AIBU not going to my nephew's christening?

[headlessduck]

Hey, my sister has just had her first baby and they have decided to christen him. None of our family is religious, but my BIL's parents are quite religious. I think they are mostly christening him because of them. I think that raising your child to be religious is deeply unethical. I think it is wrong to teach kids their ludicrous beliefs which there is almost no evidence for as if they are facts. It actively discourages critical thinking. You are facilitating a religion that is deeply misogynistic and homophobic, even if you conveniently ignore these parts of the Bible. Christenings are promising to do just that. At best it is a hypocritical promise. In this case, I think this is all it is. I feel uncomfortable supporting this, and I find religious ceremonies infuriating and boring. I told her I would not be going for these reasons. It is their choice. I am not trying to stop them from doing this, I just don't want to go myself. However, she told me this was "ridiculous" and "pathetic" and that it was "mostly just an excuse for a party." What does everyone think of this? AIBU not going to my nephew's christening?

YANBU to not go to the Christening.
YABVU if you gave your reasons as aggressively as you have here.

A simple "No thank you" would have done.

Why wouldn’t you go just to support your sister?

The great thing about being christened is that people are free to forget it ever happened if they want. They aren’t obliged to do or think or believe anything so people are able to see it as simply a ceremony to welcome and celebrate a baby. You really don’t need to use it to make a point.

Why on earth is this about you? Can't you just go and celebrate with your family and keep quiet for the day?

Don't go buying any Easter eggs or anything either OP

Your views on Christianity are pretty extreme. The church of England has just said it will bless same sex marriages which is an important step forwards. There are gay vicars in the c of e. Yanbu to say it's needs to go further, but YABu to describe the whole church as "homophobic". And quite rude of you to say all this to your sister when clearly a christening is important to them. They aren't going to stop being Christians on your say so.

Easter eggs have nothing to do with Christianity

Don’t go, you’ll only spoil it with your twatish views.

You are more sanctimonious than any Christian I've ever met.

On the offchance that this isn't a wind up, if you don't want to go, don't go. But you hav eno right to berate your sister for her decision.

I'm an atheist. My wonderful inlaw family is very religious. I've been to any number of events because it would make them happy. And in turn they accept my (lack of) beliefs with respect and have neve once challenged me or try to change me.

Principles in this kind of situation are totally pointless. Neither you nor I are remotely important enough for our presence to somehow validate the choices and beliefs of others.

On this occasion think it should be about you OP. This is a topic that is important to you. Youre not neutral you're anti. Imagine @x2boys being invited along to my hunt this Sunday as I'm the Huntsmaster. Or perhaps to a seance, or maybe a BNP rally. Would you go? After all its not all about you🤔

I don't go to christenings. I don't agree with them for much the same reasons you don't.

We.as its not the Op,s christerning or their childs ,it really isnt all about them is it ,the Op is entitlefd to her beleifs just as her sister is ,the Op has no right to go and preach to anyone 🙄

Oh get a grip op. It’s a piss up and a buffet and an excuse for one of the rare occasions in life where you can get all your family and friends together. Except from the bigoted self righteous twats like you who would rather cause a bit of drama for nothing, rather than be there for your nephew and sister 🙄

Jesus, way to piss on your sister’s chips 🙄

You clearly imagine your “arguments” to be well thought out and clever. They’re not. You sound pompous and self righteous. I’m an atheist but the fashion for belittling anyone who believes in god is fucking awful. You don’t believe, others do, no need to be so fucking rude.

I disagree very much with your views on religion and baptism. But I agree that you were right not to go to the christening if that's how you feel. At the christenings of both my children I was very clear with people that they were welcome to only come to the party afterwards if they didn't feel comfortable attending a christening. Some people who weren't religious did that, others chose to attend. Either was fine with me; for me it is a very meaningful and important part of my faith and I wouldn't want anyone there under duress. I would, however, have thought a lot less of anyone who expressed their views in the aggressive manner you have.

Assuming you also decline invitations to church (or any other type of religious setting) weddings and don’t celebrate Christmas or Easter in any way then YANBU.

If that’s not the case, well…

Just out of interest, would you choose not to go to a friend's wedding if it's at a church? It's pretty much the same thing in my opinion.

You sound judgemental and opinionated.
Why not agree to differ with your sister?
Why should she respect your opinions if you don't respect hers?

I mean you're fine not to go but I'd just say something like nah not for me have a nice time.

@Hoppinggreen considering the OP is so anti Christian and believes it's all a load of bollocks, I suggested she should stay away from anything Easter related.

Agree with a pp that with such aggressive views I assume you don’t celebrate Christmas or Easter otherwise you’re a massive hypocrite. Would you be so aggressive if invited to a Muslim or Jewish ceremony or is it only Christianity that’s allowed to be criticised in this way?

No your child to care as much as you do. It's not like your nephew will thank you for not attending when he's older. don't go if you really feel that makes a difference but personally I'd go to show up for my family

@Undermyumberellaellaella and Christmas?

Yep, pretty much. I saw someone else had already mentioned Christmas

I had my Dd christened. Our father/vicar did a service just for us and he knew there were none believers who came to the service and he thanked them for coming for supporting the choices we'd made. It wasn't preachy and it was a celebration of something my daughter had asked for.

I think it would be nice for you to go and support them with their choices even if they are not choices you would make.

Everyone is different and church and religion are different for everyone in what they gain from going.

I haven't been for a while I need to go back because whilst I am not practicing I do like all of the people I see when I go and I feel something when I go.