She climbed up to get the Weetabix

[Bingoisthebestnotbluey]

Dd is 4,5 and very headstrong. She had Weetabix for breakfast-3, which was excessive to me. Later on she asked for more Weetabix as a snack, I don’t want her to have more as she has stomach issues with constipation etc & tummy aches. I got her a snack of strawberries & yoghurt and said there were tangerines & apples too. She threw a huge fit screaming and shouting that she wanted to have Weetabix and trying to knock them out of the cupboard with the sweeping brush. I took them out and put them up really high and she was shouting again. When she’d calmed down, she ate the strawberries and yoghurt and said she just wanted Weetabix because she likes it and that I should let her have what she wants 🙄I explained again why she couldn’t have more Weetabix and we’re only having them for breakfast. She accepted it and it was over (I thought)
Just making dinner before and she said she was hungry, I got her a banana & tangerine and nipped to the loo. When I came out, she’d put her wooden step up to the cupboards, got the Weetabix out and was in the process of putting them in her bowl! Aibu to have lost it?

@Pubesofsoberness Yes, I did feel weird saying that, I was just grasping for something to say and came out with it, so now need to stick to it 🙄
Any ideas for immediate consequences?

I think most of us have done it!

It depends, mine had some TV time at that age so I'd have said no TV time this evening or something else she enjoys doing that you might do together after dinner?

The other thing is though you don't want to carry it on too close to bed time imo, so it can be tricky!

Glad she was on the floor, I have 3 year olds who are climbers and absolutely would put a stool up on the side and climb up in it if they were a little bit bigger esp if there were weetabix at steam. They're def pre-schooler crack

My friends DS (2.5) made little stairs out of the freezer drawers so he could climb up to get the yogurts from the top of the fridge!

Little kids are impressive with their problem-solving skills

I think you sound like a nice mum OP. The punishment was a bit harsh perhaps. Was a punishment actually needed or would a stern word and taking the weetabix away have been enough? Followed by getting her to help with a chore which would then give you chance to give her some praise.
The problem with punishment is it can make the child resentful which then makes them less likely to want to do what you tell them which then makes you annoyed which may result in a downwards spiral.
You can hold a boundary just by not letting her have the weetabix - no need for any further punishment - better to minimise the bad behaviour by swiftly and quietly removing the weetabix, ignore any screaming as much as possible and then move into something else more positive

It's a dream for a child wanting weetabix! Not mars bars or a twix! An innocent weetabix!!

I think she sounds great too but it sad she is really fancied something and this was denied even though its harmless weetabix.

Resourceful little madam, she'll go far 😂
Btw, why on earth are you giving a 4 year old pocket money?

She's had 3. The doctor said to moderate her intake. I'm quite lax with letting them have what they fancy but there comes a line. If it had been a 4th packet of crisps would it still be poor little thing?

Wow!

Op has already said though it's not harmless because she has bowel issues and the dr has said she can't have too many as it constipates her

Ops not being some mean parent saying no to a weetabix

Generally OP I don't think consequences are often needed at that age. A telling off/a stern word is usually enough to get the message across! If a consequence is needed, then perhaps a time out.

Now that is funny!

That's the kind of kid I need my kids to stay away from. They do not need ideas. They use their potty as a stool and their super preschooler strength

Too harsh.
She was a hungry young child .
Good luck when she's a pre teen!!😂

Surely you can’t be serious? 🙄

Weetabix are ideal for constipation.

Oh I didn't see that.

It's hard, especially as she wanted it so badly.

So many replies here that read all my posts 🙈 no point in repeating what I’ve said.

I do feel like I was too harsh now and a bit guilty, but it was the way she was speaking and shouting and screaming at me too and the *I can do whatever I want’ attitude, I just can’t have it

*Haven't read all my posts

ffs it’s not about the wheatabix.

She was told no, and she both gave the OP a mouthful of cheek and then got up on the cupboard to get the wheatabix.

No wonder we’re raising a generation of such entitled children when people are afraid to say no to them because it might cause resentment/they’re obviously resourceful and when they go against their parent and do what they want we should find it amusing.

OP I wouldn’t have taken the pocket money although I can see why you did and don’t think you were in the wrong. Four year olds absolutely do understand longer term consequences. But I would have taken the whole packet of wheatabix and thrown it in the bin, and told her that as she was told no and deliberately went against that, there would be no wheatabix for the foreseeable.

And for the posters saying that wheatabix is good for her, the OP has been told by an actual doctor to limit them.

She was hungry, she told you very clearly what she wanted and didn’t want the other options. You refused and made a big thing of it.
You cant be serious with this.

No, she wasn’t. She had been given yoghurt and fruit and OP was in the process of cooking dinner. She was a cheeky brat.

And as for the pre-teen comment she’ll be a far worse pre-teen if she’s allowed to do what the hell she wants growing up.

That's exactly the kind of thing my 4 year old would do. If I was cooking dinner I'd have taken it away but if it was in between meal times I'd just let them have it. To be honest I'd probably laugh 🙈.

If you feel you were too harsh, give her the opportunity to earn her pocket money back through good behaviour and doing things like picking up her toys. A friend of mine does this and I think it is a good compromise.

As to how do you not break her spirit - set firm boundaries like you just did. There are lines that are not to be crossed. Within those boundaries she can be as cheeky as she likes as long as she is not disrespectful and is responsive to requests (ie boundaries).

In our house, no means no. We are generally a happy, easy going family but our kids know that when we say no, we mean no.

My 7 year old actually has a weetabix obsession. He has 3 before school. He sometimes asks for more and I say no, if you're hungry, have a bit of fruit instead. It's a perfectly reasonable request to decline.

You can maintain the boundary without getting mad. She just doesn't get the weetabix. I've 3 kids and have learned that imposing sanctions willy nilly doesn't work. Simply following through with not giving them the thing they are demanding, coupled with a safety talk, is enough imo. Forget about it, be breezy but don't give in.