To think we shouldn’t leave kids unsupervised while in bed

[Namechange12908]

…early in the morning. At what age would you do this? DC are 7 and 4 and will happily watch TV/play after breakfast. Kids wake up quite early (6-7ish), and at a weekend DH an I take turns at lie in, the other gets up with the kids. If it’s DH's turn to get up he will usually happily come back to bed for an hour after making them breakfast. He says he will hear if they start fighting or they come find him if they need anything. I would love to do the same but I don’t feel comfortable leaving them unsupervised.IABU?

Mine are 5 and 7 and they get up but I don't allow them to have breakfast until I get up unless it's something like a yoghurt. I've had a lot of personal experiences with choking so prefer to be close by. I know everyone will think this is bonkers but I can't relax otherwise.

So many parents these days seem to think their kids are completely inept or stupid.

Yep - children are much smarter and much more capable than we seem to give them credit for. Of course there will always be some outliers who, for various reasons, can't be trusted with age-appropriate responsibilities, but the vast majority will be just fine with the necessary instruction and guidance.

Its the smart inquistive ones you need to supervise. The screen zombies will be in no physical danger.

@Survey99

id take that chance 🤷‍♀️

you are entitled to still have a life once you become a parent you know

No, I wouldn’t leave my children alone at that age.
DD wouldn’t stay downstairs in her own or get herself breakfast anyway. She sometimes goes down to see the dog, if we have a cuppa in bed but won’t stay for long.

No I don’t suffer with anxiety lol I just don’t think it’s appropriate.

I was raised in the nineties with no access to screens🙄

I still managed to get up and feed myself breakfast, read, colour and play with my toys without some kind of major disaster happening at the age of four.

The worst that happened was spilling some milk while making cereal.

Its the smart inquistive ones you need to supervise. The screen zombies will be in no physical danger.

Sorry but the fact you think children watching TV I the motioning equates to screen zombies shows that you don't have a balanced attitude. You're literally here on Mumsnet torsos, yet think screens have the power to scramble brains- why don't you go any ride a bike or something?

There definitely are children who have an iPad shoved under them etc but watching TV in the morning is NORMAL it's been happening for decades.

In the morning, not whatever I just typed*

@Survey99 Insufferable martyr! 🤣 It's an extra few hours on a weekend, a child doesn't have to be with their parents 24/7! I then spend the whole day with them.
You sound jealous of the many parents who have a balance.

Don't know where you get the "jealous" or "martyr" from, I have repeatedly said I enjoyed spending time with my dc in the mornings. Working FT all week I missed spending that time with them.

There was nothing actually stopping me from staying up late and lying in if I wanted to tell my 4 year old (at the time) not to bother me and plug them into a screen instead, I preferred getting up and engaging 🤔

Set ground rules!
start with “your now aloud downstairs until after ….” We always said 7am.
start with making drinks and biscuits/something in a packet/box.
mine are now teenagers and can cook a full 3 course meal unsupervised very competently, but they still knock on our bedroom door (or phone/text/make an announcement on Alexa) to ask if they can cook croissants or pancakes in the morning !!

My children were left alone from probably 2&4. In as much as I’d get up and make their warm milk, change any nappies, plonk them with toys/tv/both and go back to bed for half an hour.
I knew they were in safe surroundings, could hear them and at that age I wouldn’t go back to sleep.

You can do both, you know.

Children, even four year olds, don't need constant engagement from the moment they wake up.

I always came downstairs and had breakfast with my kids.
It wasn't so much supervision but just spending time with them (especially at weekends as worked through the week).
I can't imagine going back to bed after they got up but each to their own.

Why bother if you're not even going back to sleep? Just sit on the sofa surely?

To avoid Peppa Pig and Paw Patrol first thing in the morning! & to start the day feel sane and not be a climbing frame !
& also to give the children some security, independence and reassurance that they are safe in their own and don’t need to be within touching distance of me.

4 is too young. And I wouldn't leave the 7yo in charge of the 4yo.

But it's Mumsnet, so most dc will have been sorting their own breakfast by 6mo and organising the weekly shop at 3.

I think it depends on your setup and the age of the child, for example a montessori bedroom will be designed and laid out to allow a child to play freely and safely without adult intervention so would be fine for some unsupervised time in the morning depending on the age and ability of the child.

Ours sleep until 7.30 ish now and I am ready to get up then to be fair. But on the odd occasion where I am, really tired etc my youngest goes to play in big brothers room which he loves. They are 10 and 4 though and the older one is happy to 'look after' the little one for 30 min or so.

I think that’s fine, assuming you live in an average house and can keep an eye out. It’s good for kids to have independence and space to themselves

So you can enjoy your coffee in peace without being clambered on and talked at by small humans.

Agree with you in having at least one of you being there. 6/7am is a pretty standard time to be up, not early (4/5am)

Odd thread so many in favour of encouraging young DC to go downstairs, make their own breakfast at 4 and be by themselves while parents stay in bed for hours.

Probably flamed, but part of decision about becoming a parent is surely weighing up this and similar. For no responsibility and lie ins, being child free is the way to go. Many people have unfortunately had neglectful parenting, so just because you did at same age, doesn’t mean much.

My daughter is 5. She's not an early riser on a weekend usually but we are fine to allow her to go grab some cereal and juice and watch TV/play tablet/read if she does. Our house is a weird layout, it's not a bungalow but our bedrooms and living area are on the same floor so we're not far away.

No it's fine, that's what TV and Brioches are for.😄