Just out of parents night - 11 years new novel is about a boy who wants to be a girl

[Workingmomof2]

And the teacher was talking about it as a great book. I’m seriously not happy. Would I be unreasonable to raise this with the school. Why is this kind of idea even introduced to our children so young. No wonder they are all so confused.

Personally I don't believe in gender it's just a set of stereotypes therefore gender dysphoria could, as the dsm says, not be a mental illness. However, like the remaining diagnosis of being so unhappy with your sexuality you hate yourself perhaps this should be reinstated. Men and women exist and have different bodies. That needn't lead to gender stereotypes as we are all individuals who have a personality and can dress and act how we want to.

I didn’t say everyone experiencing gender dysphoria was jumping on a bandwagon. I said there’s a risk of social contagion. Don’t put words in my mouth please.

Many children experiencing gender dysphoria are gay, many are autistic, many have been abused, some of them sexually.

Seriously, go and read up about GIDS. This is not about someone being themselves. If a boy wants to wear a dress, that ought to be fine. It doesn’t make him a girl.

This is not a zero sum game. We have separate spaces for boys and girls. How a teenage boy lives his life is very significant to many teenage girls if living his life means he wants to get changed in their changing room and the school are foolish enough to believe that’s okay.

My thoughts exactly. The child in question is a lovely child. They live nearby so all the DC play out together and everyone gets on lovely. I think because conversations have been had at school and home

Just wondering for those people who are against the idea, how would you deal with the fact that there could trans kids in your child's school? It's an issue that can't be escaped then even though the children are young.

Therefore I don't really accept trans as a concept. We're all trans or non binary. You are you. I don't even really buy that women have an understanding of other women. You only know your own experience. Biology still exists and is relevant to sports, Prisons and toilets

Oh god it’s you. If people admitted it’s a mental illness then appropriate treatment could be made available.

it’s the children who have been sterilised and mutilated I’m worried about who will never have chance to find out what could have been.

it’s the women scared to access what should be their safe spaces because some bloke thinks it’s his right to be in there

its the women put off sport because blokes think they can just decide to enter the women’s category

its the lesbians being told that they shouldn’t be bigoted and suck a man’s dick.

not someone with an untreated mental health illness thinking the world should compromise so they can live their best life.

You're accusing others of being uneducated and you really are asking that question?

I cant spell it all out for you, you sound incredibly naive. What do you think is happening in toilets or changing rooms or single sex spaces when they are 'socially transitioning'.

Wanting to be a boy is one thing. Being told you actually can be one is quite another.

And actually I grew up with the idea that boys were better than girls, because that was what George believed and I bought into it, not least because Ann was a terrible female role model. It took me a long time to realize that was internalized misogyny and that women are amazing too.

My mum says she 'thinks like a man' I told her she thinks like herself and no one else. How could anyone possibly know what it's like to be anyone but their self?

I have a 12-year-old DC and would have no issue with this book, we discuss everything with them in person and good to read things that offer differing experiences. Problems arise when parents don’t speak to their children about the world.

I’m not for censorship and these things open good discussions over the dinner table. Most books are fine, whatever you believe, if you spend time talking to your children and give them good critical thinking skills.

I have no problem with my children learning about any aspect of the LGBTQ+ experience, I talk my children about all kinds of relationships and have done since they were young using age appropriate language.

I’m not sure keeping children in the dark about the variety of life is helpful, when they will experience it anyway on social media or the playground. Difference is, if you don’t talk about some topics early on, they won’t feel comfortable coming to you when they encounter things they don’t fully understand and just read about it online or ask their friends anyway

Sorry that was my fault. I do know what happens, I said before it wasn't alright. Really sorry. I misunderstood slightly, was more thinking about medically transitioning. I do know how awful it is, for example cases where rape cases aren't taken seriously because the man has now transitioned into a woman. It is horrible, I know this. I'm just trying to say this is certainly not all trans people, and they don't deserve this sort of stigma. Kids learning the basics of them in a friendly isn't a problem.

