To ask what it is about adulthood that didn’t meet your childhood expectations (lighthearted)

[TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl]

For me, from various sources such as parental threats, what I was taught in school and those scary public safety message videos, I did not expect:

• How difficult it ACTUALLY is to ‘have someone’s eye out’. You’d have thought doing something like running too fast would result in this but I’ve never met a person who only has one eye due to being whipped with a towel by their sibling
• Never once needed to recall Pythagoras theorem
• The distinct lack of stim king acirss quicksand and lack of opportunity to retrieve frisbees from pylons
• Not being smacked as a child has not resulted in me being a spoilt brat with no coping skills, as my mum was promised I’d be!

😂😂😂😂

That getting to choose what you have for dinner every single day isn't actually fun and an excuse to eat pizza each night. Its a mental drain, boring and cooking is a PITA.

Boys do in fact make passes at girls that wear glasses 🤓

I can remember thinking that when I was an adult, I couldn't wait to buy whatever I wanted when I wanted.

And we all know his that's turned out...

I had a gap between my baby teeth and was told that I was in line for a fortune. I can only assume that my adult teeth objected to the plan.

My eyes haven't gone square from watching too much TV.

That the knight on his white charger never turned up.

And my cottage with roses around the door has never materialised.

And even though I am very grown up I still have to count the pennies.

And my children never have time to call and see how I am. I always do the running and clearly always will.

But life is fabulous. I live where I want, work where I want to, spend my money just as I choose, can go to bed late, get up late if I want to, and can eat chocolate for dinner if I feel like it !!

@Lastqueenofscotland2 my dad s it was though. And is adamant it's because he ate his crusts. Asked him to explain why mine is poker straight. And I ate mine. He changed the subject 🤣

I can now confirm that two buses and a car arriving together at the car park of our local rural supermarket in no way resembles Piccadilly Circus.

Can’t answer the question as I’m still waiting for adulthood to happen after several decades

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Going out with wet hair has never given me a cold. And sitting on a cold floor had never given me a chill on my kidneys!

Ain't that the truth

I have been out without my coat many times and have avoided the inevitable outcome of a chill on my liver.

Not sure if anyone else’s mum did this.

But I’ve never had a cold and thought “Lemsip? Paracetamol? Screw that - I’m gonna peel an onion and put it on the sideboard” and have it actually work

I thought I'd regularly need to escape from quicksand/ run across rooftops/ use a sheet as a parachute/ ride on top of trains/ pick locks to escape and row in to shore under cover of darkness. My life is much safer more boring than I had expected!

Love this. 😂

Red wine turned out to be rather a let down. It doesn’t taste of Ribena as hoped. I’ve valiantly overcome the initial disappointment tho.

Me neither, although my sight isn't bad for my age. They help protect against macular degeneration though, so keep eating them :)

There is a lot more cleaning toilets and floors than I perhaps imagined.

I did get bit on my ass by a duck once though

I've checked, and despite leaving the lounge door open once, I wasn't in fact, born in a barn.

😂 😂 😂

All the tv shows lied to me, I cannot take long lunches, or spend hours on a coffee shop catching up with my friends everyday
or even hilarious neighbours

Oh yes, the distinct lack of adventurous sex. 😆 The men didn't read More magazine!

I thought if you worked hard and got a good education you’d get a good job and be successful in life.

Nope. Turns out employers hire their family, their mates, their mates mates, and anyone else who is basically capable of the job and seems like a good laugh. They don’t hire the most qualified applicant because they’re worried it’ll make them look bad if the person is better than them. They don’t hire anyone who’s too ambitious because the person might “be after their job” or might not stick around long term if they get a better offer.

Basically you need to avoid achieving highly and be sort of in the middle - capable but not a threat. And being fun to work with is way more important than being hard working and capable. Which is totally not what I was told adult life was like.

This. I thought I'd be George from the Famous Five. Instead I'm Anne. Every now and then I get sick of sending everyone else out to have adventures while I do the grown-up equivalent of tidying the tent and making beds out of heather. And I insist on going with them and am reminded of how much I hate mini-golf/soft play/bouldering.