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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I don't have a middle name

235 replies

NotMyCircusNotMyProblem · 17/02/2023 18:54

Firstly, this is a bit light hearted and I've not lost any sleep over this, nor will I ever but, my parents didn't give me a middle name.

I have elder siblings who both have middle names.

As a child, I did question my mum as to why, but she just brushed it off saying, your name was lovely enough and you didn't need a middle name.

Im now in my 50s and I've never given it much thought until recently - why didn't I get a middle name? Were my parents that fed up with kids they couldn't be bothered to think of one? Did they not think I would feel the odd one out because I don't have one? I can't ask my parents now, they've both passed away.

Maybe middle names in the 60s were not such a big thing then... although all my peers and friends,,, everyone I know seem to have middle names.

So, do you have a middle name, how old are you and AIBU in feeling unloved at not having a middle name?

OP posts:
AuntyMabelandPippin · 17/02/2023 20:06

There are four of us, three girls and a boy. The only one with a middle name is male. When I asked my DF why he had one and we didn't, his answer was, 'It looks better on a cheque book signature...

I did ask him if he thought none of us would have a cheque book and he just shrugged.

MichaelFabricantWig · 17/02/2023 20:08

I have one, I’m nearly 50, I never ever use it.

I didn’t want to give them to my kids but my husband did so they have them.

User839516 · 17/02/2023 20:09

I used to think middle names were given when you were baptised and so people who were not baptised didn’t have middle names. So in theory you could tell who had a religious family and who didn’t. That’s apparently nonsense though 😂🙈

CrunchyCarrot · 17/02/2023 20:10

I do have a middle name (born in the 50s). My mother said she chose it as it went well with my first name. My DP doesn't have a middle name (born in the 60s).

RGinaPhalange · 17/02/2023 20:10

I’m the exact same OP. My brother and sister both have middle names but I don’t and I don’t know why but it bothers me.

Rainpigeon · 17/02/2023 20:11

Not only do I not have a middle name, my first name is a normal word and my surname is a job. I don't have any names!

Emmamoo89 · 17/02/2023 20:12

TheMadGardener · 17/02/2023 19:58

I think parents should give each DC the same number of names or it's a bit weird.

I have 2 middle names, so does my DSis. I quite like having 3 first names, it feels like I have choices! My late DH only had one middle name. I gave both my DDs three first names so they would have the same number as me.

My son has one middle name. If I have a daughter she'll be having 3. Not weird at all

MsMcGonagall · 17/02/2023 20:13

What's strange is your situation OP where some of your siblings have middle names and you don't. Why the change?

DH has exactly the same among his siblings - older siblings have middle names, younger ones don't. Running out of choices might be the reason?!!

Lwrenagain · 17/02/2023 20:14

I don't have a middle name and I was born late 80s.
But here's whats always confused me, up until I was born my mum named me Catherine, but changed it when she saw me. However, she didn't think to to keep Catherine as a middle name which is a shame because it suits my first name. I've made sure to give my children middle names because I always felt like my parents just couldn't be arsed doing it for me 😂

RedRiverShore3 · 17/02/2023 20:14

MoreSleepPleasee · 17/02/2023 20:06

I didn't realise you were supposed to put your middle name in your signature. I never have and don't put it on anything. Not even where it states to write 'full name'. I only put it if it specifically asks for 'middle name'.

It's the only time I was asked about it, the Registar was filling in the death certificate and it come to me signing and I had to say if my middle name was in my signature so I said no and I think it was just noted or a box ticked. Also with the probate that seems strict on the middle name being included in all paperwork, I forgot to mention mine and the solicitor had to add it onto everything later when I realised as my bank account, passport and birth certificate has it on, I felt a bit foolish.

Maray1967 · 17/02/2023 20:15

I was born in the 60s - no middle name, but neither has my sibling either. Our mum said she regretted not giving us one later on but at the time she thought they were pointless.

SatInMySpottyOnesie · 17/02/2023 20:15

🙋🏼‍♀️ Also a late 60’s kid with no middle name.
My christian name and surname total 18 letters, my parents thought my names were long enough … apparently 🥴

IJustHadToLookHavingReadTheBook · 17/02/2023 20:16

Neither of my in laws have middle names. I always wonder if that was the driving force in their romance. DH and his siblings do have them.

FatAgainItsLettuceTime · 17/02/2023 20:16

Me and my 3 brothers don't have them, my husband doesn't either and we haven't given DD a middle name.

I never really understand why anyone does unless it's passing down a name as family tradition.

My dad was the eldest son and the only one who got a middle name because there was a tradition of switching first and middle name for the eldest son of each generation so dad was (not the real names) Frank James Smith, his dad was James Frank Smith, his dad was Frank James Smith and so on.

Greydogs123 · 17/02/2023 20:16

My sibling and I don’t have middle names. My Dad didn’t agree with them! Tbh, it never bothered me because most people seem to dislike them and in school kids always took the Micky out of the really bad ones.
When I had a child I decided not to give them one either. I just don’t see the point!

Neighboursnumber1fan · 17/02/2023 20:20

80’s child. No middle name but both my brother do. My mum said that girls don’t need a middle name (?!) but I now have the same name (first and last) as my SIL. She has a middle name but it causes issues when we travel together (lots of family holidays) so I always have a separate booking!

RedRiverShore3 · 17/02/2023 20:20

My dad had three middle name like royalty have lots and it's a right mouthful, I'm sorting out the probate at the moment and have to type all these names or recite them over the phone.

Doje · 17/02/2023 20:22

Me and my siblings don't have one. Never feel like I've missed out tbh and l prefer it that way. It wasn't until secondary school that I worked out that I was the abnormal one and most people had them.

I didn't want the kids to have them either but I got overruled by DH (family tradition 🙄).

FirstnameSuesecondnamePerb · 17/02/2023 20:22

I was born late 60s. Almost every girl I knew had a middle name.
Jane
Ann
Louise
I think that was the only 3 available!

Alconleigh · 17/02/2023 20:26

I don't have one, nor does my sister. The reason being that my parents don't have them and never missed them! It felt v unusual when I was at school (I am 46 if that's relevant) but I have encountered a steady stream ever since. There's always a moment of bonding 😀

Alconleigh · 17/02/2023 20:27

I don't have kids but my sister does and has somewhat over compensated......

ScruffGin · 17/02/2023 20:28

My mum had no middle name, so gave me two! Hated them growing up, could never fit them both on forms etc, I'd have preferred none! 😂

tableanadchairs · 17/02/2023 20:31

Neither me or my sister have middle names. I have 3 DC’s with no middle name.
DH is called by his middle name and that has caused no end of problems.
middle names are over rated 😂

queenatom · 17/02/2023 20:32

Neither of my grandparents have middle names but all of their siblings do - my grandma is the middle of 3 and my grandad was 6 of 8, and their younger siblings were of the same sex as them so wasn't a only middle names for boys/girls thing.

BellePeppa · 17/02/2023 20:33

My middle name is my mother’s. I would have liked a name of my own especially as I loathe my first name so couldn’t even choose my middle name as an alternative.