To think we shouldn’t leave kids unsupervised while in bed

[Namechange12908]

…early in the morning. At what age would you do this? DC are 7 and 4 and will happily watch TV/play after breakfast. Kids wake up quite early (6-7ish), and at a weekend DH an I take turns at lie in, the other gets up with the kids. If it’s DH's turn to get up he will usually happily come back to bed for an hour after making them breakfast. He says he will hear if they start fighting or they come find him if they need anything. I would love to do the same but I don’t feel comfortable leaving them unsupervised.IABU?

the exact age depends on the child and a bit on your home circumstances, but “Saturday morning cartoons and cereal” or the modern equivalent while mom and dad sleep in are not going to hurt children or put them at risk.

Depends on your kids really! My 6 year old is under diagnosis for ADHD/ASD; she’s striving to be painfully independent but will not see dangers, I couldn’t trust her not to leave the house, attempt to cook etc.

have they not already proved that they’re capable of being just fine if you’re husbands already doing it without incident? Maybe build it up by spending time upstairs but awake

Mine are all grown up now but I always got up with mine.

Do you not let them play out of sight during the day?

I wouldn’t leave the 4 year old unsupervised. I’d leave the 7yr old to watch tv in the morning by themselves without problem though but they’re not old enough to be supervising their sibling.

It depends on how “adventurous” they are for me. I know stories of kids who went outside with their bike to visit grandma. Or wash daddy’s car as a surprise. Or try to bake a cake as a suprpise for mommy.

i think this is my worry. I don’t think they'd ever do any of those things but you never know. DC4 scribbled a large piece of artwork’ on the living room wall recently when we were in the other room which took us by surprise as totally out of character. Yes that’s not dangerous but still as a result of being unsupervised for a bit longer than ideal.

4 is too young for me. I always got up with mime though.

They will be fine and it's ok as long as your kids are not the type to go doing anything daft (mine wouldn't have) but also would be irritated that it is nice to have uninterrupted lie in when you can relax knowing other adult is with them. Not the same if after he comes back to bed you've got one ear open downstairs. He can have his cuppa on sofa for that reason I'd say

I do it with my 3 and 6 year old at the weekend though we live in a flat), they wake up and watch cartoons for a bit while I drink coffee and then we all get up and have breakfast.

We've done it since 4yo, but DD goes down, has some cereal, watches her kindle, does some drawing or plays with her toys. She's very happy to play by herself, she does it alot during the weekend days anyway if we are at home

Haha - I feel smug. My 7 year old never rises before 9 on a weekend (even later sometimes). He's always been an owl rather than a lark! He never falls asleep before 9.30 though no matter how hard I try to get him to sleep earlier, Getting him up on a school morning, that's MY problem.

I think 4 and 7 is fine but I would say it depends on the kids. Mine are 6 and 8 and do this and probably have from that age. DD had a birthday party last weekend and we had a house full of 6 year olds. Despite being told numerous times not to, one of the girls kept chasing our cat and manhandling him and ended up with a well-deserved scratch. That's the kind of kid that shouldn't be left unsupervised...

Mine would get up by themselves, the house we lived in though the stairs were in the lounge and our room at the top so within hearing distance. When they were 6 & 4 I had a newborn (who never slept) and they had been doing it before then.

The youngest would never go down alone, and even now at 11 if she's up, we're up.

DH and I do this on a weekend too - the parent whose turn it would have been to get up is still the one 'on duty'. I do feel the lie-in for the not on duty parent is slightly less nice than it would have been if they were on their own, so we aim for the duty parent to get up fully at 8.30ish and give the lie-in parent another hour to snooze in peace.

Mine are a little older but have been going down for a year or two and quite happily get themselves cereal and watch TV together. We have loads of parental controls so nothing bad can be seen and set up our kitchen to be child friendly. I think they like it. They also have no issue coming to get one of us if they need something or are having a disagreement.

As long as you're not asleep and maybe popping down every so often. And that the bigger one has no responsibility for the smaller one I think it's ok. If it's once or twice a week that ok. If you were off for a week and doing it every day I don't know why but I feel that would be different.

I do it with my 3 year old twins! I definitely wouldn't go back to sleep, but I like to get myself a coffee and make their breakfast, then snuggle up in bed and read the news (or Mumsnet). Some mornings I get an hour of peace, other times I'm up and down several times! I will caveat this by saying that our bedroom is right at the top of the stairs and the stairs come down into the living room. There's no way I'd do it if I couldn't hear them well or there were rooms in between. At 4 and 7 I think most children should be fine though.

YANBU. You should wait until they're 18, just to be on the safe side.

You give them responsibility and they will manage it. Be proud of their independence and tell them they need to show you they can handle it.

No reason they can't be unsupervised at those ages. You are just in another room.

I have one child who hates being naughty and another who lives to find creative ways of causing destruction. Normally he's up and down the stairs asking for everything possible between the hours of 6 and 7 so it's easier just to get up. If he's quiet that's when naughty stuff is happening. The eldest (6) is perfectly capable of entertaining himself until we get up.

My kids would have made their breakfast themselves at age. We'd have happily slept on and left them to it. Now the house could fall down around them and if they are playing on their devices they wouldn't even notice. They are 9 and 7 now.

Are you quite an anxious person in general OP?

God, so many MNetters love this patronising line don’t they?!

My 4 year old would do better than my 10 year old at any point even now! I think it does depend on the child. My youngest would just watch TV and maybe help herself to an apple, my 10 year old would start a kitchen fire or flood the bathroom 😂

Why 18?!

how about 30?!

4 and 7 is fine....I wouldn't want to be in a deep sleep and totally oblivious but in bed, dozing or resting and you can hear them, it's fine.

We were lucky in that our bedroom and our living room are on the same floor so we were only a room away. I used to leave them a pre wrapped brioche roll and a carton of juice!