She climbed up to get the Weetabix

[Bingoisthebestnotbluey]

Dd is 4,5 and very headstrong. She had Weetabix for breakfast-3, which was excessive to me. Later on she asked for more Weetabix as a snack, I don’t want her to have more as she has stomach issues with constipation etc & tummy aches. I got her a snack of strawberries & yoghurt and said there were tangerines & apples too. She threw a huge fit screaming and shouting that she wanted to have Weetabix and trying to knock them out of the cupboard with the sweeping brush. I took them out and put them up really high and she was shouting again. When she’d calmed down, she ate the strawberries and yoghurt and said she just wanted Weetabix because she likes it and that I should let her have what she wants 🙄I explained again why she couldn’t have more Weetabix and we’re only having them for breakfast. She accepted it and it was over (I thought)
Just making dinner before and she said she was hungry, I got her a banana & tangerine and nipped to the loo. When I came out, she’d put her wooden step up to the cupboards, got the Weetabix out and was in the process of putting them in her bowl! Aibu to have lost it?

@ReliantRobyn

how many more do you think? 9? 10?

My son eats 16-20 apples a week and ended up giving himself a hole in his tooth from the acid.

At first I used to get frustrated at having to buy so much fruit. Now I'm just glad it's not biscuits.

Pick your battles OP.

You're right to have told her off. You set a boundary and she broke it. She needs to learn that no means no. I think the pocket money consequence is too far removed from the event though to make a difference at this age though.

I wonder in terms of snacks whether protein based food might be more filling, particularly if she is wanting something bulky like weetabix. Maybe something like cheese, Houmous, Peanut butter etc might work better than fruit to keep the cravings at bay.

Yanbu you said no. End off to many parents just give in all the time to their little prince's and princesses. I personally wouldn't do the punishment you did purely because its to far into the future. I would of taken the tablet away or sent them to their room.

Setting limits on types of snacks is totally fine. You know your own child’s system better than people on the internet.

I have to laugh at this though. A 4yo climbing to get a desired treat is just so developmentally normal that your reaction is a bit over the top. Yes, you are supposed to be all stern with the child and tell them not to climb and to follow your directions, but then in private you laugh and admire the ingenuity.

I also prefer natural consequences in the moment. Not sure what here, perhaps since she was caught being mischievous and can’t be trusted solo, that means having to help you with your next chore instead of playtime because she needs supervision. It’s really not perfect though. Honestly this is one I would just tell them off, take away the treat, and move on.

You do know that's not the op right?

You sound constipated in your views. Please have more wheatabix.

She sounds a lot like my 4.5 year old daughter, who bellows similar things at me like ‘you always have to be nice to your childs, mummy!’ 🤦🏼‍♀️

She is bright and she also gets a little pocket money because her older brother does and she would absolutely understand a few days later that she had lost it for being naughty the other day.

Some of the replies on here seem more suited to a 2 or 3 year old and not a school age child. Losing it was perhaps not your finest moment (depending on what that actually looked like) but of course she needed clearly telling off for doing something she had just been told not to. It’s not hard to see why there are so many badly behaved children around when you read a thread like this. She’s not a baby, she’s old enough to understand the word no and to listen to it. Of course she won’t always yet, but smiling coyly and letting her carry on wouldn’t be the way to teach her!

Not if you want very loose stools

This is not really a discussion on weetabix. It's a thread about a child not listening to the word no when it had been used repeatedly . I would have been very cross as well op.

Well you could do with laying off them with the crap coming out your mouth when the op has already explained why she can't have any more 🤣

This is AIBU any views expressed on here are not necessarily those of the person posting them.

You chose the wrong place for this.

I am glad you think this too.
I am all for boundaries, and think OP was right to challenge the behaviour, but I have a little bit of admiration for the child.

I’m the ‘don’t fuck with the mummy’ school of discipline. If I say no I mean it. My DC are now teenagers and such matters are a discussion, but at her age I’d be laying down the law and die in a ditch over the outcome.

Too slow on the consequences though. Time out or naughty step in my day. I’m sure someone will come along and say that causes life long damage.

I agree on that, good on her, but I’d still discipline. She’ll go far

It sounds to me like you should ban Weetabix permanently if it has this effect on her!
Too many carbs perhaps.

@Bingoisthebestnotbluey

has she apologised for hurting your head op?

Sorry - wrong thread!

I wonder if your DD wants a bit more independence ( age appropriate of course) and the ability to do things for herself/with you? Is it possible that you baby her a bit or control a lot? Maybe she could help eg set the table for tea, prepare small snack, sort clean laundry, organise a play hour with you of four different activities and when to change over …, maybe other posters would have ideas. So there is an outlet for the headstrong child other than in clashing with you?

Can you ou encourage her to play imaginary games with her teddies etc - she can tell them what to do instead of trying to boss you!

Get her cleaning the guttering if she's good at getting things down from high places.

@Bingoisthebestnotbluey

you did the right thing (s)

Could you tell her she's allowed 2 today. Ask if she wants them for breakfast or for a snack later?

id stop buying them except for treats occasionally. Get Daddy making dippy eggs, porridge beans on toast for breakfast instead, get some protein in her.

weetbix is just carbs, carbs turn to sugar, it's not a good start to the day, anyway, even without her tummy troubles.

i presume you've tried a daily dose of movicol? Did it not work.or does your Dr not agree or something??

you know your DD, you know she'll definitely miss the pocket money on Saturday. I don't think the connection for doing something she was told not to & losing the pocket money on Saturday is a difficult one for a 4.5 year old! It certainly shouldn't be.

However, I think it's dragging out the punishment a bit too far.

You're doing the right thing putting your foot down about her behaviour/attitude. You need to tell her straight. Your 'job' is to look after her, make sure she has healthy food, baths, clean teeth etc etc & it is NOT to pander to her every whim and NO means NO. It sounds like she needs to hear NO a bit more often (for her own good).

make sure DH is properly on board.

You weren't being unreasonable to tell her off but developmentally she's far too young for long term consequences like pocket money loss.

I got confused, apologies OP. Was so infuriated with such a rude response.

Pocket money at 4???

She's feisty and she'll go far if you don't break her spirit.