To say something to my sister about the baby

[Zcity]

She's gorgeous, 14 months old. She will shuffle on her bum to get around a little. She cannot crawl at all, or stand by herself, she has no inclination to move really, she's very happy just sat on a mat.

I do not have children and Google tells me very different things but I'm worried (as is our mum) as she said to me that baby should be crawling at least.

DM bought the subject up with her but she said she had been to the GP and GP said it's fine as she can stand unsupported- but thing is, she can't. She cannot stand by herself, if you gently pull her up so she's standing she will need to lean against something (sofa) and she only stays upright for seconds until her legs buckle.

Would you be concerned or am I overstepping as loving auntie and wind my neck in? All babies are different, which I understand! Maybe just a late walker? Hoping for reassurance!

You are probably right that the baby is a bit late with some skills, but you don't want to be the one who tellls the parents. They will hear in time from their GP or a daycare worker etc. Just be kind, loving and supportive ❤️

If it makes you feel any better one of mine crawled at 9 months and walked at 10 months and started speaking at 14 months - and he's autistic too. And I've never seen any literature that suggests that mobility and autism are linked.

Both my kids didn’t walk until they were 17 months old. I took them to the GP at 15 and 16 months and they said bring them back if they’re not walking at 17 months. All of a sudden at 17 months they started walking.

You are not being unreasonable to be concerned, but you need to tread lightly bringing up the matter with your sister. Maybe spend some time with the baby, encouraging her to stand while playing with her. My son was 14 months before he walked. He didn't crawl. He never crawled. He rolled. He would push off from obstacles to change direction. He could sit up when he got to his destination. My sister sat down with him one day, and taught him to crawl. Just playing with him, she made it a game. Shortly after that he was on his feet cruising around holding onto furniture, and then sailing across the grass on his own feet.

My DD started crawling at 16 months and walked at 20 months. I was a bit worried too. But she was just developing at her own pace. Enjoy your niece!

My DD never crawled at all and was also quite happy to just sit until about 16 months. Then about A week of cruising around the coffee table, then walked!

All totally normal. Some very defensive replies about you overstepping.

Personally I think you sound like a very lovely, caring auntie. Your niece is a very lucky girl to have you.

My DGS didn’t walk until he was 21 months old. He bum shuffled very efficiently but wouldn’t put his weight on his legs. He was referred to a lovely paediatrician who gave him some physio exercises but wasn’t overly concerned. He just got up and walked one day. The advantage then was that he didn’t fall very much. His mum got a shock when her next child walked at the more usual age of about 12 months and got into everything! Don’t worry.

You could be describing one of my daughters here. She never rolled, never crawled and only started to 'bum shuffle' when she was about 13mths old. She finally started to walk when she was 17mths old and now, at 20mths she is a very confident walker who still does the odd bum shuffle if she fancies.

In contrast, my older two children both crawled by 9mths and were walking on their first birthday and my youngest who is now 7mths was crawling at 5mths and cruises around the furniture to the point we think she'll be walking in the next few weeks at the rate she's going. All four of my children have been brought up exactly the same and all four of them have rolled, crawled, bun shuffled and walked at different ages... how boring the world would be if we all hit milestones at exactly the same ages. Its normal for babies to develop in their own time, when they are ready.

Apparently as a baby I was a bottom shuffler who didn't walk until 22 months, my DD only started bum shuffling at 14 months, never crawled, started cautiously walking around 19 months. DS was the speediest crawler from around 13 months, think he was quite happy being able to zip around on the floor so didn't bother with walking until around 17 months. Most likely it is nothing to worry about but HV can advise if you do have concerns.

