To ask for only on Mumsnet facts/opinions? ( light-hearted)

[bluelollipop99]

I'll start....

It doesn't matter you have two kids and have lived together five years , he's your boyfriend, not your partner if you are not married...

You are a terrible mother if you introduce a partner of less than two years to your children...

The on the beach advert is mentally scarring...

You must do the Freedom programme, have you not done it? You must, NOW.

The 2024 election will be fought and won entirely on lab/lib/con attitude to trans issues.

No one will be voting on the economy, tax, NHS , energy prices, crime, education, pensions etc.

It will be purely decided and voted on which party will overtly campaign to kick transwomen out of female toilets .

The answer to any budgeting/cost of living questions is always lentils.

The answer to any catering problem is a big chilli and salads.

The average mumsnetter can't wait to tell you how stupid even the most mainstream Christians are, ( think C of E, Methodists, United Reformed Church ), and has hilarious anecdotes of how she outwits them by shouting "skyfairy!!" and "flying spaghetti monster !" at them when they dared to mention they were going to the church fete.

Unlike all the other sheep in the class, her 7 year old son has been an atheist for years and independently demanded to be withdrawn from all R.E lessons in school, ( he's made her particularly proud by independently boycotting the school nativity, although the teacher is begging him to be Joseph).

The very same Mumsnetter however, is a lot quieter about her millitant atheism when talking to her Jewish/ Muslim/ Hindu/ Sikh /Bhuddist/ Ba'hai friends . She'll fall over herself to get cross at anyone who isn't understanding enough to any faith/ religion that isn't Christian....

It's "disgusting" to sit on a bed in "outdoor clothes" (whatever those may be).

Working mums are only working because they want to be part of the "corporate rat-race".

It's "grim" to have sex when your children are under the same roof as you unless its after 11pm on Saturday night and the door is locked.

Sheets must immediately be changed after sex has taken place.

London is a terrifying place where knife-wielding zombies stalk the streets from 4pm and everyone is rude and aggressive.

Don’t be a SAHM - if you are you’re lazy and your husband will immediately have an affair, and you’ll deserve it for staying at home all day doing nothing but looking after your children.

BUT - don’t go back to work either, because why even have children in the first place if you’re just going to palm them off on someone else because your career is more important to you than your kids?

But if you stay at home you lack drive, self
respect and nobody will have an ounce of respect for you either for being such a doormat.

But if you go back to work your children will be emotionally neglected and you’ll be neglecting your husband too which means he’ll have an affair.

But if you don’t have kids at all you’re weird.

And if you do you’re responsible for climate change and the general downfall/ demise of your entire life.

Either way it’s pretty much mandatory to regularly comment ‘they’re my world’ to anyone who does or indeed doesn’t want to hear it.

But nothing makes. the average mumsnetter foam at the mouth quite so much as the Catholic church....( even though the current pipe has publicly stated it would be sinful not to love and respect gay family members...)

Lolabear38

I won't quote your post here, because someone reproducing a long post just so they can type "This" under it is really annoying.
But your post? That!

Mumsnet fact: Looking put together and wearing anything remotely Fancy is the devil's work. Everyone knows that virtuous, down to earth, real woman wear pyjamas, get covered in biscuit crumbs and walk around the house in Crocs. The gods see their earthly pyjama-y qualities, and will reward them in heaven. Presumably.

If you drink more than one small glass of wine at Christmas and on your birthday then you almost definitely have an alcohol problem. You definitely shouldn't partake at all if your partner is also drinking because then neither of you will be available for the inevitable times when your DC need to be taken to A and E. And because you live "very rurally" there are no other options like uber or a neighbour to take you, and you must only ever call an ambulance if you have actually died.

Any debt is bad but a mortgage good debt right there.

£150 k mortgage and £20k debt bad.
£170k mortgage good.

@ichundich the cleaner one is funny! I was told on here I should increase my cleaners pay even tho I was paying exactly what she asked for. It's her job to increase it. Oh and it's already more than I pay for childcare per hour soooooooo

Indeed, on MN you must pay your cleaner more than they ask, plus holiday and sick pay, because you are legally her employer, despite the fact that she works three hours a week for you, cash in hand.

Oh, and not to forget that your cleaner is a brilliant, astute businesswoman who makes a good wage from her work, but she is also poor, downtrodden and vulnerable woman who you are exploiting.

(I know there will be many cleaners who are one or the other, but there are some posters who think that they are somehow both).

Also: men are awful, toxic, exploitative. All of them. You are deceiving yourself if you think they don't HATE HATE HATE us all.

Even though you are married, with three sons, you are a traitor to feminism if you don't hate your male relatives.

IRL: The only people who think like this are women who, through no fault of their own, serially attract wankers, and don't understand that a lot of people have very different and wholesome experiences, which are no less valid.

Inspired by a current thread ....
Children always come first, unless they get mauled by the family dog in their own home. Then the dog comes first.

So true

toxic positivity around pregnancy tests doesn’t turn them positive!

also all the plastic and expense of FRERs…

If a man cheats on you, feeling angry towards the other woman is anti feminist. She must be vulnerable and not to blame in any way.