Asking staff to rinse toddler plate

[leggingsandasweatshirt]

I am extremely hormonal so potentially being unreasonable, but interested to see if others think this is a reasonable request or if I am over stepping:

We were out for lunch today and I brought a suction plate for DS (almost 2) because he is likely to launch a regular plate. When we'd finished I realised I'd run out of nappy bags so didn't have anything to put the dirty plate in inside my bag.

I explained this to the waitress and apologised for being a pain and asked if it was possible for someone to give it a quick rinse so I could put it in my bag without covering everything in gravy.

She looked at me like I'd just shit on the table and responded she was trying to clear the plates. I was mortified that I had clearly offended her and said it didn't matter. My step mum then suggested I rinse the plate in the sink in the toilet which I hadn't thought of, so I then went and did that.

I have asked restaurants to do this on occasion before - am I being an entitled wanker or is this a reasonable request?!

OCD does tend to impact on the lives of sufferers. I’m delighted for you that the lives of people with invisible illnesses is beyond your comprehension and imagination - although I couldn’t imagine a life as restricted in awareness of the myriad of illnesses that affect many peoples day to day lives as that

But I guess we are all different. Although I am perfectly capable of enjoying day trips without visiting the attractions bathroom facilities. Holidays are also now possible as one can book accommodation with a private bathroom, glove up and bleach it before use - which isn’t an option with shared public restrooms. It’s amazing how beneficial years of therapy can be in retraining ones brain. Super fun how my hard won level of freedom after years of intensive treatment is your idea of life limiting, guess. I should work harder at that.

This.

Mind you there are a lot of entitled people on MN who think it's okay to talk in the cinema or allow their kids to play annoying games on tablets, so I'm not surprised you've had so many people supporting you. It's like in the office when you're doing an important piece of work and someone interrupts you to ask you to photocopy something when it's not your job. Also, it's interrupting you from doing the job you're actually paid for. It's an entitled request because you could easily have done it yourself and you're interrupting the work of someone who's already busy.

I can tell you're entitled because you're ignoring everyone who says you're unreasonable but feeling validated by those who agree with you.

While I wouldn’t ask, as I’m conscious of not giving staff more work, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask. As lots of waiters have said they would be fine with such a request. Like you said you normally have a way of doing it and just asked without thinking of alternatives.

Some of the replies are so nasty over just a non issue. I mean if you were so entitled then why would you normally bring a bag to put it in?

YABU. Wipe the plate with a napkin or baby wipe or go into the Ladies and rinse it

Someone here is being an entitled CF. I kind of suspect that it's not the OP.

tunamayo81
Yes, Like I said then, a concentration camp! FYI our children should’ve fear us.
If you think a child at that age throwing is bad discipline you have no idea about child development.

And this, people, is why many are choosing to avoid family eateries these days. Parents who just allow their dcs to act how they want, at the expense of others who should have the right to quiet enjoyment of their meal without having something randomly thrown at them. If your child doesn't cope well in this kind of environment, then don't take them there and inflict their behaviour on others. Wait till they're older when they can follow parental guidance.

I've often asked for my toddler's plate to be rinsed in restaurants and they have always been happy to oblige (although I have lost cutlery this way). YANBU. She was being very rude.

YANBU, it wouldn’t have hurt her just to help you out.

I’ve done this in the finest hotels in the world. Good customer service is about making guests feel comfortable. The waitress was a lazy cow. YANBU.

Wipe it all into the bin in the loo?

Take it outside and find a bin and wipe it there?

There is always an alternative to making a mess.

And I bet you don’t tip yet expect to be treated like a princess.

I love how you said wanker because it sounds like you're a really down to earth person.

But seriously who cares? Don't sweat it

I think I'd just get up and rinse it in the toilet sink myself

Why would anybody lack the imagination to see that many toddlers may knock/drop/throw things off a table? I mean, I don’t lack the imagination, so I can’t see why anyone else would.

Sweet Jesus this is straying so far from the point it’s painful! The OP took a suction plate for this very reason. And anyway, moving a plate away isn’t discipline, it’s simply a practical solution to prevent the action occurring, just as using a suction plate is. What’s your actual point?

Tbh I'd gone and washed it myself. It's not the restaurants property.

I agree with this, from someone who’s actually read the OP and isn’t using the thread as an opportunity to show what a better parent they are or just have a go at the OP.

I would just wipe with a napkin, wipe off the worst and wrap.in another napkin or the child's bib (presumably you had a bib if he's that messy). I think asking them to wash up your plate, dry it and return it is too big an ask , especially if it's busy. The waitress shouldn't have been rude but I can see why she didn't like the request

I used to be a waitress when I was in my late teens. I would have happily obliged. I often provided hot water in a jug for warming bottles as aswell. I'm now a mother of two and have mostly had positive experiences of staff being kind and helpful. But I live in a quiet part of Scotland where people do tend to be more friendly and relaxed.

it’s so insignificant I wouldn’t have even asked a bunch of strangers what they think…..

I always tip where service isn’t included. Most hotels I stay nowadays include an 18% service charge so there is no need to tip as well which I much prefer.

Back to the OP: the clue is in the name ‘hospitality industry’. It’s the wait staff’s job to be hospitable and she wasn’t.

As a waitress if I had been really busy it is very annoying as yet again you’re being asked to do something you’re not paid and probably not tipped to do on top of all the other pressure. But I would still have smiled and said no problem.

Not entirely unreasonable but I wouldn’t have even thought of asking staff to do it when I could take it to the toilets myself. Why you didn’t think of that is beyond me.

Personally I would not of asked ,
I would however explained I had forgotten to bring a plastic bag to put it in ,
and asked if they had something you could use , or politely asked for some paper napkins

I wouldn't have asked never did if I took my own weaning set. Just used to give a wipe with napkins or some tissue. What if it was accidentally broke? Would you expect them to replace it?