To think we shouldn’t leave kids unsupervised while in bed

[Namechange12908]

…early in the morning. At what age would you do this? DC are 7 and 4 and will happily watch TV/play after breakfast. Kids wake up quite early (6-7ish), and at a weekend DH an I take turns at lie in, the other gets up with the kids. If it’s DH's turn to get up he will usually happily come back to bed for an hour after making them breakfast. He says he will hear if they start fighting or they come find him if they need anything. I would love to do the same but I don’t feel comfortable leaving them unsupervised.IABU?

That's a fairly dumb reason. Why not let them take an unpaid siesta, if they don't have to be physically present all day?

This is a fairly dumb response to a perfectly reasonable comment. I pay a childminder so I expect them to not be sleeping on the job, or lounging in bed. A friend's mum or dad helping me out is different as they're doing me a favour.

Nothings gone wrong so far, I brought my children up to be sensible. Not much can go wrong sitting in front of the telly with snacks while I'm in the next room in our flat.

Can understand this is you're on a different level of the house eg. Ground floor and second floor but not an issue for us.

At the end of the day, parents will do (or not bother to do) as they please.

Most of the time, the risk people take with their child's safety will pay off.

I don't like risk.

Dodge being parents 😂

An hour watching their favourite show downstairs really isnt a problem for the majority of parents. I pity the teacher of a 4 year old if they are unable to sit for half an hour or an hour on their own with parents within shouting distance.

It reminds me a bit of car seats - my kids are always in a car seat but we haven't been in an accident, does that mean I shouldn't have bothered?

More children die from choking (yes even 4 year olds) and other accidents in the home than car accidents, I suspect, certainly choking is a big cause of death.

Of course there is a balance to be struck between giving children independence and keeping them safe and we all make our own judgement calls.

For me personally, I wouldn't want to be properly asleep with my kids downstairs untill the younger one is 5 but I base that partly on the layout of our house (it's a big house and you can't hear them from our bedroom if they're downstairs), I might well feel differently about a flat or smaller house. And also personal preference - I think dozing in bed is different to being properly asleep but dozing isn't that appealing for me, if I can't properly sleep, I would rather be awake

I always got up with my kids for breakfast. Never left them unsupervised at meal times when very young in case of choking etc. definitely would not feel comfortable letting a 7 and 4 year old sort breakfast out for themselves with no supervision.

Exactly, its not ‘hours on end’ as some people have posted. You’re still up to make breakfast, so for most its an hour at the most and the kids are snuggled up on the sofa. We always did it when we were young too.

Don't let @CinnamonJellyBeans make you feel like a bad parent or doubt yourself. She does things her way and that's fine for her.

Mine used to get up at about 6 in the morning. Drink and biscuits left on the landing, they would go down and put tv on. They were generally fine, but DS tried cleaning their shoes when he was about four and a half, red shoe polish on him and his sister! That cupboard got a lock!

I let my 5 and 6 year olds do this. We just let them get up and get their ipads. They cause no problems, they just sit together on the sofa and watch something!

I don't think I allowed my kids to do this until they were both 10+

Is this a genuine answer?

Children walk to/from school unaccompanied at a younger age than that.

@coffeecupsandwaxmelts I'm trying to think back as it was quite a while ago now. I don't think I did because dd has additional needs so it wasn't safe to leave them unsupervised. Think I allowed my other dd to walk to school at age 9 but I did walk partway up with her to see her across the main road.

ops youngest is only 4 years old. Very far from "brought up". I am aghast at the lack of parenting and lack or care about engaging with their young kids.

These are the years to bring the children we chose to have up, hearing so many young children start the first hours of their day left alone so young, stuck in front of a screen, a carton of juice and a biscuit driving home the message they are a chore/irritation while their lazy selfish parents argue who has to get up out of bed is quite sad.

No wonder kids in this country are so messd up.

@Survey99

its an hour on a weekend morning

get a grip

what a martyr you sound

I agree with this. I'm shocked by the replies on here tbh.

I am far from a martyr. Spending stress free time with ds after a long week was never a chore.

Plugging such a young child into a screen first thing every morning is actively encouraging an unhealthy reliance on them which will be difficult to break, all for the sake of 60 mins in bed. Why not just go to bed an hour earlier and get up with your young kids, into the habit of a decent breakfast and enjoy engaging with them . 🤷🏻‍♀️

@Survey99

maybe cos a lot of adults don’t want go to bed at 10pm or whatever on a Friday night in order to get up at the crack of dawn the next day….

ops youngest is only 4 years old. Very far from "brought up". I am aghast at the lack of parenting and lack or care about engaging with their young kids.

I posted before, I also started at 4.
You sound bitter that other parents are lying in whilst you were still getting up to sit with your 10 year old. Like pp said, it's 30 minutes to an hour, get a grip.

It sounds exhausting to have to constantly prove how engaged you are at all times.

Obviously everyone has different priorities. Mine was enjoying my stress-free free time with my young dc and not plugging them into an addictive device, well know to impact development, as soon as they woke up.

If yours is being up 60 mins later on a Friday night knowing it will have a negative impact on your dc, you do you 🤷🏻‍♀️.

DDs are 6 and 4. I think DD1 would be fine but not DD2 although I can see maybe next year I would be more relaxed about it. I wouldn't feel comfortable going back to sleep though. Personally I'm ok with them playing in a different room from me if I am awake and can hear if anything is going on. Maybe I'll start going back to bed with a cup of tea.

I am not bitter about a single thing. I loved lie ins before becoming a parent, but happily adjusted my clock and priorities when raising my dc.

I don't give a shit about who is having a lie in when, mine is grown now (and still in his bed!) so i lie in if and whenever I want. I do worry about kids plugged into devices as soon as they wake as an alternative to parenting, I see the difference in behaviour and emotional and social development in younger family/friends kids who are exposed to this idle parenting.

Sorry you found your young dc exhausting, I found spending time raising mine fun and would go back and do it all again in a heartbeat.

They'll be fine! Ours have been going down by themselves since about age 6. I usually get up with them as I'm an early riser anyway but when I do need a bit of extra sleep I don't worry about them being downstairs.

Ah okay, additional needs are a little bit different.

I just remember getting up and watching TV alone from around reception age, and I was walking over a mile to/from the bus stop aged 11, so it surprises me when people seem to be so overprotective.

Even nowadays children in my area walk to school alone from around age 9-10.

@Survey99

getting enough sleep as a parent IS a priority

it will really do a child no harm to play on their own for an hour whilst their parents have a little snooze for an hour