To not feel able to cook in my kitchen because it’s dirty

[WoIsMe]

My DH did the kitchen yesterday after dinner and this is what I find when I go to make my own breakfast and my kids’ lunches. I don’t feel that I can prepare food without cleaning up the kitchen first but I have to get my kids to school and get to a meeting at 9 a.m. while my DH has already gone out to work.

So, AIBU for feeling that I can’t cook in this kitchen without having to clean it first?

Christ, we’re living in a building site at the moment so every time I want to even make tea I have to wipe dust off every surface and it does not bother me. You’re being rather over the top and in no way would spending 7 seconds wiping crumbs off have impacted your timings at all.

I and two of my kids usually have a cooked breakfast such as scrambled eggs or bacon and eggs.

I've just finished that myself and the dust everywhere was a bit irritating. Bear in mind that it will keep settling for a few days after the work has finished so don't do your big clean the day after the workmen leave.

This is the kind of quality info that MN needs to highlight on their front page IMO.

Doesn’t look too bad I would just do a quick wipe. I find it helps to have zones in the kitchen so we have one for preparing meat which is the opposite side to the preparation of salad etc. That’s my only OCD round the kitchen because I had food poisoning once an I am paranoid. However, if DH and teenagers have left loads of dishes and mess I just refuse to start cooking dinner til they’ve sorted it usually does the trick.

But she doesn't actually have to - she could completely ignore it all, whip out a plate or chopping board to sort out lunches, chuck it in the sink, then get him to finish the job later.

It's not about whether or not DH has done a slapdash job - yes he has and yes she can say "oy, do you mind leaving me to finish up your job?"

It's about being able to function in a normal way.

And to the pp who said "I sense there's something more to this" - please don't. If there's something more to it OP should say so at the start. Otherwise it's your standard attention seeking drip-feeding waste of time.

I do a quick spray and wipe before I prepare any food - takes 2 seconds, and for me is just part of getting my environment ready. To make a fuss about the small amount of mess in the photos seems daft to me.

YABU to give it any headspace at all unless there's a big dripfeed coming.

To answer your actual question, I would clean up if it annoyed me visually. It's not clean. But I wouldn't be worried about cooking in it from a hygeine perspective at all, unless raw meat had been cooked the previous meal.

Exactly.

Her DH is a scruffy bugger who can't be arsed to tidy up properly.

OP - YANBU. I wouldn't want to prepare food in a mucky kitchen like that either.

Honestly OP that's not too bad. Tip for washing grapes - put them in a strainer and do it that way so they won't fall into the sink if that bothers you.

A lot of people here are reading far too much into my original post! This isn't a marriage-ending drama. I basically only want people to say whether they would clean up or not before preparing food.

YABU to feel unable to cook/prepare food without cleaning - it's really not remotely bad enough to worry about.

YANBU to think that your DH did a crap job and that he needs to pull his socks up.

Just wipe it down

If the aibu had been ‘should H have done a better job?’id have said yanbu. As you’ve said ‘can I possible manage to prepare food in this hellhole without disinfecting and cleaning for hours?’yabu.

Direct answer: No I wouldn't clean up before making food. My own kitchen if usually far more of a tip and it's been fine, no illness or lives lost! Sometimes I think people take hygiene too far.

I mean it would irritate me that he’s not done those bits, but not enough that it’d stop me cooking/making breakfast/lunches etc. i’d give the side a quick wipe down and tell my OH to come and finish the job but that’s about it.

The sink would piss me off but the sides are just a few crumbs.

Gosh, let it go. There's worse things to be annoyed about.

And no, I wouldn't clean up as you're only going to add to the mess. Make your food, then wipe up

This. I’d be a bit irritated at his crappness in the cleaning department, but saying you don’t feel you can cook in there is decidedly drama lama territory

Tell him how you feel, spend 5 minutes cleaning it up and then cook if it makes you feel better. End of conversation.

I wouldn't have given it a second thought, I'd have just wiped it down and got on with it

Yes, I would clean it up.

If DH thinks he's done a complete job, I would mention it. But I'm not perfect myself and we operate with a fair amount of give and take. I would definitely brush up a few crumbs.

Ultimately, if your standards are higher than his, you're cleaning to a higher standard for your benefit not his, so the onus is on you.

I'm not saying you should clean up after him exactly, but it looks to me like he did 90% of the clean up job after dinner, and missed a few little bits.

How would you feel if you were washing the car and he came out and said "you missed a bit"?