DH lost his mind over this

[Sunsetred]

I was in the kitchen with my 3 year old making sandwiches. She was using an adult table knife to spread the cheese spread. My DH walked in and went mad because she wasn't using a plastic knife. I think he's completely over reacted. He's insisting that I've done something really bad by letting DD use a table knife. AIBU to have let her use a table knife at her age?

Have your husband read this thread. He is doing such a disservice to your child by not allowing them to learn life skills.

He’s mad. Once my kids stopped eating puréed food they used metal cutlery. Neither injured themselves.

I couldn't live like that, you don't need another person to tell you that plastic cutlery is for picnics out. I didn't own plastic cutlery or kiddie plates for that matter just used normal stuff from weaning.
It's an issue if your child can't move around in a normal manner, maybe you could show him some development checklists which include using utensils and gross motor coordination.

He'd have just booked his place in the extension foundations if he'd carried on like that here!

ifbyoud let her loose with the machete I could understand, but an ordinary knife WTAF?

idiot.

He should be glad you live in the UK. I was given an earful by my DC's kindy teacher because I hadn't taught him how to cut and prepare an apple with a sharp kitchen knife. Also because I didn't let him out to play alone.

Actually laughed out loud 🤣

He’s being a diva, you’re fine

This reminds me of this bit in Friends. Rachel is pregnant with Ross's child and about to go on a date. Ross has a funny idea about what is 'dangerous'

If he's overreacting like that over so many completely harmless activities, he will do her far more damage than she'd ever be able to do with a table knife.

Thet's not a knoife!

Likewise. Teach them to use things properly. Learn to respect tools and those that use them.

I remember DH giving out when DD was a similar age when I’d given her a dinner knife.

I pointed out it was blunt and I didn’t think I could hurt myself with it if I tried, never mind dd.

He came back with a story about my DBIL finding a dinner knife in the garden when he was about 9 (???) and he threw it into his own shin (?!?!?) while messing about with it.

So DH’s OTT view had been shaped by BIL skewering himself.

What ever did we do in the days before plastic …

I used to teach early years and the school nursery curriculum (3-4yrs) was to cook using small, veg knives and to use simple woodwork tools. Obviously in small groups and supervised, they were fine and we had some with challenging behaviour.

Teaching children to safely use appropriate tools for the job is empowering and important.
At Montessori they teach them how to cut things properly with a sharp knife from a very young age. A blunt or table knife would have more chance of slipping and causing an injury.
A plastic knife teaches nothing at all , only maybe that the adult views the child as stupid and deserving of useless tools to do an inadequate job. I gave mine proper little glasses to drink from once they were old enough to stop chucking them on the floor, and proper functioning things rather than kiddy versions ( nice paintbrushes, grown up modelling materials etc) . It gives them a sense of pride in what they can achieve. Now they’re older and rob all my best perfumes and shampoo of course but that’s life 🤣

@Sunsetred

What are you going to do?

You can't go in with him like this?

irs not about the knife it's about him frightening DD & turning HER into a kid tgats scared of doing anything hen the fact that he's badly undermining you,It cannot carry on.

I've never had plastic cutlery in my home, my kids made it to 19 & 21 with all fingers intact

Tell DH to get a fucking grip - there are far bigger dangers out there than butter knives

OP, your DH’s worry / anxiety / over protectiveness is way over the top. Is it just about your Dd or about other things in life? Would he talk about getting help? It will cause serious issues as your Dd grows older.

I’m with you DH…….if she turns round, drops the knife, it bounces off the floor & shoots up, takes your eye out, your eye falls out onto the work top, your DD faints & falls over, bangs her head on the floor then that’s an emergency right there & a night in A&E.

Goodness me! However does he cope with life! 🤣

He’s being insane. Mine has been spreading her own butter with a basic table knife since 3, maybe even before that! Can’t remember, it’s such a non event.

Tell him to stop being such a ridiculous arse.

😂

What if?!!

And to reframe this another way - how does he think any parents get a mini lie-in as children grow up? It’s because they learn to get up and make their own BUTTERED toast on the weekend. Bonus points if they make you a tea/coffee in bed (when a little older).

Don’t tell him about kettle use until 2030 when he might be ready for that conversation.

It's a tool and she was using it correctly. Your husband needs to get better at recognising risk. There was none here. Otherwise he's going to freak out constantly for the next 15 years!

you are not wrong to be unhappy about his response.

There is protective and then there is your husband. He's going to mess her up.

Do you think he would listen if you tried to talk seriously about it?