DH ate extra lasagne and didn’t tell me

[Lolabear38]

I’m currently at home with 2 poorly DCs. We are all getting cabin fever so I may be over reacting a little here.

Yesterday I made a big lasagne for our tea. We had it with salad, corn on the cob and garlic bread so it was a substantial meal. There was enough leftover for us to have tonight (planned). I said as much to DH and he said ok fine, he said liked it a lot so was happy to have it again tonight.

I went to bed before DH last night and, unbeknown to me, he had another portion of the lasagne and didn’t say anything to me. Normally not an issue but as I said I was planning on us having it tonight too.

Today has been a hard day with the kids but I thought ‘oh at least dinner is sorted’ except when I went to get the lasagne I was bloody annoyed to see we were one portion down! I hadn’t looked at it all day today as when I put it in the fridge last night there was plenty.

DH was working later tonight so DC and I ate before he got home. I considered giving everyone a smaller portion but then I thought, f$&@ it, we’re having a normal portion and DH can have whatever is left, which is a lot less than he usually would have. He’s now home and very annoyed and thinks I’m selfish and somehow food shaming him for eating the extra last night. He said I should have left him enough, but as far as I’m concerned I did last night!

There is plenty of bread/ baked beans etc. for him to make himself something else but AIBU to be annoyed and not to have left him enough tonight?

You are definitely not being unreasonable! If he was hungry last night he should have made something else to eat. He is the one being selfish here expecting you to have less for tea!

Why do you keep avoiding the point that she was sick?

Why are so many people suggesting that OP should have warned him so he could have picked up something on the way home? She clearly stated that they had plenty of food. Should he be rewarded for greed with fastfood? I don't think that is a very pedagogic approach.

It's not about a bowl of soup. How do you not see that?

Much ado about nothing.

Surely one of you could have eaten an alternative to the lasagne, why so much drama!!

It was one portion down?

That was his portion - he chose to eat it early. He has no right to complain.

Greedy gissie!

The only thing you did wrong was leaving him any at all for a third portion- because a small bit of lasagne and then a different meal at the same time to make it up to a substantial portion is a bit weird. I think the point would have been better made if you hadn't left him anything at all. Its also just less aggressive and more objective -everyone gets 2 portions of lasagne, he had his 2nd portion last night therefore there's none left.

Giving him a little bit is just muddying the waters because it leads him to think well you could have reduced everyone's portions more to give him the same.

To be fair it was a bit piggish of him to have a whole second helping hours after the first one with all the trimmings -he can't have been that hungry, a normal bedtime snack is toast or something not a second dinner!

You have done right & I’d have done the exact same as you.
He ate his portion last night.
Pure greed & if he can’t see what he did wrong he needs to take a long hard look at what he is eating & how he is behaving within the family!

Well quite, and it should obviously have been the person who had already eaten twice as much when the other person had said they intended to keep the rest for tonight.

Yet he was the one being dramatic.

Good question, and it’s the same question OP is asking - why did a grown man have a tantrum about his portion not being there when he’d already eaten it? Why couldn’t he just have something else?

The hysteria is over the responses to the OPs post. Not the OP.

The OPs husband has been called:
A fat pig
A big fat baby
Greedy
Overweight
Gaslighting the OP (ffs)

So yes. Some women on here have been utterly hysterical. Yes the guy was a bit greedy but according to one PP if OP so much TEXT her DH asking him to pick something up for himself as he'd eaten his portion, she would be carrying a mental load.

He ate too much fucking lasagne.
If a man came on here and said 'my wife ate too much lasagne and now there isn't enough to go around for this evening for us and the kids' she wouldn't be called fat, gaslighting, a pig etc.

It's SO obvious so many women in here can't wait to take a swipe at men and are on the edges of their seat waiting for a post to come along to get hysterical about a bloke over some fucking lasagne.

I had 2 helpings of pasta and pesto last night. Oooo shame on me what a fat pig I am. 😂😂

Can you explain why it’s perfectly reasonable for a man to eat his portion of food, then have a tantrum that it’s gone (toddler logic), and then call OP selfish for eating her own portion, just like he had? Can you explain why that’s not him being hysterical?

YANBU at all. It’s fine that he ate his last night, but then he needs to accept there’s less for him today. It’s no different to buying a cake with exactly enough slices for everyone. If you eat yours, fine, but then you don’t get to eat someone else’s if you want more later.

The OP said she considered giving everyone a smaller portion, surely it would have been better to do that as the lasagne was huge anyway, it could have been bulked out with garlic bread, and something for desert.
It’s just making a mountain out of a molehill.
As a previous poster said some women can’t wait for the opportunity to take a swipe at men on here.

They is indeed!

Their picture should be in the Illustrated Dictionary next to the entry for "Twat"

Bulking out would have been cooking, which she specifically didn't want to do. And she might not have had dessert in.

She specifically told him she didn't want to cook tomorrow so was saving the rest of the lasagne. Why should he not have just respected that?

Got to love mumsnet usually the mantra is families and proper couples share everything .None of this me and you otherwise it’s not a committed relationship

until it comes to lasagne it seems 😀

@Zone2NorthLondon 😂

OP should have made it in The Magic Porridge Pot .

I’d have done exactly the same as you.

Always.

But that doesn't mean that Mam has to go without so that Dad can have a portion of food he isn't entitled to.

Why can’t he just have something else?

Just imagining my DH trying to tell me I’m selfish for not making everyone else have less so he can stuff his face after being greedy and selfish. I’d be fuming too, YANBU

Well, good for you.

OP wanted lasagne.

If only she'd cooked the mumsnet magic chicken that feeds 6 folk for 9days.Makes soup,risotto,casserole, sandwiches, and pasta and still yield a few scraps