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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do I owe money

113 replies

alwayssocomplicated · 27/02/2023 20:17

A few months ago my parents asked if I would drop them at heathrow airport as the taxi would cost them £80

Their flight is in a couple of months.

We wanted to get away this Easter for a couple of nights and if we go certain dates it is much cheaper/ there is availability.

Typically this clashes with the lift to heathrow and I wouldn't be able to take them.

I would still be able to collect them.

My mum is furious and said I need to pay the taxi.

I said can she not ask one my my 3 other siblings. She said ofcourse not as they wouldn't do the journey for them.

I feel awful.

I haven't booked the break yet but if I don't book this certain weekend we won't be able to afford to go away.

Is it right I should pay?

My parents are much better off than me. But I did say I would give them a lift to the airport all those months ago

OP posts:
HelpNeeded7 · 27/02/2023 20:18

Is this a joke question?

incrediblehux · 27/02/2023 20:19

No, you don't.

user1473878824 · 27/02/2023 20:19

Of course you don’t!!

Pleasegodgotosleep · 27/02/2023 20:19

No! Why is it ok to ask you and not your siblings?? Why can't they get public transport if they dont want to pay for taxi?

LimeCheesecake · 27/02/2023 20:19

So hang on, your mother has 3 other children she could ask, but she won’t because she knows the answer would be no.

did She ask you before booking her holiday ? Or did she book it, assuming you’d say yes, and if you couldn’t make it, would have to pay for a taxi as she can’t ask your siblings because it’s ok for them to say no but not you?

isthewashingdryyet · 27/02/2023 20:19

No, not for you to pay for your parents to go on holiday. This is a bonkers request

Sunsetintheeast · 27/02/2023 20:20

I’m sorry but my plans have changed. The price of the taxis won’t have done, so DM you’re no worse off than if I couldn’t have done it in the first place.

FinallyHere · 27/02/2023 20:20

ofcourse not as they wouldn't do the journey for them.

So you are joining your siblings in the 'of course not' bench. Sounds perfectly sensible to me.

GiltEdges · 27/02/2023 20:20

No, I don't think you owe them the money, but it's a bit of a shitty thing to do to say you'd take them and then back out because you have a better option. Relationships are about give and take as an adult.

MissMarplesbag · 27/02/2023 20:21

Tell your mother to politely fuck off and pay for her own taxi.

dudsville · 27/02/2023 20:22

That's a weird situation! And also, no, you don't need to pay.

MamOfFive · 27/02/2023 20:22

Tell her to fuck off. What an entitled old mare.

Changingplace · 27/02/2023 20:22

Why can’t any of your siblings help? Can you ask them?

Of course you don’t need to pay for the taxi that’s utterly ridiculous.

Campervangirl · 27/02/2023 20:22

Sorry but your dm is being an arsehole.
We have an airport "taxi service" within our family including my dd's inlaws as we all love our holidays, we take it in turns to drop and collect from the local airport but if no one is available we'd get a taxi and pay for it ourselves or drive and pay the parking fee, your dm is nuts, I can't believe she wants you to pay!

1FootInTheRave · 27/02/2023 20:24

Your mum is a nob.

ScarlettSunset · 27/02/2023 20:24

No, you don't owe them anything. I can't imagine it would cost them more to book a taxi for their journey now than it would have done previously, if you had said no originally. Obviously it can be disappointing to have someone change their mind, but it's not like you haven't given them plenty of notice.
Were they planning to give you any money for fuel or were they expecting you to foot the bill for that?

Murdoch1949 · 27/02/2023 20:24

Obviously you're Cinderella in this family. Don't change your plans. Don't pay for the taxi. Toss up whether you should collect them too.

CheeseCakeSunflowers · 27/02/2023 20:24

I think it is your parents who are being unreasonable. You have given them time to make alternative arrangements which is what they need to do. Is a taxi the only other alternative, could they use a train or coach service or pay for airport carparking. Paying for their holiday travel is their responsibility not yours.

Newyeardietstartstomorrow · 27/02/2023 20:25

I agree with @GiltEdges to a certain extent. If they had booked the trip on the basis that you were taking them, then its a bit crap to back out. However its also crap of them to demand payment of the taxi because they couldn't possibly ask any of their other dc.

LadyHarmby · 27/02/2023 20:25

Think we need more detail on why she won’t ask your siblings

Original poster
alwayssocomplicated · 27/02/2023 20:26

Thank you for the replies.

In answer to why my other siblings can't take them, they just do not do favors for other, I am not sure why. My sister lives up the road from me and I did ask her but she hasn't replied (and won't).

OP posts:
Sparklybanana · 27/02/2023 20:29

Charge her for being a taxi service that covers the cost of going on a different date...
Plans fall through. The fact she won't ask your siblings though is a bit weird. I would book. There's loads of time for her to find an alternative.

neverknowinglyunreasonable · 27/02/2023 20:29

I think the only reasonable thing to do is pay for their taxi and also for their holiday to show you are sorry. Also you shouldn't go on holiday but instead use the time to sit at home and think about your actions.

Either that or tell her to sod off.

FictionalCharacter · 27/02/2023 20:30

alwayssocomplicated · 27/02/2023 20:26

Thank you for the replies.

In answer to why my other siblings can't take them, they just do not do favors for other, I am not sure why. My sister lives up the road from me and I did ask her but she hasn't replied (and won't).

There’s no need to think in terms of why you or your siblings can or can’t do it. Most people make their own way to the airport. Yes, taxis are expensive, but the cost of getting to the airport is a fact of life. You get a train or coach, or a taxi. Your parents are capable of doing that just like other people do.

Brokendaughter · 27/02/2023 20:30

Tell her you will pay her back the same amount she planned to pay you to do it in the first place, which I'm fairly confident is nothing.