To think its time to get rid of personal titles ie. Miss, Mrs, Ms?

[jumpingbean1810]

I was ordering something in a shop the other day and the assistant, in her 20s, was putting my details into their system. She said, I hate asking this, I find it so embarrassing but are you Miss, Ms or Mrs? I replied I'm Miss. I was there with my daughter so in that one exchange I'd divulged I was a single, unmarried parent. It's not information the shop needs for me to order a lamp. And if I was a man, they'd be Mr and none the wiser as to marital status. I know I could say Ms but does any married woman really use Ms? So Ms just ends up sounding like a Miss with issues. It got me thinking why do we need personal titles, how often are they really used anyway? Can they not just be scrapped from form filling? With the increasing desire by the younger generation to not even be defined by gender, identifying women by their marital status feels so outdated. It's international women's day tomorrow and in the spirit of embracing equity, isn't it time we abolished women being defined by marital status?

Titles don’t say anything. I’m a ‘miss’ and have been married for 16 years.

What a non-issue. Have you nothing better to worry about.
I have news, you will be judged whhicheverctitle you care to use or not use.
The world is going to hell in a handcart and you are jumping up and down over titles, demanding they are dropped. Well, I you can do what you want, but get back in your pram about forcing another unnecessary idiocy on the rest of us

Another married Ms here - I agree introducing it as the only option organically over time would create an equal footing with the use of Mr.

In France, the title Mlle nom longer exists. Officially. Think it was last year it was 'removed'. Seems daft to call a 7 year old Madame, but they often have strange ideas in Paris.

Mr is an abbreviation of Mister, as Miss and Mrs are of Mistress, if you think of the Mayor of Casterbridge by Thomas Hardy.

Both, like the French Maître, used for solicitors, barristers and school headteachers comme from the latin magister.

I've used Ms since I was 18. Have been happily married for over 20 years. But I get what you're saying that some people do assume it means divorced (especially as you get older - more likely to assume this when you're 48 than when you're 18).

I'm married but didn't change my name so I've never used Mrs. It's Dr at work, Ms for everything else.

@thegirlyupnorth I'm proud to be a Mrs and don't want to lose my title, each to their own.

Can I just ask why you are “proud” though? Proud makes me think of an achievement. I genuinely can’t understand being proud for choosing to use a ‘Mrs’ title.
Does it bother you that your husband isn’t proud and doesn’t use his title to signify marital status?

Why shouldn't people called Dr or Professor or Sir, dame etc use it?

I'm a married Ms.

I'm curious as to what "issues" you think I have.

Just use Ms. I've always used it, when single and married.

I'm married, without issues, and use Ms for exactly that reason. Unless I'm really pissed off, then I use Lord, Rt Hon, lady, Rev or any of the other options. It's nobody's business but mine.

I agree there is a stereotype for Ms being miss with issues. I use Ms as does my mum but everyone around me believes I am angry at being unmarried or am, as they put it, a raging feminist. It does us a disservice that people have this archaic belief and I wish we could end it.

Ms is simply a female that doesn't want you to know they are married or not.

What do you expect people to call you then?

Instead of Miss/Mrs Bean you want to just be referred to by strangers as Bean?

Ms just sounds like you can't speak clearly.

I neither know nor care if you are married or single whichever of the prefixes you use.
Plenty of mothers are called Mrs ChildsSurname when they drop their child at school, when they are neither a Mrs nor ChildsSurname.

Plenty of teachers are called Miss no matter what their actual prefix might be.

They know it doesn't mean anything personal.
It's just teacher shorthand for That Kids Mother & kid shorthand for Teacher

Are you ok dear? Perhaps put the kettle on. 🙄

I work in a GP surgery. One thing that stood out to me is that the folders that hold all patients paper records (they're called Lloyd George files) are different colours for each sex. The ones for women have a section to state married / widowed etc, the ones for men don't. WHY?!?!

I've used it for years and years and never had this. Not once.
Maybe you should change the people around you...

Or you could use actual names i.e Ms Anne Fucket, Ms Barb Fucket etc.

Why does someone selling you a lamp need to even know whether you are male or female. I always try to leave it blank. If pressed I use Dr, not because I am showing off but because it is no one else's business whether I am male or female, married or unmarried.

I became Ms when I got divorced-but (slight derail) I do want to know how long I stay ‘divorced’ rather than single! I kept my ex’s surname that I took when we married as I want the same surname as my children 😁

And to all the PhDs you earned it, bloody well use Dr. (99%, of men would). I would use that title and mine won't be medical. I salute you!

Yep, this.
I've used Ms for donkeys years. And I didn't take my husband's name on marriage, and it's nobody's business but mine.

I use Ms and I am married.

I am technically a Dr but I use that sparingly. If you want issues try a Phd “Dr” on a middle aged woman. I just want a quite life.

@Mintakan

Thing is a like it, and Fucket is not my actual surname. You’d have to say a lot of a syllables.

The more I read this thread and see how people are dictating what people should be doing with how they should be addressed makes me want to dig my heels in on this.

I couldn’t give a monkeys what anyone’s prefix is or pronoun for that matter.

the point is it’s a choice. One that we shouldn’t judge each other for.

I do not judge anyone for using Miss or Ms, it’s clear people are judging the Mrs posters a lot.

I've used Ms since I was 15, so over 25 years. Happily married for over a decade. I must have a lot of issues.

I use Ms for other women unless they tell me otherwise.

YANBU. I regret changing to Mrs when I married, and did long before our marriage hit the rocks. Now I hate seeing it, but don't want to change anything till I tell stbxh I'm done so it won't alert him. My bank cards and credit card say Mrs, why the fuck does that need to be on there.