To ask everyone to be grateful for their Mother's Day gifts?

[MyMumsOnMN]

Am I being unreasonable to ask everyone to be grateful for whatever gifts they do/don't get for mothers day tomorrow?

I've seen a few threads on here tonight from selfish cows people expecting their kids to have done a better job and tried harder.

Some people will be dreading tomorrow so if you're lucky enough to be able to spend it with you mum/kids then just be grateful.

My mum passed away this week… I have to get up tomorrow and smile for my very loving children. Would much rather do or have nothing x

That's what I thought

From small children - something homemade and their other parent to help with a cup of tea / toast in bed, should be enough.
From older kids a visit along with flowers/chocs etc or lunch should be enough.

I'm so very sorry for your loss. That's awful.

@Mummapenguin20 sorry for your loss, take care of yourself. 21 years tomorrow since my Mum passed away and the first Mothers Day without my Dad. Agree about the whole gratefulness thing, but its a day that brings lots of emotions to the surface so normally about more.

Totally agree OP. Some people on here are so grabby. My son is away and just looking at the photos of him enjoying himself is a gift enough to me

I rarely spend Mother’s Day with my DD’s now that they’re all adults and living too far away but I’m extremely grateful for the cards they each send me. I also have very fond memories of the cards and other stuff they made when they were at primary school and going to Mother’s Day assemblies.

I'm a single mum and I'm so lucky my mum gets me gifts from the kids and has done for the past 9 years. My youngest has told me she's going to clean the bathroom tomorrow which is the greatest gift! I love to get my mum pressies too as she does so much for us.

I’ve got 4 girls, eldest is 20 and at uni, others teenagers, I won’t get anything for Mother’s Day, not even a card, even though I do so much for everyone and have struggled so much -because I have no DH or DP to make a fuss and the girls are all ND and forget/it’s too much trouble/better things to spend their money on. So yeah it does get a bit grating when people are moaning their gifts/meals/coffee in bed isn’t good enough lol

Yes, it’s a very commercialised day like Valentine’s Day. I’m very surprised at adults on here acting like spoilt children who didn’t get what they wanted for their birthday.

YABU. Agree with the sentiment but why do you think you are important enough to ark this of others?

Haha, I’ll clarify, he looks after her a lot! He asked what I would like for Mother’s Day and this is what I would like 🤷‍♀️ I don’t want presents, we had a very crazy weekend last week for Dds birthday, I just want some chill time. So yeah, although he has her himself a lot, yes I’d say this is a treat because it’s what I’d love right now. When dd ia a little older all I’d want is a little card she’s scribbled in.

Yup of course, it’s very 50 50, it’s just been a long couple of weeks, I don’t want presents, so I just want some chill time. The last few weeks neither of us have had this due to both doing overtime at work and dds birthday so this is all I’d like!

My ex husband is a pedophile who sexually abused my daughter. Tbh, i dont care about gifts. Ive got my kids. Theyre safe! Thats all i need.

I totally agree. The church we went to when I was a child would give out bunches of daffs to children to give to their mothers, and to the rest of the women in the congregation too. Mymum and I would be part of a small group who sorted the bunches every year. I still (40 years on) remember the time my bunch had an extra flower than my friend's so I gave her the extra one, partly as I thought I may have been responsible, partly because my mum knew I loved her so it didn't matter if she got one less, and partly as it seemed the right, and Christian, thing to do.

My mum went ballistic, moaning how I couldn't love her if I could do that to her. I wad confused and upset by her reaction, and still am. My dd is too young to do anything but even when she's older a card will be more than enough. I love her, she loves me, that's all that matters.

I think they should just be grateful for having kids in the 1st place

It's usually important to people who don't feel appreciated the rest of the time. Don't tell others how they should feel, you don't walk in their shoes.
I will be working tomorrow and I'm grateful that one of my kids is on shift with me. I don't care what I do or don't get. I do however feel let down often at Xmas / on my birthday but not by my kids. I wouldn't feel this way if I felt appreciated the rest of the time.

Some people will have legitimate complaints.
You don’t get to tell them they can’t have feelings because at least they have kids, or a mum, or whatever your issue is.

Mine’s a useless sack of shit and I was taken into care as a result.

Still not going to tell other people to be grateful.

Some people are living in the Ukraine war zones, and children are starving in Africa.

Doesn’t mean nobody else can complain about something, ever.

Sometimes the right thing isn’t to suck it up and be grateful… and we should stop socialising women that way.

💐so sorry.

I don't think social media helps. Lots of people posting their Mother's Day gifts online for all to see. It seems to be that they feel this is their worth. Like a competition.

Personally I'd be happy with a lay in. I don't care what people think on social media. So you got a Mulberry handbag? Good for you. I got a lay in, coffee and biscuits in bed.

I saw my eldest son last weekend and he gave me flowers and a card I have not opened yet. I got a card in post from DD today and youngest son who still lives at home told me she put money in his account to get me flowers but will wait until other ones die first. Youngest son taking me to breakfast tomorrow morning. I love a good breakfast out. Foster son will have a card for me and usually gets me chocolates or perfume. I am always very happy with my gifts and cards. I just wish my own Mum was still alive. I've sent MiL a Moonpig card she will know I picked it because it has nice words in and DH always used to get her a plane or funny one. Seeing her next weekend and will give her flowers then.

There is always a point in people's lives when they look back and realise time is the most valuable gift of all, you cannot buy it. Often by then its almost too late.

I dont ask for gifts, I ask for time. Time to spend doing something together, or a long phonecall for a chat. That is what is most valuable at least to me.

In a world where people are so busy its easy to just order a gift online or pick something up. Whats harder is making time to see people or to chat to them and tell them how much they appreciate you etc.

So when someone I care about makes time for me I treasure it more than anything.

Its shame some people find value from material things

Mother's Day is so painful for those who have lost their mum or are nc with them or have lost a child or are infertile...I would not miss it if it didn't happen ..along with Father's Day, Valentine's Day etc .. I have 2 lovely kids who have drawn me cards and a DH who will have organised a gift(s)..I will spend the day with family, but I have lost a child and had miscarriages -there were many years that it hurt.

Ahh that's very hard Mummapenguin, good luck with tomorrow.

I understand some people's disappointment. Maybe they just don't feel like feeling grateful.