(Some) men and their ridiculous comments

[crimsonpeak]

AIBU? Please tell me if I was totally reasonable or a grumpy antisocial knackered mother who needs to be nicer.

I’m in a local convenience store, pushing my DD in her pram. She’s fast asleep and covered up, with the hood over her. She therefore can’t be seen. I’m minding my own, thinking about what to have for dinner tonight when a store assistant looks at me and says ‘I hope there’s a baby in there somewhere.’

I suppose I could have laughed and said ‘oh yes, my daughter, she’s sleeping hahaha (you’re really funny) etc’ but instead my brain chose this -

‘Well yes, of course. Otherwise why would I be pushing a pram.’

He then launches into some prattle about ‘you’d be surprised, the people that come in here with empty prams’ - which then made me think he was talking about shoplifters (again, thanks brain).

I just wandered off while he wittered on.

Am I awful? I just CBA with men and their need to say anything to lone women minding their business.

"Yep and it bites" 😁

Sounds like he was trying to reach out to you & hopefully cheer you up. I wouldn’t have taken what you said as a grumpy reply but then I am a mum & I’ve been there.
I used to take my LG’s pram with me when she was at nursery but it was mainly because the epidural killed my back. Chronic fatigue & fibro pain also made it hard to walk unaided so often I used the pram as a walking aid.

It sounds like a poor attempt at a joke to me. Wouldn’t have thought about it again.

Obviously it depends on the way he said it, and the tone etc, but tbh I think you are just reading way too much into this. It sounds like he was just trying to make conversation, and if you don’t want to chat (which is also ok) then just say yes or nod and walk away. Do you also feel annoyed at old ladies when they comment on your baby when you are out? or is it just men?
I am a very anti-social person and hate it when people talk to me like this when I am out… (including old dears commenting on my children) but I think you have made this into something it is not.

Also, I often have an empty pram with me! When I walk to nursery to pick my toddler up, or after I have dropped her off it is empty. And actually yesterday I walked to my local Sainsburys with my empty pram so I could put my click and collect Argos order into it to walk home. I’m a 5 min walk from the shop so it seemed more difficult to drive and then pay to park when I could walk, but I had ordered some large heavy items so would t be able to carry them. Empty buggy was the perfect solution.

I totally agree!
I really don’t see how it matters that it is a man in this circumstance.
I think OP was just having a bad day.

Things like this irritate me so much. It's like being told to 'smile' when I guarantee men NEVER say that to other men!

This is absolutely nothing like being told to 'smile'.

I feel the same way as this, I’m fine with people having a random chats with me :)

The smile thing annoys me though

I just meant about saying something to women that they wouldn't say to men. A bad comparison but I don't imagine a man saying to another man 'I hope there's a baby in there'. They tend not to say anything to men at all in my experience! My partner was actually flabbergasted the amount of times we'd be somewhere and I would be spoken to but he never was. For instance, a man making a joke or something when I went to be served but same people never said anything to him. Hope that makes sense, don't think I'm explaining myself properly!

There are also some misogonists on here belittling the experiences of women and jumping down their throats to shut them up.
People have every right not to open their door (no idea how you can say you haven't seen or experienced it in real life how the hell would you know?)
We do just seem to live in a world of entitlement now.
I demand you open your own door
I demand you give me attention
I demand you entertain my tiny ego.
And there's something wrong with YOU if you don't.

@AaaaaandBreathe
You don't need to explain and you made perfect sense.

I’m someone who passes remarks to random strangers, irrespective of their sex (or age or race).

Mad, I know, speaking to people I don’t know! Whatever madcap antics will I come up with next?!

Hiding in the bathroom to avoid the postman or window cleaner is really not normal behaviour

So this just happened and I am genuinely curious as to who on this thread would have been offended by it as it seems it doesn't matter what is said you just dont like men speaking to you at all.

Ive just opened the door to take a delivery and the guy said to me 'Happy Womans day, hope you have a nice day'.

So should I have been offended by that? Would anyone seriously be offended by that?

Why do I get the feeling if the guy in the supermarket looked like Brad Pitt, the OP wouldn't have been quite so annoyed by the interaction?! 😄

That's just being polite though - did he hang around expecting conversation/expect you to laugh at his jokes/comment on something that's none of his business? Or just use a common saying that someone working with customers say as he walked away? Are you seriously telling me you have no idea what lots of pp are talking about? My partner like to go about his business normally as do I, but it's only me who feels like they have to interact with men because they feel they can say what ever they like if you're female and you're expected to join in happily. The OP sounds to me like someone fed up with these types of situations even if it sounds trivial to you.

Like my sadly deceased ex partner

Some people like to know and argue about the ins and outs of a Fart .!

How true his words are

People wearing headphones do not want to engage with you. Take the hint.

Find somebody who will make eye contact with you (first), then make a comment if you must.

Well if you want to know the truth of it, I wouldn’t have reacted any differently as Brad Pitt has never done it for me 😆 This thread is still alive(!) and @ZeroFuchsGiven is still very (weirdly) invested in it. Go and get a hobby!

Op comes across as a bit sexist, she probably wouldn't have taken the attitude with a woman. What a lot of froth over nothing.

I wouldn't say I was really invested weirdly or otherwise. But this is a chat forum, and I'm chatting, I'm not sure if you should maybe look up the word as you seem to struggle with the concept both in real life and now online!

Its quite ironic really that on a thread about perceived misogyny You would try shut another Woman down by telling her to 'go get a hobby' simply for having a differing opinion.

Enjoy the rest of your day :)

What the heck is a PBP thread ?? munetters closed it

Checkmate zero👏

Has anyone ever come up with a good retort to that one? If so I want to know!