When it’s a first I think your always watching, my oldest tried to crawl but didn’t realise he needed to lift his head up off the floor so soon have up and started walking around 10 months, his brother on the other hand was 3 months prem and crawled at 11 months and was quite content with that and didn’t start walking until 16 months, but on the second you realise that things will be done at their own pace, my dad tells me that I was climbing out of my cot at 18 months to go to the toilet in the middle of the night. Just enjoy the happy baby she is xx

Should Google "bluey baby race" instead of whatever the heck it is you found

Don’t say anything. I used to go to baby groups and ALL the babies were crawling before my DD… I was upset about it and the last thing I would’ve needed is my mum and sister commenting! Thankfully they were both reassuring .. the. All of a sudden one day she crawled to the sofa and pulled herself up, started cruising around from one sofa to the next.. then we were at mums and her room is bigger so the sofas were further apart and my DD just walked across the room!…. I did feel quite pleased when we walked into baby group and all the others were crawling still and my DD was walking…. (Pleased because every wk the other mums asked ‘is she STILL not crawling?!’)

Your niece is probably a very content little thing and happy to sit and take in her surroundings … she might be a thinker, she might hit all the physical milestones late but super intelligent and talk really early.

Reassure your sister, I can guarantee she’ll be worrying. Tell her to enjoy it… once they do walk you really know you’ve got them! Lol

I think you are being a caring Auntie, it’s lovely you take an interest and try to negotiate between your DM and DS .
i am a mum of 6 and agree all Babies are different.

My middle child only bumshuffled until he was 19 months old, got up walked and was running 3 minutes later. I wouldn't worry about it too much the HV will be monitoring too :)

I believe there are no concerns until after 18 months, but even then some children don’t walk for some time after.
Our son (15.5 months) was cruising & climbing the stairs from 9 months, crawling from earlier than that, took his first independent steps just after his birthday but didn’t repeat the feat again until just before 15 months and now he’s basically running everywhere.
Another thing to consider is if a child is repeatedly ill it can impact walking - our son had a reem of things one after the other from starting nursery & looking back I think this impacted him.
If your niece doesn’t already have one, perhaps gift her a wee trolley to push around (we got a wooden one with blocks) and that’ll encourage her to walk with support building leg strength.

Step away from Google and being an interfering family.member. some babies walk at 8months some at 18months some start talking at 13months some at 36months by the time they are all 5 and heading for school they can all do everything they need to for that age. Leave it alone

My eldest was walking well before her first birthday, however my second child bum shuffled, never crawled and didn’t walk until she was about 16 months old. They progress at their own rate.

Some babies do not crawl but shuffle around on their bottoms. I was such a child. Some children are late to walk, it doesn't mean there is any thing wrong. Both mine were late to walk.

Ha ha, this is great advice, and reminds me of when I was struggling to toilet train DS. He does have ASD and ADHD but high functioning. We had a few years trying to sort him before he started school and I was at my wits end - but someone said the same. "How many people (apart from those with severe disabilities) do you see wearing nappies in their teens? He'll get there."

Of course we all focus on our own/family DCs, but sometimes it does help to take a step back and consider the broader picture.

That's not to say some children don't have problems, of course - but as PPs have said I'm sure your DNiece is absolutely fine. Your DSis should enjoy the peace while she still can.....

I had 2 late walkers - 18 months and 15 months - and people commenting on it really bothered me. More so the first time round as it was something that was already worrying me.
Even the health visitor 12 month forms flagged them up as behind in their gross motor skills but the health visitors had no advice on anything I could do about it. They told me they had low scores, made me really anxious and then said they wouldn't do anything until they were older....
Obviously they were both fine and walked in their own time and now run and jump around.

@LoveBluey the NHS considers 10-18 months the normal range for walking. 15 & 18 months isn’t late at all..

My DD didn't walk until she was just over 2. She never crawled either and wasn't that interested in cruising. We took her to a GP as people were telling us that we should be worried - she was our first so we had no real barometer for what was 'normal'. The GP was terrific and said no issues (after checking her) and that some children walk later than others.

She's now 15, with the longest legs ever and walks so fast!

I know it's within the normal range but it's on the later side and when all your friends babies start walking much earlier it's hard not to worry. People at baby groups would comment too.

My DS didn't walk until 17 months. He could stand though. It could be a hip problem but they won't even start investigating until 18 months as kids vary so much.