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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Sitting in a reserved seat on a train

174 replies

SummaLuvin · 09/03/2023 20:59

AIBU to think there is nothing wrong with sitting in a reserved seat on a train providing you move quickly and without fuss if the booker comes along?

I always look for an unreserved seat, but if there isn’t one I take my chances. Frequently the person who reserved it never shows up - whether they miss the train, can’t get to the seat as it’s so busy, or can’t be bothered to find their seat as it’s quiet… If no-one ever sat in these reserved seats then on busy trains the aisles and areas between carriages would be even more crowded, so I see it as more of an issue for them to be left vacant. But some people seem to think it’s a faux pas to ever sit in a seat that is reserved. What’s the general consensus?

OP posts:
murasaki · 09/03/2023 20:59

Fine as long as you move immediately when asked, as you say.

LolaSmiles · 09/03/2023 21:01

It's fine. A seat is only reserved for certain parts of the journey. The operators don't expect it to stay empty for 70% of the journey just because someone's reserved a stretch of it.

tulippa · 09/03/2023 21:03

No issue as long as you move straight away if asked to. It's common for reserved seats to sit empty all journey so you might as well try.

Badbudgeter · 09/03/2023 21:03

I think it’s fine if you move when asked. I’m guilty of sitting in seats that have been reserved for later bits of the journey. I pack everything up ready to leave quickly in case they get on but if not I’ll stay on.

AlisonDonut · 09/03/2023 21:04

I always used to look for one that had been reserved from the stop I got on at, but if one was booked from the previous stop and empty then I'm in there.

Flamingogirl08 · 09/03/2023 21:04

I guess it's not really an issue although I do hate it when I have to ask somebody to move

StreamingCervix · 09/03/2023 21:06

I think it’s fine a couple of moments once the trains departed the starting destination of the reservation, they didn’t use their allocation then so it’s a free seat.

I do wish trains were a bit more like planes in their seat allocation, and offered a premium charged seat reservation where you can actually choose your coach/area etc but I also understand why the logistics of that would be too challenging. But what I often find is a train will cram reservations in to one or two carriages (often times the designated ‘quiet’ coach as well for some bizarre reason) that create a really unpleasant environment where they expect people to be crammed in for the whole journey.

I regularly travel on a 3+Hr journey that has 10 coaches, probably about 800 seats. At quiet times when I do travel there may be 250/300 travellers, why would anyone want to commit to sitting next to a stranger all cooped in when you could walk to the furthest carriage back and be sharing the whole coach with half a dozen people?

ChateauMargaux · 09/03/2023 21:06

I also hate having to ask.... worse when people ask to see my reservation when they know it's not their's..

JudgeRudy · 09/03/2023 21:08

I'm with you on this one...also the reserved sign might be for 4 stations ahead and you're getting off in 2. The key though is you move quickly and without fuss. Just like darting out between traffic you only do it if you're 100% sure you physically able.

donttellmehesalive · 09/03/2023 21:08

I usually look for one that was reserved from the station I'm embarking at, or a previous station. That way you know straight away if they haven't showed up.

If it's reserved from a station further on in my journey I might sit there but definitely be ready to move if asked.

Original poster
SummaLuvin · 09/03/2023 21:10

donttellmehesalive · 09/03/2023 21:08

I usually look for one that was reserved from the station I'm embarking at, or a previous station. That way you know straight away if they haven't showed up.

If it's reserved from a station further on in my journey I might sit there but definitely be ready to move if asked.

This is a good idea. Unfortunately the line I travel on most has a simple "reserved" or "available". And more and more frequently on the other route (I think on Avanti) all seats have had the helpful message "may or may not be reserved for all or part of the journey"

OP posts:
CC4712 · 09/03/2023 21:13

I personally try to find an unreserved seat- even if it means walking up and down.

Not everyone feels comfortable confronting someone sitting in their seat and asking them to move. It can feel confrontational and you never know how the other person will react.

LolaSmiles · 09/03/2023 21:23

Not everyone feels comfortable confronting someone sitting in their seat and asking them to move. It can feel confrontational and you never know how the other person will react
They might not want to, but why should a seat remain free for a whole trip just in case someone might not want to say "excuse me, that's my reservation" when they get on?

I'd certainly be willing and ready to move quickly, but I'm not walking up and down the train avoiding any seat that someone might have reserved at some point in the train's 9 hour trip.

StreamingCervix · 09/03/2023 21:26

SummaLuvin · 09/03/2023 21:10

This is a good idea. Unfortunately the line I travel on most has a simple "reserved" or "available". And more and more frequently on the other route (I think on Avanti) all seats have had the helpful message "may or may not be reserved for all or part of the journey"

Show quote history

Oh that does sound like a shoddy system then op, you have my sympathies.

