To think parents should NOT let primary aged children on messaging/social media?

[SocialMediaPITA]

I'm a primary school teacher in year 6. I spend lots of time having to deal with pupils falling out with each other on messaging apps/social media outside of school hours. They then bring these issues into school the next day, and there are tears, tantrums and, on some occasions, fights. And staff have to give up lunch hours, break time and learning/lesson time to deal with the fall out. Children can't learn if they are brewing on what's happened the night before, eg falling out with their peers.

Why do parents let their children on social media? The min age for WhatsApp is 16 - it's 16 for a reason! Many primary aged children are not emotionally able to deal with issues via messaging - even as adults we can recognise that tone and body language can play a huge part in communicating - social media and messaging removes that important aspect and if we as adults can get it wrong, why do we expect children to be able to deal with it? It's affecting their mental health.

I've mopped too many tears this week and much of it can be avoided.

How does that work if you have multiple children at multiple schools don’t drive and they all start within 5-15minutes of each other anyway.

Do I love that my 14 year old travels an hour for school on public transport nope. Does he want to move schools? Nope.

Do I love that my 11 year old will be walking near 30minutes to school in September alone nope. There is no secondary closer for dd. Then I have my third a year 3 then. Certainly she cannot walk her self. So my middle has a phone to get used to having a phone ready for September.

My oldest has a phone because he travels so far and it has his bus ticket as well as his multiple homework apps. Also because secondary don’t tell you if they have a detention where as he could then text me to let me know rather than me worrying my 14 is lost, dead or missing in general. Would school let him ring me for a detention nope.

I've definitely thought about it more because of this thread. But, you never get people to change their minds by telling them they are thoughtless idiots.

My dc don't have access to their phones all evening. I monitor it via Family link and it gets turned off in the evening.

That is a very good point @TorviShieldMaiden , you’re right.

@SocialMediaPITA Fellow yr6 Teacher here & I completely agree - it really grinds my gears!!!!

I found that my approach (no social media, no YouTube, no internet browser use without an adult being present) in primary school made other parents a bit defensive, so I stopped talking about it unless asked.

I’m finding this discussion really interesting. Thanks for raising it OP!

Just a note about schools relying on smart phones in lessons - this annoys me so much! If my DS’s primary school demanded that we have access to apps on a phone for learning I would consider changing schools. This is a hill I will die on.

I work at a school which is a ‘phone free campus’. We have strict rules and signs everywhere about ‘NO PHONES’. We have permission to confiscate them if we see them and the parents are sent it to pick them up.

However, all the kids have phones (I teach secondary). They film tic toks in the bathroom at lunchtime. They take insta stories during class. What annoys me more is when a teacher will post on slack ‘so and so has permission to use his phone to film a Spanish assessment’. We’re a phone-free campus, why does your Spanish assessment rely on a phone!? The management never say anything.

So, being ‘phone free’ and saying that you’re ‘phone free’ are two completely different things in my experience.

Also, I hate confiscating phones. Many years ago, I confiscated a phone from a student and accidentally dropped it while taking it to the Head’s office. The parents raised hell and tried to make me pay for a new one (it wasn’t even damaged btw). The head had my back but it was a really horrible situation. Since then I’ve been so wary of taking phones, especially since they’re so expensive now.

My fellow teachers, solidarity with you as we navigate this minefield!!! 😂😭

@TTeachingteacher I've refused to collect phones at the beginning of the day because I have no where to lock them. If one went 'missng' no way in hell am I going to take the fall!