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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To report online harassment to this woman's employer

132 replies

Feelingharassed · 02/03/2023 20:49

I am being harassed online by a woman I do not know. She sends me vile messages because she thinks I am in a relationship with her ex husband. I am not. I've blocked her but she is very sneaky & still messages me. She works in a school & im thinking of reporting this harassment to her employer? I think I would want to know if an employee in my child's school was involved in something like this. Or AIBU?

OP posts:
Batfurger · 08/03/2023 18:31

Feelingharassed · 05/03/2023 16:11

I've emailed the LADO so thank you to those who suggested this. The police have come back to me & asked if I want her prosecuted so it seems like they are taking it seriously. In all honesty I'm done with the whole thing & I imagine that would drag things out even longer so not sure what to do on that front.

Did they literally ask you if you wanted a prosecution OP? Because, that's not the police's job. They may ask you if you'd be prepared to give evidence in court but if they haven't arrested her and presented a file to the CPS, there's no prosecution at this stage. Just an investigation.

ShakespearesBlister · 08/03/2023 18:40

Feelingharassed · 05/03/2023 16:11

I've emailed the LADO so thank you to those who suggested this. The police have come back to me & asked if I want her prosecuted so it seems like they are taking it seriously. In all honesty I'm done with the whole thing & I imagine that would drag things out even longer so not sure what to do on that front.

How will it drag thing out even more if you get her prosecuted for two years of harassment? If you agree to prosecute then anything she does from this day forward will get her arrested. Repeatedly. Which strengthens your case. Of course you should prosecute!

Out of interest does her husband know what she is doing?

MrsDoylesDoily · 08/03/2023 18:46

Batfurger · 08/03/2023 18:31

Did they literally ask you if you wanted a prosecution OP? Because, that's not the police's job. They may ask you if you'd be prepared to give evidence in court but if they haven't arrested her and presented a file to the CPS, there's no prosecution at this stage. Just an investigation.

Show quote history

That's exactly what I was thinking but perhaps it's different in Scotland?

Original poster
Feelingharassed · 08/03/2023 22:10

Ok. I've re-read the email the police sent after their phone call. What they asked was would be supportive of a prosecution, be willing to give a statement & be willing to give evidence in court. I guess I didn't word that very well but I didn't intend to mislead anyone. I'm so stressed about it all. I have spoken to her ex husband. He is as confused as I am. They are now divorced & she us engaged to someone else so I'm clueless as to why she has this obsession with me.

OP posts:
Led9519 · 08/03/2023 22:26

Have you heard back from the LADO.
had she been in touch since you reported her to police? Maybe (hopefully) they’ve scared her off?

CornishTiger · 08/03/2023 22:32

I think I was the one who originally contacted the LADO so glad you’ve contacted them.

The police are looking to see if you will support a prosecution as part of their evidence gathering. They will then seek to interview her and see if a caution is appropriate or whether they need to seek a prosecution with CPS approving that.

I do think after so much then you need to see where the police case goes with your support.

Original poster
Feelingharassed · 08/03/2023 22:37

No she has not contacted me but I have blocked all of her profiles. She goes by a few different names which is how she has managed to message me in the past but I'm pretty sure I have them all blocked now. I hope so anyway. Before I blocked the last profile she messaged me from I had a brief look at it. She had used a photo from my social media of a book my son had given me, making out it was hers. Quite a niche book & definitely my photo of it. Such bizarre behaviour

OP posts:
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