Great western have a pretty decent system of showing a red light with the actual joining/departing station listed, amber light for if the joining reservation is part way through the route and green if it’s available. Of course, that’s when it’s working, and it can often be a ‘no reservations on this service, even though we sold it to you’ which descends into carnage and lots of indignant, cross people.

Notellinganyone · 09/03/2023 21:32

I think it’s fine. I’ve been commuting for 18 years now and would say that some people are too timid to ask others to move. It happened today and the woman in question stood rather than ask the person occupying her seat to leave. I’m pretty assertive if someone is in my booked seat. Some people are also really awkward about moving even if they haven’t bothered booking.

Lcb123 · 09/03/2023 21:42

Fine as long as you move immediately if the person who reserved it comes along. I travel a lot by train and there’s always so many reservations not used.‘I tend to wait until train leaves to get settled
though!

Thelondonone · 09/03/2023 21:43

I wouldn’t have a problem with you being in my seat, I’d politely ask you to move. However, lner allow you to reserve seats until 5 mins b4 departure so I think everyone should do this instead!

RainLover · 09/03/2023 22:01

See no issue in this. If someone was in my reserved seat I’d ask them to move. So frequent for people to miss a train they’ve booked a seat on, that it’s worth a shot.
But then, I’m not the moral guide. I made eye contact yesterday with someone in a reserved seat that immediately said “sorry” and ran off. I sat down. I had no reservations.

PyongyangKipperbang · 09/03/2023 22:44

Happened to me today actually!

DD and I were travelling back from seeing DD2 at uni and there was a family sitting in our reserved seats (and someone elses too presumably). Tried to explain and the woman resolutely insisted that they were her seats, there must have been a double booking and as they got there first, they werent moving. Tough.

Looked at the info and sure enough, booked to our destination not hers but no, folded arms, turned away with a "Not my problem love". Which I admit did piss me off so while I might have let it go as a mistake or double booking and made the best of it, I thought "Fuck this your rude cow"
When the conductor came along I asked her to help, we were sat in someone elses reserved seats across the aisle from our seats, and only had 2 stops to sort it or we were in effect going to be passing the problem a long to another poor bugger. It was a v long journey too.

Conductor goes to woman who kicks off, triumphantly throws down tickets to "prove" the double booking and stands there with a smug look on her face. Conductor says "Yes, you are sitting in the right seats that were reserved for you......" another smug look at me " ...on the 9.25 train. This is the 11.35 train and you are sitting in these ladies seats". You could have heard a pin drop! Then the justification starts, she didnt book the tickets, her friend did so it wasnt her fault, to which she was told that it wasnt our fault either. "Well we are here now, what are we supposed to do?!" In the end the conductor apologised to us (which smug face didnt do, didnt even acknowledge us after she had been told we were in fact in the right) and said that she would sort us out with better seats elsewhere as smug face was "refusing to move" said loud enough in the by now silent carriage for everyone to hear, I assume they were all eavesdropping as I damn well would have been! Dont know what happened but she did say that she would have to go back to Smug Face to "sort out your tickets for this journey" implying that their tickets were specific to the earlier train and not transferrable. Most enjoyable it was even if we did end up crappier seats as it turned out (booked table seats and got coach seats....ah well). I suspect that Smug Face will have had to pay £££ for new tickets because it was a long journey that we paid a lot for even at a massive discount through work and booked well in advance. Their journey was even longer than ours so......

ZoeyBartlett · 09/03/2023 22:47

Fine I think. When I travel for work my return is open BUT the system makes you pick a train and gives a reservation even though highly unlikely it's going to be used. I always assume many other seats are similarly auto reserved.

CinnamonsWake · 09/03/2023 22:56

I think it’s fine as long as you move quickly and politely when asked. Usually if you look at your ticket and the seat you don’t even need to ask before the person offers to move, in my experience.

When travelling for work I often have a seat automatically reserved for me but sometimes catch an earlier or later train. I’d feel awful if that seat was then empty while people were standing! I’d just assumed someone would sit in it.

moonpixel · 09/03/2023 22:58

I wouldn't be able to ask you to move. I have sat in the vestibule more times then I care to remember because my seat has been occupied

Perhaps if you pay attention to anyone walking to the seat at the station that it is booked from, then move?

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 09/03/2023 22:59

I think on trains where the reservations are clear it’s incredibly rude - we had people arguing the other day that they’d got there first even though the seats clearly said “reserved from X to Y” and we got on at X.
They also changed 5 mins after we left X to “available from X if unoccupied” so there’s no excuse on those trains imo.

When it’s not a clear system like that it’s fair enough.

evemillbank · 09/03/2023 23:10

Sorry but YABU. Not everyone will be comfortable enough to approach and ask you to move and so you are being unfair.

maddening · 09/03/2023 23:13

The electronic ones show where they are reserved to and once they are past the stop they are reserved from and then switch to show that you can sit there if unoccupied