AIBU to turn down council property?

[worldcupfan]

NC.

After 10 years and four rejections. We have been shortlisted to view a council property. The property seems good to be true, not too far from DC's school, local shops, food transport links (where DC can travel to school) the monthly rent is quarter of my overall salary (which would mean we will managing decently) and the rooms are spacious. Also! DC will have his first proper room. We currently live in a 1 bedroom flat.DC has my room and I sleep in the living room.

But! It's not a ground floor. It's on the first floor. DC is 12, has "high functioning Autism" but has severe horrendous meltdowns, he will shout, cry, scream, jump up and down. We are getting help with this and I have hired private cognitive therapy, have a specialist who will be working with me in the home to manage DC's meltdowns. But I am so worried about disturbing the new neighbours below us. In my current place, it's like I'm having to walk on eggshells as I'm managing to prevent DC's meltdowns so that the neighbours don't complain- but also feel that I can never relax in my home and feel that I'm constantly walking on eggshells to prevent DC's meltdowns. Sadly, it looks like I will have to decline the offer but my friends and family are telling me that I'm crazy. What should I do?

Bollocks. I've lived I a ground floor flat

themellowmat.co.uk/

Something like this might really help.

Go for it and best wishes, agree with everyone else who is saying yes!

Would talking to the potential new neighbours first be an option? To some people a small family like yours would be ideal and worth the hassle of an occasional noisy meltdown.

Take it.

It will take time to deal with, but it's months v years.

Take it and use the excess budget to buy the the thickest, most muffling carpet ever (and thick underlay!)

Completely agree with this. If you haven’t lived below constant levels of noise you cannot understand how debilitating it is. Do not take it.

Take the council accommodation to secure a tenancy, and then request a disabled persons grant from your council. This should reflect the needs of the occupant, and sound-proofing can be part of that. On top, you would qualify for insulation and other measures under a Government grant possibly (EC04). Once in, if you don't settle then you could look into a home-swap with someone else?

OP, please take this flat.

You and your son have a right to safe and secure housing that suits your needs as much as anyone.

Introduce yourself to your neighbours, explain in an informative but not apologetic way, and enjoy your home.

You are a good Mum.

I'd take it and make sure you have thick underlay, carpet and rugs on top.

Take it! Once you have a council property most councils allow tenants to swop with other tenants. Getting your first council property is the most difficult!

Take it, live in it for however long you have to now and get an exchange at a later date maybe. See it as a stepping stone. Research how you can dampen the sound of the floor. There will be a way

Take the property! Then get one of those little indoor trampolines or a puppy bed and tell him to jump up and down on it when he has a meltdown.
https://www.homefitnesscode.com/products/fitness-40-folding-trampoline-exercise-trampoline-for-kids-adults-rebounder-trampoline-for-indoor-outdoor?utm_source=AWIN&utm_medium=982195&utm_campaign=Shopping+Directory&https%3A%2F%2Fshopforward.nl&1527.8c164d9196501d5a217b298f84068b2d&awc=22136_1679692385_3e2b107bd70c4cdd448dda7c9fa382e0

Channel the energy as it can’t be smothered in a meltdown.

You can dampen noise where you need to, so take it.

Good luck x

Take it and worry about the other issues later and work on them your already doing all the right things if you refuse this it could be years before you get an offer like this

I understand your worries because I have children with asd and I'm always apologising to me neighbours about my sons noises ( they are fab and equally noisy neighbours).
Your son might settle once he's got more space and if he doesn't and your neighbours complain it's a good reason for you moving into a more suitable house and will work in your favour.

If you took it would you be in a better position for a swap?

Take it!

If there are issues further down the line they can move you to another place but at least you will be in the system.

As other people have mentioned get some good carpets/rugs.

A housing officer told me recently that she knew of no first floor council/housing associations in her borough. This is one of the largest in London. She has disabled - wheelchair bound - tenants who she can’t rehouse or house.
Take it.

Honestly you need to take it. In 10 years you've only shortlisted on 2 ground floor properties and both went elsewhere. Staying where you are for potentially another 10 years when you have the chance to move into more affordable and much more suitable housing is just not sensible. Your mh is likely to improve by having your own bedroom again, There's every chance ds will cope better in more suitable accom as well. You mention the anxiety around the new neighbours because of sons issues, but you also mention your having trouble with your current neighbours, so even if the new neighbours do become an issue it's the same troubles but your personal circumstances will have improved massively. Take it op. Give yourself a break. Good luck x

It sounds like you’re a considerate person but you need to put your DC and yourself first here, other families certainly will be. Who knows, you could turn down the property and someone less thoughtful and even noisier could take it instead. As others have said, just do your best to mitigate the noise.

Oh I hope you do get it. I agree with the suggestion that you should be able to get grants towards creating a more suitable space for your son. You might like to think about or talk to your son or his therapists about, what would a place he could retreat to look/feel/smell/sound like?

So in the first instance, yes some sound insulation / thicker carpet etc, but maybe - especially if the rooms are well-sized as you mentioned - you'll get the opportunity to optimise part of his room in a way that will give him other outlets or security, so that in time he becomes more able to manage how he is feeling, or retreat from difficulties, before reaching the point of absolute meltdown.

Very best wishes.

Would this be a life long tenancy OP? I would seek advice from the council and express your concerns

People (your potential new neighbours) would wonder what all the noise is about if your DS has meltdowns living in a block of flats.

How many offers are you able to reject?

Take it. Please take it. You need the room. You may never get a garden flat or house.