To not feel able to cook in my kitchen because it’s dirty

[WoIsMe]

My DH did the kitchen yesterday after dinner and this is what I find when I go to make my own breakfast and my kids’ lunches. I don’t feel that I can prepare food without cleaning up the kitchen first but I have to get my kids to school and get to a meeting at 9 a.m. while my DH has already gone out to work.

So, AIBU for feeling that I can’t cook in this kitchen without having to clean it first?

Six minutes to clean that? Unless those brown crumbs are little bits of shit I can’t see a big issue here except in your head.

I’m guessing your kids aren’t teenagers yet - brace yourself

This has got to be a wind up!

Oh come on! Really? 30 secs to wipe it clean. Annoying that your DH didn’t do if, but hardly preventative to you cooking.

I guess everyone has different standards.
The crumbs I'd just brush off into the sink or bin.
Then I'd make the kids sandwiches on it, unless the crumbs may have left a funny taste like chocolate or garlic.

Unless there's raw meat being left on the countertop, it's going to be pretty clean in general. Because there aren't that many sick-making germs wandering about unless food is left for days uncovered.

The sink I'd leave til later.

If a grape fell into the sink I'd run it under the tap again. I'd do that anyway because even if the sink was clean I wouldn't want cleaner on the grape either!
If you use a sieve to wash the grapes that's handy. Or wash them all in the plastic punnet and then store them in the fridge. Then you don't have to wash little portions.

It’s not unreasonable to have feelings as long as sometimes you realise that your feelings are unreasonable!

I'd have to clean that up before I started. Is your DH using strategic incompetence, to get out of doing it the night before? Yes, six minutes isn't long and it isn't much of a mess, so easily cleaned up by the DH, as it was supposed to be. It's half a job done.

Op it's a few crumbs, I don't think anyone thinks it's a marriage ending drama just a pretty pointless question. Might clean it before cooking might not, would have been quicker to clean up than to photo and post the thread though I imagine

Your kitchen is dirty but that's more than one meals worth of dirt.

My kitchen has been in far worse states especially when the kids were at home. I just cleared everything into the sink to deal with after, wiped my work surface down and crack on

It is a bit grubby looking and you wouldnt prepare food where the crumbs are. Depends what is usual for clearing up in your house.

Like a few other posters here I am living and have been for the past year living in a building site.
Whilst everyone should clean up after themselves you have spent a long time on MN when you could have done a bit of toast or got the kids cereal. Then left the mess for dh.
Or take a few pics as you have done and show them to him later and tell him to clean up after himself. You’re not a hotel. However, As a previous PP has mentioned it’s all about give and take. We don’t live in isolation, if that’s what you want then you wouldn’t be married with kids.

In the grand scale of things I don’t think this is a big deal to even be here on MN about.
Here’s the ceiling of my kitchen at the moment 🤪🤣 after the builders were working upstairs and the lathe fell off downstairs. We didn’t have time to sort it so just got on with it this morning. I won’t show the rest as it will probably out me. I know this is an extreme example probably but if you all chose to live together, if dh bucks up a bit after you show him the photos then cross fingers you’ll all sort it out.

well its not dirty by my standards, but then Im a bit of a slob and thats not what I would call dirty. Its what I would consider to be a bit slapdash. before the pics came up I was expecting remnants of dried tomato paste on the worktops and a sink full of washing up.

Im guessing her husbands level of cleanliness dont match OPs, and thats a discussion needing to be had between them

But as to whether those crumbs and a bit of food in the sink are a health hazard that prevents preparing other food, Id say no it isnt. Nobody died from last nights crumbs touching their sandwhich. If the grapes fall in the sink, there is nothing intrinsicly poisonous/hazerdous in there. A bit greasy possibly, but nothing that a further second or two under the tap, plus a dry, wouldnt deal with.

If the idea of moving the bits from the sink repulses you, then leave it and ask your DH to do it later. But in preventing your kitchen functioning, then Im afraid YABU

I really only did it to piss people off on here.

That's more than 'a bit grubby' to me.

Thanks for replying, and sorry about your hands! I was worried I was somehow missing a vital step and being slovenly.

aw thanks, @MMMarmite it really is just that the water is really too hot and i hate the feel/smell of my hands after they've touched the dishcloth. I do it if needed in an emergency :)
I can recommend the gloves/hot washing up water thing tho (here's some prime MN content here, folks)

if you slather your hands with hand cream, put on thin cotton gloves under your washing up gloves (works also for general cleaning) the hand cream really does soak in and the heat really makes them all soft and lovely.

That is not a kitchen that is usually very clean- the muck ingrained round the edges and at the back of the hob has not been cleaned in months.

I would just clean up the bits he has left but the areas round the hob would get to me- grim.

Oh, I suspect you immediately let your husband know about the extra 6 minutes he added to your day.

Yes you’d have to clean up a bit first even if it was a quick wipe round as several have suggested. So yanbu.

I can’t cook say dinner in a dirty kitchen because that includes more dishes etc, but I can easily make toast or prepare a bowl of cereal and fruit easily if the kitchen is a bit messy or dirty.

When did that sink last have clean. Your kitchen is skanky 👎

How could you possibly know that?

I think it's a bit unnecessary and grim to leave food in the sink and on the side, bearing in mind an adult is the one who left it - I'd ask my DP if he could make an effort not to do that again as I'd find it offputting.

Would it actually stop me from cooking - no, because there's no reason why it would. I'd use a clean chopping board and saucepans etc to prepare food anyway, not the worktop so it wouldn't affect much in reality, even if I do agree it's a bit offputting.

If as you say, you had a 9am meeting so were short on time, yes I'd have just got on with it, cooked and done a quick clean up afterwards and speak (normally) to my DP about it. I imagine if you have cooked breakfasts most morning then it's a bit par for the course that there'll be mess and a clean will need doing so whoever it is that does it needs to leave more time for a cleanup if you want it clean.

You’re nice.

Post likes these and the ironing ones make more sense of the threads where the OPs have no time for themselves because they're spending their weekends or evenings cleaning. My kitchen rarely looks as clean as these pictures and I'm very much alive to tell the tale! I can't imagine even noticing a few crumbs let alone spending 6 minutes cleaning them up. Of course you could have cooked in it.

Wipe down and crack on. Good grief. Wish that was all to get my knickers in a knot about.