What % of your income from work do you spend because of work?

[verdantverdure]

AIBU to ask you what percentage of your income from working you spend because you are working?

A younger family member has asked me to cast an eye over her sums and it looks to me like she can't afford to go back to work after maternity leave.

Once you add up nursery and the commute, she's already running at a loss even before she buys new work clothes to fit her post pregnancy figure and current norms at her workplace.

Not including convenience foods such as pre chopped veg or a bought in lasagne etc so she can get dinner on the table soon after she gets home, or takeaways for the nights she's too shattered to do that.

A cleaner do her weekends can be family time not housework time?

Treats to cheer her up because life is a bit of a grind?

Stuff like hair, make up and nails so she looks "groomed" at work?

What about you?

What percentage of your income from working do you spend because you are working?

I spend nothing.

For most people I would think the costs are just childcare (if you have a child of the age to need it) and commuting. Everything else is a choice.

Actually you could argue that even childcare and commuting are choices. (As in, you could choose a job close to home/to live where there were jobs. And you can work while your child is asleep or there is someone else to look after them). I'd certainly agree that these are not choices that are necessarily palatable or available to all.

Everything else is optional.

A hell of a lot less since WFH

So he's at work too, his choice, and the lifestyle costs are 50% his to shoulder as well.

Nothing.
I usually eat works food if I'm there in the evening or I take lunch in. I would be eating lunch anyway so no additional cost.
I get my hair and but make up but probably wear less make up for work than on my days off.
No extra clothes are required.
I often cycle or walk to work.
I've never had a cleaner in my life and yet with two children and working full time we managed to keep the house clean, tidy and organised. It just needed a routine.

OP have you factored in the benefits (often priceless) of her returning to work?

• pension contributions
• ability to have a life away from home/kids/husband
• financial ability which makes her less dependent on her husband
• the fact that if she wants or needs to return to work after X years as a SAHM she may struggle

Not saying this is 100% true of every SAHP but absoloutley should be measured when deciding what to do. It's very "simplistic" to just say

'Cost of working' > 'salary'

Have you used 100% of the childcare bill in your calculations?

She says nails in particular are a work grooming standard and not one she would bother with otherwise.

She hasn't spent any money on hair cuts or make up on Mat Leave but would have to for work.

Remember jobs often come with perks like death in service benefits, she will need life insurance if she doesn’t work to replace that.
If she’s not married then definitely look at factoring in cost of marriage of civil partnership if she’s going to give up work. Things like pension sharing if they split in a few years doesn’t apply to cohabitation. CAB Has a decent guide marriage v cohabitation.
Most work places are more casual these days - nails, hair etc are likely to be fine as she wants anyway.

honestly I’m sorry but your post did make me laugh. I agree with pretty much every post. Nails, hair, ready meals, cleaner are not costs I would consider.
Cleaner is mentioned so much on here but reality is most of us that work FT don’t have one.
To say your friend is putting that much thought into the decision I’m not sure why - pension, future career etc is not being considered. Also childcare should be seen as 50% from her wage.

What the hell is this person's job?!
Unless she works on the Clarins counter at John Lewis (or similar), she's talking nonsense!

She wouldn't have to

She would choose to

Swapping to a less strict/groomed workplace or job allowing wfh sounds like it would cut costs.
I can’t imagine where she works if there are nail polish requirements.

Is being "groomed" an actual work requirement or one she is putting on herself?

If it's actually written into staff policies, I think I'd be looking for another job.

Exactly 0% of my salary is spent on "work related" costs. Primarily because I WFH so don't have to factor in things like a commute. But also because I don't recognise most of the costs you list as being work related. Personal grooming and buying clothes are just costs, irrespective of working or not. Likewise, having a cleaner. Not something I'd ever want to do despite working full time, so I still clean my own home (split with DH).

£3 a day on breakfast club

It's absolutely fine if she doesn't want to go back to work.

If that's their choice as a family then it's a completely valid choice.

But you can not say that nails and a cleaner are a work expense.

Not including convenience foods such as pre chopped veg or a bought in lasagne etc so she can get dinner on the table soon after she gets home, or takeaways for the nights she's too shattered to do that.

Is she going to be a miner on 12 hours shofts or something.

This is just making a problem where one doesn't exist really

What exactly does she do for a living? I've worked in some very corporate places and never needed to do anything special with my nails. Unless she's in the entertainment business or something like that(?), she is talking shite.

So she likes her nails done at work. Fair enough. But it's not going to be a requirement.

The question isn’t “is it financially worthwhile to go back to work?” it’s “is there any way to preserve my career so I don’t lose momentum, and will keep the same earning capacity and pension savings in the future. When my DH left his job to care for the children, we were precisely £10 a week worse off.

Now DS is 4, nursery costs us £112 a month for 3 days a week. Even taking off petrol at £40 a month, I'm quite obviously very much in the black with wages. It's worth sucking it up between 1 and 3.

What kind of job is she doing?! Childcare commuting and the inital outlay for office clothes are her only cost here. Hair makeup nails, help around the house and convenience foods are her choice. If she goes back she and her partner need to take on the household 50/50. Food can be prepped at weekends/night before. It’s hardly a chore to pop some meat in the oven and a jacket potatoe etc whilst you shower or flip the hoover round whilst partner does bed time etc. most people take packed lunch, breakfast and coffees etc to work.

She hasn't spent any money on hair cuts or make up on Mat Leave but would have to for work.

Just because she hadn't had a haircut in the last year doesn't mean that if she didn't go back to work she'd never have it cut again! Is she planning to just grow and grow it forever if she's not working?

Is she single? Nursery fees, cooking meals and cleaning are usually shared is there are two adults in a household.

I do not recognise a lot of expenses you list as work expenses, but I am not highly groomed in a top job. I would do the same amount of minimal grooming whether I worked or not.
We do not have a cleaner and we cook.
The only thing I count as work costs are commuting - currently tiny as I rarely go into the office, and heat at home during the day which is obviously much more. No need for childcare for the teenagers.

I’m interested to know what line of work this would be. I assume men have the same expected standards. Is that so? Keeping your nails clean is a given. Is that the “grooming”? Not much else.