Sitting in a reserved seat on a train

[SummaLuvin]

AIBU to think there is nothing wrong with sitting in a reserved seat on a train providing you move quickly and without fuss if the booker comes along?

I always look for an unreserved seat, but if there isn’t one I take my chances. Frequently the person who reserved it never shows up - whether they miss the train, can’t get to the seat as it’s so busy, or can’t be bothered to find their seat as it’s quiet… If no-one ever sat in these reserved seats then on busy trains the aisles and areas between carriages would be even more crowded, so I see it as more of an issue for them to be left vacant. But some people seem to think it’s a faux pas to ever sit in a seat that is reserved. What’s the general consensus?

moonpixel
That's not at all what you said earlier...

Now try looking at my whole post to the poster I was replying to (which is the post you've selectively quoted from 🙄)

Post I was replying to and quoted

Let's say a train calls at Atown, Btown, Ctown and Dtown.

If a seat is reserved from Atown and you get on at Atown, it's rude to immediately sit in that seat and force someone to have a confrontation with you about why they should sit in a seat they've paid for. If there are no seats and you hang around until the train has moved off, if it's still vacant after 15 minutes, the owner probably didn't get on, and you can claim it, but keep an eye open for someone who just got on the wrong carriage and has been slowly making their way over.

If a seat is reserved from Atown and you get on at Btown, and there are no signs of occupation, it's fair enough to sit in it, being mindful that the rightful owner of that seat might actually be on the train, and just have gone to another carriage to buy a coffee.

If a seat is reserved from Ctown and you get on at Atown, you can sit in it, but you should ideally move into another seat before it gets to Ctown (if there are other seats available) or at the very least, have all your stuff gathered up, so you're ready to move as soon as someone gets on at Ctown and eyes up your seat.

I'd only sit in reserved seats that I knew weren't being used, and only then, only if I couldn't find a wholly unreserved seat.
You have to be really mindful that not everyone can communicate well or likes communicating with strangers, and your convenience does not trump theirs.

My reply
Agree with your top parts, but I don't think it's reasonable for people to have to exhaust wholly unreserved seats just in case someone gets on later and doesn't want to identify their seat.

If someone gets on at C town, it would be unreasonable of them to object that someone from A town is sat in their chair because they don't want to say that's their seat when they get on at C Town. The train operators don't expect everyone to leave seats free just in case someone doesn't want to talk to someone else

Hmmm. Doesn't sound like I'm against being ready to move does it? Full marks for selective quoting though.

bucketloadofcats
Some common sense like that would be good on our trains. We don't tend to get those sorts of announcements, though occasionally we get one saying reserved seats are in carriages A,B,C which I like.

In reality we get a mix of an above seat notification saying "this seat might be reserved for all or part of the journey", a display above the seat saying which stations a seat is reserved between.
It's always surprises me how many reserved seats were empty from several stations back. Before this thread I used to think people must have money to burn on train fares and not turn up but posters up thread explaining that when they book tickets with work they have to reserve a seat even on an open tickets has made sense of that for me.

I read that as reversed 😆 in which case I’d puke!

I look for one reserved from a previous station if there are no unreserved seats left. I have often had a reserved seat and found someone in it though. In that case I look for an unreserved one nearly or ask them to move if I can’t find one.

@LolaSmiles

I quoted that part be due I was commenting on that example. It's not taking anything out of context and no amount of response will alter what you said.

@LolaSmiles

yesterday at 17.42 you say
If someone gets on at C town, it would be unreasonable of them to object that someone from A town is sat in their chair because they don't want to say that's their seat when they get on at C Town. The train operators don't expect everyone to leave seats free just in case someone doesn't want to talk to someone else.

then later at 20.23 you say
What I dispute is the idea that someone should only be sitting in a seat reserved later in a train's schedule if theyve exhausted the options that are unreserved for the train's whole journey.

So in your later post you gloss over your incredibly rude remarks because they don't want to say that's their seat -and The train operators don't expect everyone to leave seats free just in case someone doesn't want to talk to someone else. and come up with the argument
"oh ,I'm only objecting to the idea of walking up and down the train before I sit in a reserved seat "my words

and you're accusing others of selectively quoting ?
Away with you .

I haven't read the whole thread but for what it's worth I hate it.
I hate having to hover uncomfortably while the seat stealer acts all surprised and slowly and begrudgingly moves seat. Book your own fecking seat! Also please consider that not everyone will approach someone who it sat in their seat. My son has ASD and whoyld rather stand the whole journey than interact with a stranger. It's basic good manners and common courtesy to not sit in seats that someone has taken their time to book.

I haven't heard it very often, admittedly, but it's very helpful when it does happen.

