If you didn’t go to a private school, what do you think about those who did?

[hanginds]

Do you feel they had an unfair advantage? Do you care? Do you think they don’t know about the real world?

I really struggle to connect with colleagues who were privately educated as they seem almost entitled to the job. They seem fearless about finding alternative work if needs be, yet I just don’t have that confidence. I assume it’s their background as it’s the only difference between us in the academic/work context.

How are we bitter for supporting private school, having been to a private school? That makes no sense.

Not much on this thread makes sense. There is obviously a deep bitterness and engrained stereotyping of all privately educated people based on anecdotal stories of interactions with a very small % of those from the elite private schools.
Reverse snobbery in action.

Not necessarily you, I haven't noted individual posters. But some seem terribly upset about me having had a daft idea 30 years ago and others very resentful of opportunities other people have had.

Maybe some people think they haven't got their money's worth and are being defensive about their choices. I don't know.

I've been accused of being bitter and clearly secretly desperate to have been to private school. Which is funny.

I'm old live in Wales. I think folk confuse the hooray Henry types from notable private schools to those educated at private schools which were much cheaper more ordinary,

Upset? Nope, curious as to the motivation behind something that just seems a bit batshit.

And repeatedly saying you’re not bitter and that you’re laughing tends to suggest the opposite. We heard you the first time.

Overpriveleged, completely lacking in world experience and with qualifications well beyond their actual intelligence level as they're coached to high heaven.

Agree with those saying it's immoral, unethical and perpetuates inequality and the only ones likely to disagree are the idiots who say 'so what if I was privately educated ,I've worked hard, if you'd worked as hard as me... Bla bla bla' and that's as a highly educated, well respected professional who moves in these circles and cringes at the lack of awareness of the extreme privilege the privately educated have been raised in.

I am bitter about not going to the Chalet School as well!!!

Elite private school in the UK? No, I know plenty of people who did go to such schools, and I honestly don't feel like I missed out at all!

oddly enough I've never been accused of having a 'chip' on my shoulder by anyone other than posh-ish people. It's weird they way some of them thing we must all be jealous in some way. The reality is I feel sorry for ANYONE who went to boarding school, and a lot of privately educated types 'cos they often have a whole load of other issues going on.

And repeatedly saying you’re not bitter and that you’re laughing tends to suggest the opposite. We heard you the first time.
Absolutely predictable someone would say that. By all means believe what you like. No skin off my nose.

…okay 🤷🏻‍♀️

Totally agree. My dd is another confident, articulate, popular kid who got straight 9s at GCSE and is predicted straight A*s at A-level, currently holding an offer for medicine. Money well saved indeed!

You mean the people you’re hostile towards because they’re ‘posh-ish’ are the the ones to point out that you’re hostile towards them because they’re ‘posh-ish’?

A mystery!

Posted too soon. I've known, Methodist, catholic, etc private schools with small classes. They weren't posh, the aristocracy, nouveau riche, aspiring middle class weren't interested. That's the bulk of private schools to be honest. Crumbly classrooms, but the land to play football, rugby, netball, etc hasn't been flogged off by the council. Kids don't sink without trace in classes of 35 plus. Parents that pay care more if only because expulsion means they're stuck with the problem. So they work with the school.

I think there is often an assumption that people must be jealous. I find it rather baffling.

If I felt that I had missed out in any way as a result of going to a state school, I'd have paid for dd to go private, no question. We only have one dc and we could have comfortably afforded it. I just didn't see the point. My privately educated friends are not any happier than me. They are not better educated. They are not more successful in their careers or relationships etc. I don't honestly see what value a private education would have added, over and above what we are able to facilitate quite easily as parents on top of what the state provides. Plus dd was very clear after looking around the local schools that one of the state options was her favourite.

OK so how about I label all kids from state school as thick chavs who will end up bleeding the state dry on benefits? Because that is the flip side to your statement.
That is NOT my opinion fyi but how does it feel when someone makes a sweeping statement like that?
You are aware that the biggest users of private tutors are those trying to get into grammar schools ie state schools??
As per lot of posters on here you are assuming all private schools are like Eton, when the majority are not. The majority of private school are small, local and not 'prestige' in the way you understand it. Parents come from all walks of life and the children include those on bursaries who pay nothing.
But yes go ahead and continue to perpetuate the gross inaccuracies in your bigoted and prejudiced post.

I mean you can if you like, you'd be wrong but go ahead. It is my experience of the privately educated people I've met through work and socially. 🤷 You don't have to like my opinion.

I'm northern Irish and live in Scotland, I'm not assuming anything about schools being remotely like Eton.

I went to state school. Got 4 A and 7 As at GCSE, 3 As at A-level (before As existed at A level). Went to a Russell Group uni, got on a prestigious grad scheme and earn a fair amount of money now.
I am still choosing to send my children to private school because I think it will be the best thing for them. I don’t care where other people choose to send their children to school, but people feel like they have the right to judge my choice for some reason.

Another 'I've met 5 people who went to private school so I'm an expert' post 🙄

I attended both a state comp and a private school. I wasn't coached anymore in my private school, what made a difference was the lack of disruption in the classroom.

Immoral? Unethical? What nonsense! As I said previously, as parents we all give our children the best we can. I don't deprive my children of healthy nutrition meals, or of a loving calm home just because other children don't have access to those things and arguably both of those things give children more advantage over a private education. It isn't a race to the bottom.

There were videos circulating recently of teenagers from my local comp going around beating up other kids. Videos of bullying in the schools loos whilst onlookers vaped in their masses. Would you be happy to send your children to a school like this?

Urgh the formatting fucked up on my post. It was meant to say 4 A stars at GCSE but the *s made it go bold.

I'm not judging anyone's choices, personally. For those of us who are lucky enough to have the choice, some will choose private and others will choose state, but what we all have in common is that we are picking the best possible option for our children.

If you'd no choice but to send your child to a school like this the school wouldn't be like this. If those with money, power and influence didn't have an option more would be done about the singularly available state schooling. Hence immoral and unethical.

I work in a profession where 90% of those I trained with were privately educated. 🤷 I know a lot of privately schooled people through work, socialising, hobbies, neighbours etc. As I say, I stand by my opinion.

@Forgooodnesssakenow yes possibly you are right. That however wasn't my question. Would you send you own child to a school like this?