me to take a parcel for a neighbour a few doors down and said he had knocked my door as my gate was open (all houses on my street have a gate and a pathway to the front door, roughly 20meters). The parcel was 2ft high and 2ft wide and heavy so I managed to push it along my hallway out of the way.

Here is the issue. At 6:50am there was banging and when I say banging I mean banging on my front door. I ran downstairs worried something was wrong and hoping it wouldn’t wake the whole house up.

It was my male neighbour who is in his 40s who didn’t bother to say hello only said where is my parcel. I explained it come last night let me get it. As I was pushing it down the hallway towards the door he said ‘ no need to be so dramatic there’s no need to pretend it’s too heavy that’s why you didn’t bother to bring it over last night, you just could not be bothered’ . I was shocked and just said how he wasn’t in thats why the deliver drive gave me the parcel and it is heavy. He then said he was in but was having his dinner and it was raining so didn’t answer the door and I should have had some respect and done the polite thing and taken the parcel to him. I started laughing as I thought he was joking. He then tried picking it up and realised how heavy it was and how far he had to go with it told me the least I can do is help him carry it back to his house I laughed and said I couldn’t. He then called me a waste of space. I then told him ‘ I hope there’s weights in that box cause you bloody well need them’ and shut the door.

He has now posted on the village Facebook (I know social media is the root of all evil) and has bad mouthed me and called me a thief and a chav and that everyone should be careful around me as I will try and take their deliveries to keep for myself. This is not true and unluckily for him I have this all recorded on the ring doorbell. You can hear us both word for word and see how angry he is in the video. Question is would I be unreasonable to post it onto the village Facebook group or should I just send it privately to the main admin person. My only issue with sending it privately which is the more mature option is the main admin owner walks her dogs with him so not sure if she would fully make the other members of the group aware of what actually happened? I could just try the private route first but it’s making me feel awkward going out today that everyone in the village thinks I’m a thief.

YANBU - post it on the Facebook group so the whole village will know the truth

YABU - send it only to the admin privately and hope she does the right thing

Don’t get yourself involved in any further conversation about it op; I wouldn’t even have posted anything tbh but now you have, just leave it

🤣🤣🤣

Sorry OP, that comment has tickled me.

FWIW, bravo to your handling of this. That's clearly the last ever parcel any neighbour will ever take in for him.

This, but if it's on FB it will be written so a libellous comment, not slanderous.

I would also mention that it is hardly your fault if he is too lazy to either answer his door or come across to collect HIS parcel from you. You are neither a delivery nor a warehousing service and that he had better answer the door for his parcels next time because I would certainly never take in anything for him again.

What a melt.

This

Came for the parcel, stayed for the squabble!

I LOVE Mumsnet!

I would, as the previous poster has suggested, offer to post the doorbell footage and then add that you recommend that if anyone else is asked to accept a parcel for this person they refuse, unless they also wish to be slandered.

Since when was taking over your neighbour’s parcel part of the deal? You’re not the postal service!! It’s their job to come to you to collect it after you’ve kindly stored it. You could have easily told the postman that you wouldn’t take it and then the guy would have to go to the depot. What a twat.

Well he sounds like a peach. As you've discovered with your neighbour, probably everyone will know what a dick he is and loving the drama on the page. I think your response was perfect. I wonder if he just won't reply now.

In the Art of War, Sun Zhu says if you make an enemy, you must obliterate him totally or he will be emboldened and come back for more trouble.

OK, then, if it's now reached the final Death Or Glory stage, I think the neighbour needs to receive another massive box in the post labelled 'fragile - open indoors on soft surface only' - with 100kg of spring-loaded glitter inside!

Yeah and I wait for the neighbours to collect their package. I don't know why they weren't in, how long til they're home etc!

Well handled OP

I’m not sure what villages some of these posters live in but the local page is completely outing as to who the local knobheads are in ours. It’s very telling that he responds to everything. He’d be on my list for that alone and I would take anything he said with a big pinch of salt.

To be fair I do sometimes take parcels round to the neighbours if I’m going out and I see they are back. But meh I mean he was in when it arrived anyway, that is CF level on its own.

I love this ❤️ Very proportionate for the situation.

Brilliant idea!

If necessary, crowdfund this OP.

I'll bet there's dozens of people itching to contribute.

Just asa matter of interest . . . does he live alone?

<suspect we all know the answer to this one>

He does sound unhinged. Now you've responded I'd block again in 48hrs because his response to the frog suggests he will escalate. Perhaps edit to expand that you have video footage with sound of the driver asking you to take it in and of nutjob accusing you of stealing it?

YANBU

And perhaps remind him that he asked you to help him carry it home AFTER verbally abusing you.

Yeah and I wait for the neighbours to collect their package. I don't know why they weren't in, how long til they're home etc!

I suppose it depends on whether the delivery person puts a card through or not, saying 'left at no 43'. Otherwise, they may have no idea that it's been delivered and/or to where (especially if they're going to just ignore the doorbell when the delivery person comes).

But it takes a particularly arrogant and unintelligent person to equate a neighbour taking in your parcel (that you couldn't be bothered to take in yourself) in the evening and not yet having had chance to contact you early the next morning with that neighbour stealing your parcel.

This has certain parallels with the other thread about the maverick gardener mowing random lawns without the owner's knowledge or agreement - and then the householder being accused of scamming him.

Passive theft, passive scamming; I'm sure none of the 'Nigerian princes' just sit at their computers waiting for somebody to randomly email them to ask if perchance they may have $250,000,000 that they need to quickly transfer to a stranger in a different country and would be willing to pay 25% of it to said stranger as a reward, upon receipt of an initial large upfront processing fee!

This is the kind of shit that happens on our village facebook page as well.

Best of luck OP.

(In other words- placemarking!!).

Just asa matter of interest . . . does he live alone?

<suspect we all know the answer to this one>

That's very judgey of you, to clearly imply that nobody would want to live with him. For all we know, he may well live in his mum's basement and spend his days snuggled under his Paw Patrol single duvet, eating Ricicles from his special Thomas The Tank Engine bowl.

Most people reading all of that will be far more likely think ''wow i don't want to get on the wrong side of that guy'' than they would be to think ''right, noted, that woman is A Thief''.

I have been on the receiving end of a smear campaign (my mother) and I decided not to give oxygen to a campaign to clear my name. It isn't a nice feeling though. It's really quite uncomfortable.

I would post on the group warning people not to take parcels in for Mr Smith at number 8 because you have been verbally abused and intimidated by him and want to warn others about his behaviour. You can share the footage if you want or say you have it to share if people need to see it.

Post it and let him know he could be sued for libel. What an arse.

Ah 'Parcel Gate' I know thee well.
We lived in a village where anything sent by courier would go missing. Our next door neighbours enjoyed my son's basketball boots. They were a bright limited edition colour. Easy to spot.
Those suggesting legal action are not aware of the cost of litigation. It is huge. Defamation is notoriously difficult to prove. (remember the recent Jonny Depp case? he lost). No solicitor would take it on nwnf.
My DH has been accused of being a drug dealer in our smart market town (he has never even smoked a fag). As angry as it makes me we can't be arsed to go after the local estate agent who has been telling people this. Luckily we are moving away shortly.
Call him out by all means OP but he doesn't sound the full shilling.

Sounds like you live in Royston Vasey I’d get out asap🤣 On a serious note he sounds unhinged and a psycho steer clear and never take parcels in again.