To ask for only on Mumsnet facts/opinions? ( light-hearted)

[bluelollipop99]

I'll start....

It doesn't matter you have two kids and have lived together five years , he's your boyfriend, not your partner if you are not married...

You are a terrible mother if you introduce a partner of less than two years to your children...

The on the beach advert is mentally scarring...

The last one made me chuckle 😂

Reading Shakespeare at two isn’t that exceptional, your baby might be bright but certainly not gifted. All MN posters babies have done similar and they’re ‘bright but not exceptional’ at their ‘leafy comp’.

LTB, every post, some of them are understandable but any post with even the smallest mistake and its LTB, I'm surprised anyone still has a husband on here 😂

Every badly brought up child is ND so it’s excusable
Naice ham is amusing
If you have twins you are a journalist or a pathological liar

I hate seeing "A Clever Child Will Do Well Anywhere"

Technically it's accurate but forgets to add "Largely At The Expense Of Their Mental Health" if it's not the right school

I also hate "You knew he had children when you met him"

It's so smug and simplistic and just ignores EVERYTHING about relationships and complex dynamics

And anyone suggesting adoption on a fertility struggle thread should be reported and given a 2 week ban IMO

Friend five minutes late for your meetup? Unfriend, block, and move on with your life.
Knickers under PJs because bodily fluids, EW GROSS!
Introverts are just doing it because they think it makes them special.
Pain during a smear isn't a thing. Regardless of a woman's physical or emotional history, it's 'mild discomfort' and they need to get a grip.
Dogs must be allowed everywhere at all times.

Pain during a smear isn't a thing

Yes!

I was ASTOUNDED by a recent thread like that with posters falling over themselves competing with each other as to how easy it was.

I had just had a smear, it had hurt, I have been repeatedly told it's because it's not quite in the right place. She took several goes, I bled, and was told that because I bled I might need to go back.

But according to Mumsnet, my experience doesn't happen that or I am some sort of weakling

it’s impossible to live on a wage less than £50k in London

You are risking being robbed and beaten being in some areas of London at night

If you really love your partner you never ever feel attraction to anyone else

you shouldn’t tell your children off or shout at them as this shows you have lost control

Every ex is abusive. Even if they were just a bit of a dick on occasion, it’s abuse.

No woman should be in a relationship with a man because they've all done something requiring us to LTB.

I'd go so far as to say that LTB is the appropriate response to nigh on every thread on here, including the ones that never mention a B that we need to L!! 😂

Towels should be washed after each use.

Enjoying your own birthday or wanting to celebrate it is pathetic, needy and childish
However a huuuuuuge fuss can be made about valentines day (with a slight sneer) and an enormous fuss is required for mother's day

All women are martyrs

Any partner interacting with a member of the opposite sex for any reason for any longer than a millisecond is clearly having an emotional if not full-blown affair

If your ex ever dicks you around, you should go back to court. Regardless of cost. Find the money

If you drink more than a small glass of wine a week you need to go to AA.

One whole chicken is enough for a family of 25

......two XL pizzas, 4 sides, 2 litre drink is only enough food for just one person

If you wear heels you are a pathetic loser catering to men's fetishes and desires (so I've just learned) 😳🤯🤣

I came on to post about how everyone who's a bit of a self centred arsehole is a 'narcissist', but I see @Bigbadfish got in first .

Everyone over 45 who occasionally forgets plans or is a bit stroppy for no particular reason probably has dementia.

Adding (or 'offering') more protein is the answer to all questions of diet, regardless of what they are.

Yes!!! And everything is triggering. And misogynist. And LTB if he ever does the smallest thing to annoy you. You're also a CF if you do and a CF if you don't. Ha ha ha, I love this thread!

The 'On the beach' advert is really -great- annoying though. I absolutely love Christmas, and every time I hear it I think it's Christmas, and it's just February. It started last summer, and I thought it'd stop after Christmas.

Didn't double up my dashes 😥

All jobs can be done WFH if yours can’t you or your boss must be lying.
All MIL’s are batshit crazy witches who want to steal away your baby and pretend it’s theirs (when your grown child in question is your son). Same exact woman is a sainted loving and supportive angel (when your grown child in question is your daughter).
Any problems you have with your neighbours mean you should move house or buy penguin bollards.

All men are awful
And problems in relationships always their fault

If you sleep train you are the devil, if you breast feed you are smug. If you give your child an ipad at a Cafe you are a lazy parent

A big salad is all you need to eat in a whole day

If you don't get an invite to a wedding, call the bride and ask if it got lost in the mail 🤣🤣🤣