Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5

Original poster

Do I owe money

113 replies

alwayssocomplicated · 27/02/2023 20:17

A few months ago my parents asked if I would drop them at heathrow airport as the taxi would cost them £80

Their flight is in a couple of months.

We wanted to get away this Easter for a couple of nights and if we go certain dates it is much cheaper/ there is availability.

Typically this clashes with the lift to heathrow and I wouldn't be able to take them.

I would still be able to collect them.

My mum is furious and said I need to pay the taxi.

I said can she not ask one my my 3 other siblings. She said ofcourse not as they wouldn't do the journey for them.

I feel awful.

I haven't booked the break yet but if I don't book this certain weekend we won't be able to afford to go away.

Is it right I should pay?

My parents are much better off than me. But I did say I would give them a lift to the airport all those months ago

OP posts:

Jamieleecurtain · 27/02/2023 22:50

Tell her your siblings won’t help her because she behaves like this so in future you will be taking a leaf out of their book. Oh and cancel the return pick up and watch her switch back to being nice.

dontgobaconmyheart · 27/02/2023 23:03

er no, you don't owe them anything.

For them to be 'furious' and to say that to you is really bizarre and outlandish behaviour. They don't sound like they have much grasp on reality if they actually believe that they were entitled to either a lift or payment for a taxi for their journey to their own holiday.

I'd just tell them I'm sorry but that is the way it is, they'll still go, they're just trying to manipulate you into covering their costs OP, which is not how people who care about each other behave.

Gymnopedie · 27/02/2023 23:15

My mum is furious and said I need to pay the taxi.
I said can she not ask one my my 3 other siblings. She said ofcourse not as they wouldn't do the journey for them.
I feel awful.

Stop feeling awful and book your break. If your mother was a bit put out and said oh that's a shame it would be one thing. But furious?? Stop being her dogsbody when she clearly doesn't value anything you do for her, learn to say no, that doesn't work for me. Start practising boundaries before she becomes even more demanding as she gets older.

Cornishclio · 27/02/2023 23:16

No you shouldn't pay. In fact you should say that as you were going to charge them anyway a taxi may be cheaper. It sounds like your siblings already know your mum is a CF. Next time she asks for a favour say no.

Soapyspuds · 27/02/2023 23:22

Absolutely not.

I would not pick her up either for being such a cheeky fucker.

Cantstandbullshitanymore · 27/02/2023 23:45

GiltEdges · 27/02/2023 20:20

No, I don't think you owe them the money, but it's a bit of a shitty thing to do to say you'd take them and then back out because you have a better option. Relationships are about give and take as an adult.

That’s kinda mean and unwarranted when you say better option. The option to save money on a vacation which they may otherwise not be able to afford is as good a reason as any to change their mind and her parents have months to find an alternative.

If I was the parent I would be happy they have the opportunity for an vacation as well and find an alternative as it’s a very very small impact.

Fraaahnces · 27/02/2023 23:45

Sounds like there’s a good reason for not doing flavours for your parents. They sound like entitled assholes. Tell your mum to jam it.

Mari9999 · 27/02/2023 23:54

I would not expect my child to pay for the taxi, but on the flip side I would ask myself" how often has my mother put herself out or gone to an extra mile to do something for me?"

In my case my mother has done many more things for me than I have done for her. I this situation, I would keep the promise that I made to my mother or at least arrange and pay for her transport to the airport.

I would never question what my siblings do or do not do for my parents. I would view that as relations between them and my parents , and that does not involve me.

dizzydizzydizzy · 28/02/2023 01:02

You have given plenty of notice.
Your mum should book a taxi (and pay for it).

Butchyrestingface · 28/02/2023 05:28

Your parents are outrageous. Sounds like your siblings have got their number.

Womencanlift · 28/02/2023 05:36

Time to step out of the FOG and not make yourself so available.

As the only driver in the family I am used to being asked for lifts but if I couldn’t do it nobody would throw a strop

ChrisPPancake · 28/02/2023 18:57

I had another thought about this @alwayssocomplicated - what's the difference in price between you going away so you can accommodate your mum's lift to the airport and not? Can I be clear that I am absolutely not suggesting you change your plans btw Tell your mum that if she won't fund that difference then you won't be paying for her taxi. Although you are absolutely under no obligation to do so anyway!

saraclara · 28/02/2023 19:08

Tell her that in future you won't agree to do favours in advance, as this incident has shown that you can't be certain that you'll be available and you don't want to let them down as it causes such anger.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5

Swipe left for the next trending thread