@SausageCat47

But there is a difference between giving children access to a variety of books and putting a book on the curriculum. The latter is a deliberate act. What is the school trying to teach the children through studying this book? That’s the question.

Hearing people say that kids need to learn about this stuff at school makes me think I'm living in a parallel universe. Do you not know that kids already know about it? You'd have to live in a cave to be unaware of trans issues.

If my kids had been given that book then I'd make a point of telling them it's just a silly story and boys can't become girls or vice versa.

And you, dear, are ignorant. Most research, which is limited, shows that those who transition in early adulthood retain the same degree of mental health concerns that caused them to be steered towards transition in the first place. Primarily because for the vast majority no consideration was given to co-morbidities that existed at the time they identified as trans.
there are whole swathes of detransitioners who’s lives have been blighted by being encouraged to have their breasts removed, or take opposite sex hormones leading to irreversible changes.

Anything that glorifies such brutal practices has no place in schools.

I would be kicking up an almighty fuss and going mad about this if (God forbid) this nonsense was introduced at my kids school. Totally ridiculous.

I would agree with you about kids learning about it, if there was some confidence that gender as a concept or gender ideology is not sold in a binary (no pun intended) fashion

But thats not what is happening in schools unfortunately. There isnt any recognition that the vast number of children feeling or thinking this way have co existing disorders, usually PTSD, ASD and/or an abusive background.

Children dont seem to be being taught about biology, every single mention of male and female or men and women is spoken about inn terms of gender. Why is sex not recognised, where has it gone, what does it mean now. You cant fill out a form these days without gender being the option and sex has disappeared. Its unthinking and dangerous and Im not entirely sure I understand where its all come from.

I'd love to know where it's all come from. What's the agenda?

Totally disagree. There is no need to introduce this to children in primary school, especially in a way that means that there is no discussion around the issues. I sincerely doubt children will be allowed to say I don’t think girls can turn in to boys for example. I am all for open discussion but it won’t be that. It will be lies presented as unassailable fact.

If gender dysphoria is not a mental issue what is the cause of someone being trans? What causes it then?

I asked @ourflagmeansdeath the same question but no reply. If not a mental illness, what is it?

I don’t know exactly which book it is, so I can’t comment on the teaching aims. However, historically censorship in schools has never gone down well when looked back on. Schools in the USA heavily censor many books in many states (my friend is a librarian there) and it helps no one. Censorship seems to be be a way of escaping teaching critical thinking skills/or a way of controlling messages, sadly common and many books with any hint of LGBTQ+ themes are banned, some with certain political messages are banned too in the USA…the history of banned books is an important part of librarianship studies. I’m just concerned as censorship is a slippery slope…

I don’t agree with the editing of old editions to fit modern ideals either even though I don’t agree with some of the phrases with my more modern mindset, again it’s better to have critical skills than to change the books themselves

And will there be a discussion about why George is so selfish to want to take another pupils role from them in the play. If George was good enough to act in the play he would have got picked for a role in it

Is this the real plot if so it’s absolutely inappropriate. Girl has to give up part to be a good girl because a boy says he feels like he is a girl. Disgraceful

It is a sense, a feeling inside of people that they simply do not belong in the body they have been given. It feels as if the way they truly feel about themselves and who they are does not fit with their biological sex. It is a complex but real feeling, and it is not a mental illness. It is a feeling of complex disease that can't properly be explained unless you truly are trans. I am not trans so my reasoning may not make complete sense, but it is the brief facts.

I don’t see it as having anything to do with censorship.

I don’t send my children to Catholic school, so I wouldn’t expect to find a book that presented Catholic ideas about the world as fact on the curriculum.

This is the same thing. I don’t want gender ideology and queer theory presented to my children as unarguable fact - rather than the ideology it is - in a manipulative little story book about being kind. No, thank you.