To ask this about 55+ year olds?

[Luciasa]

In your opinion, do you think it's unusual for people aged 55 and over to have both their parents -

• alive and living independently?

In the UK? You could probably find the stats. If you mean what’s your opinion then from my personal experience I have 3 friends loose their mums when they were in their 20s so I would guess about 1/3 may be 1/4.

In my experience, yes. Very few of my friends have both parents even fewer are able to live independently or, if they do, not for much longer. My dad died 25 yrs ago, DM has dementia & lives with my sister. DH"s parent are long dead.

DH is 62 and both his parents are still around living in their own home at 91 and 93 still driving and running their garden and allotment !

I don’t think that it is uncommon. I have several friends over 55 with both parents alive and independent.
I’m nearly 69 and have both my parents alive and very independent!

I’d say most people have lost a parent by that age, thinking of the people I know.

Not unusual, but obviously it becomes less common as each year ticks on. Mid-70s isn't usually an age at which most people become incapacitated, and lots of 55 year olds will have parents that age.

I'm mid-40s and only one of my parents is still fit and able to live independently.

Thanks - yes UK. I just wondered this as my own mum when she was 55 had

Both parents still alive and living completely independently

Also - at 55 she still had a child under 18 so - not only were her own parents alive and living independently- they were also well enough to babysit/have me stay with them for a few days

I suppose it’s less likely but does exist. So many factors but does depend how old their parents were when they had them.

20-25yr old parents would be 75-80, many able to live independently

my sis pil both in their 90s, both kids in their 60s
my Dm alive and independent in her late 80s
my mil alive and independent (less so) late 80s too

im mid 50s

My dad was 61 when my grandad passed away and 68 when my grandma went. My mum was 62 when her mum died (no dad). All living independently. So in my life yes. Unfortunately my dad died suddenly last year when I was 36 and he was 71 so I won't have that. I think if you had children in your early 20s (or earlier) when they're 55 you'll only be 75 anyway. So not that old.

No. I had both mine at that age. Their generation married and had children in their late teens and early twenties, so they weren't that old when I was fifty-five. Ten years later, my mum is gone and my dad is ninety.

Wow - I'm not exaggerating when I say I think this is brilliant and amazing - I don't know of many cases personally like this

That's lovely I think!

At 55 I had both,but dad was in a carehome and has since died.
I can only think of one friend over 55 who has both parents alive and independent. Everyone else has lost one or both by now

I think it's quite unusual. My own mum died when I was 36, my dad died when I was almost 40.

I think it is fairly unusual. I am that age. My parents are both well but MIL does 2 years ago and FIL is full care in bed with advanced dementia. Most of my friends of a similar age have lost at least one parent.

This is what I was about to say, there is 20 years between my Nan and mum and me and my mum, but I was 30 having my 1st and 40 having my youngest.

I have one set of very middle class professional friends and one set of working class friends who I grew up with.

As we all approach/ enter our 40s the disparity in our parents health is quite striking. It will be interesting to think about your question when we are 55 OP.

I personally think socioeconomic group matters too

In my friendship group most of them have only one parent or no parents alive. I had lost both of my parents by the time I was 32.

I’m almost that age and have both parents living independently, although they do have careers and health issues. Thinking about my friends, I’d say there’s quite a few I know in a similar situation, but equally, a few with one or both parents deceased.

Carers not careers

I’m 54 and both my parents are alive and living independently. My closest friend is a year older than I and both her parents are alive and living independently. We both have pre-teens who our parents occasionally look after.

Fairly unusual .. but I sound like your mum, I had both my DPs alive, well and living independently when I was 55 ... plus my DS who was born when I was 43. My DF died at 90 but my DM is still living independently & will be 90 in a couple of months (I am 65 now). But amongst my circle of friends not many have DPs left. But one of my DH's friends (aged 64) has both parents still alive and living independently.

Seems to run in families in my opinion... most people I know don't have two parents, but the people who do, seem to also have had their great aunts/grans etc longer too.

Also depends on when the parents had their kids! My gran had my mum at 19, so they had each other for a long time (as luckily they avoided life limiting diseases etc).

I am 55 and my parents are in their mid-80s still in their home and no stairlifts, just adapted bathroom. Also, both of sound mind.

All my friends, bar one or two, have lost one or both of theirs. I feel lucky.

Also, got me thinking about my own parents and how their parents started dying when my parents were in their 40s.