I tend to book open returns when staying with sick relatives, because they're cheaper than two standard singles, and I don't always know what date I'll get to leave. I can't buy fixed tickets, because things are too chaotic to commit to a fixed train. Reservations are free in this country, so I always take the reservation for the return, even if I'm not sure if I'll get on that train.

I think most of the time when someone is missing a reservation, it's because it's part of an open return, or it was a super cheap advance ticket that they booked just in case (so they're burning a tenner, as oppose to several hundred pounds). Sometimes, it can make more sense to buy a couple of super cheap fixed price tickets rather than a more flexible standard one, as it still works out cheaper even if you waste one.

Really, the only takeaway is that train fares are ridiculous in this country, and that's why people do ridiculous things. When you into split ticketing - and the sort of journeys that are actually more expensive with a break - it's just nonsensical.

@amberedover @moonpixel I took it in a similar way, but a poster is allowed to change their mind. I'd like to think with the amount of arguing that goes on in AIBU, people do occasionally shift their perspectives because of it!

The last time I arranged a school trip, we did it by train. Group bookings allocated seats in the same carriage - and when we got on, several of our booked seats were taken.
Most people very quickly vacated when the students asked... except one bloke who decided that he was more important than we were. He tried to argue the toss with me about why he should have the seat because he was already in it. He did eventually move.

I would only enforce my reservation if I couldn't find an alternative, too. Or if I'd booked a reservation next to a travelling companion, and someone hogging my seat meant we couldn't travel together.

It's not the easiest thing to do, but I have in the past for example, agreed with a friend living at Atown that we'll both get the same train to Ctown, and I'll join them at Btown, because I live nearer Ctown than they do. I think this used to be possible with certain train operator websites (not all of them) and where it wasn't, I could get a (free) manual reservation for the seat I wanted by going to a ticket office.

Apart from the lack of common courtesy... who wants to be trapped in the middle of someone else's school trip? Even if I was sitting in an unreserved seat, if I knew there were free seats elsewhere in the train, I'd be tempted to flee!

He wanted a table. Tough shit, mate. I've booked all of the tables in the carriage. For my teenagers. I find teenagers endlessly amusing but why a stranger would want to sit with them, I don't know.
He was still huffing when I went round with their train snacks. He was not offered one.

You can't always book seats. There's a service I was on Friday and the reverse yesterday. You can't book seats on that one

@bucketloadofcats - good point ,though if lola had said she'd changed her view I'd not have posted .
By the way - much credit for introducing the Astation ,Bstation ,Cstation concept!

for @MrsHamlet for finding teenagers endlessly amusing and for teaching them .I see them and am overawed by their youth ,energy and the sheer NOISE.

I have a friend ,retired teacher,who is like you .Sees a bunch of hooded ,dark coated teenagers and makes fond remarks about them to me .As opposed to throwing her hands up in horror and fleeing for fear of being mugged .
Long may people like you exist .

@SouthCountryGirl if no seats are bookable then the issue of someone sitting in the seat you've reserved (which is the point being debated ) doesn't arise .

Rather than act defensively surely you just own it and say 'actually yes, I see that some people can't do that' - the poster in question actually made some vile remark previously as well, so I'm dubious to say the least.

I'm often wrong but I'm happy to admit it and apologise when that happens.

They were loudly discussing Shakespeare on the way home... hoodies and all!

Oh wow! Teenagers are thinking human beings ! Almost like us but with energy and enthusiasm.Who knew .

Er... I did. Which is why I enjoy teaching them so much.

@bucketloadofcats - the trouble is people are polite and sit in other seats to avoid moving others. Then the train hits a busy commuting stretch and it’s mayhem. My train home is always jam packed and there are people trying to find their original booked seat which they didn’t sit in because they were being polite, only now there are people standing in the aisles and it’s a bunfight.

If there were no unreserved seats I would absolutely sit in an empty seat and move when asked. The train company will also tell you this allowed.

There are often seats which clearly haven't been taken, and so long as you're willing to move, especially for, eg families with kids and older people. I imagine it's more likely to be a problem with seats reserved from a station after the first one - the places I've travelled to and from most with my kids are Leeds, Deal and Kings Lynn, all usually end of the line as are Kings Cross/St Pancras, and Stockport which is not the first station on the route.

The most difficult one was a train on which an elderly couple who weren't on the right train clearly thought we'd taken their seats. I think they probably had the same seat numbers reserved on a train which was due to leave Kings Cross about the same time or 3 minutes later - Leeds and York/Newcastle travel on the same route up to Doncaster but are usually not the same trains. I knew we did have our seats reserved and my boys were still pretty young and it would have been very hard for us to find other seats where we could share food and keep them entertained as prepared for before the journey, and I wouldn't take a chance on other seats rather than my own reservations in those circumstances. It's the kind of thing which makes it so important that there are staff at both ticket offices and platform entrances/to help everyone get on the train.