Pronouns annoyance

[crochetmonkey74]

I support every human being having the right to be who they are. This is not a bashing thread but I do want views on this.
Today , my friend messaged something about a non binary celeb. I replied with "I like him I think he's great" she then sent a text lecture about misgendering.
I actually didn't do it deliberately. My thoughts are these though: how can you insist on how others (who you will never hear or even know about) talk about you?
I agree with referring to people however they want you to in real life of course, am I just being a grumpy old bag? I genuinely want to get better at understanding the pronoun thing. What are your thoughts?

No thats not what i asked. You said you aupport everyone having the right to be who they are. What does that mean? How are you supporting every human? What rights are you giving them? Where does who they are begin and end? People can be a lot of things. And a lot of terrible things too. So what do you mean?

It is the they/them that's the trickiest. Especially if they present in a traditionally gendered way.
I have a non binary colleague who is very androgynous so they them seems to fit. Often the incongruity is what leads to the dissonance I think

What is non binary OP?

I meant it as I explained

You didnt explain anything.

Someone who doesn't identify as either male or female

People dont identify male or female though. People are male or female.

I gave you what I meant by those words. There's no more to it

There's gender self identification too though

Ok. But they are biologically male or female. If I have pale skin, can I identify as a black woman? No. Can I identify as someone who isn’t black or white? No. Why is sex different?

what does that mean?

But gender is nonsense. There are gender stereotypes but there are as many ways to feel and be a woman as there are (biological) women in the world. I don’t feel like a woman. I am a woman. I just feel like me.

If you Google it, you'll find loads on it it's been in the news a lot particularly recently

You’re still confusing sex and gender.

Sam Smith insists on they as a pronoun but refers to himself/theirseleves as me and I.

Bob Geldof was so great on "This Morning" referred to Sam Smith as "he" the whole way through his interview.

He did it deliberately, no question and neither presenter had the guts to challenge him.

Cheered me up in my sickbed, no end.

I would reply with your choice of pronoun, make one up the sillier the better, and insist that your 'friend' uses it.

Good for you. You’re the majority and you have it very easy. Great. Some - a tiny minority of people - don’t.

Whats the difference?

@SpanishGirly excellent 😂

I agree it's really not. Trying to get pronouns right but slipping up is not in the same league at all.

Hmm i dont think you actually know.

@brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr and the tiny minority need help to accept their body and their biological sex. Not for the world to pretend they’re something they’re not.

Gender is just made up bullshit though that reinforces stereotypes. Why is there all this pretence that it matters & that biological sex doesn't matter?

I used to think using peoples preferred pronouns was kind & didn't actually harm anyone, even if I was uncomfortable & it felt a bit off to call a man a she. I was wrong. Using someone's preferred pronouns on their say so just Makes me feel complicit in pushing the narrative that it's possible for someone to change their biological sex, which isn't possible.

What exactly is respectful by pretending it’s possible to change sex? What’s respectful to women by going along with the delusion that womanhood is merely a costume or a set of stereotypes?

Would it be ‘respectful’ to agree with anorexia patients that they’re fat and need bariatric surgery?