To write a social media post about how proud I am of DD?

[MrsTickle123]

She was picked for the netball team and they won their tournament. I want her to know how proud I am of her and for her to feel special.

Sometimes it's not about the bragging. Though some do it a lot and I do find them annoying. But it comes up on your memories as well.

If you want to update people I'd probably share a picture of her winning with a short caption "super proud of DD and her team for winning X".

I wouldn't do a long post. Chances are she isn't on social media and won't see it so I don't see the point of pouring your heart into a post about her. I think writing her a card with those words in it would be lovely.

AIBU To write a social media post about how proud I am of DD?

Yes

As long as you don't post stuff like this on a weekly basis, I think it's fine to post a photo of her in her kit and a quick " Well done DD and the team for winning X competition today. Go girls!" I like to see this stuff on my social feeds - it's only annoying if you post every single achievement, which it sounds like you're not.

This

Tell her to her face, take her out for tea as a nice treat or put it on a family whatsapp message if you must and want her family to know. But this post and what you have said so far you were trying yo make your Dd’s achievements about you, so you also get the glory.

Kids can be cruel and if other kids see your post or her photo either now or in a year or two’s time she may get teased.

At 10 she shouldn’t even have social media. And I’m sorry but aside from maybe grandparents most people on your social media account really aren’t going to care about this or see it as a notable achievement. If you feel proud why not do something that’s meaningful to a 10 year old like take her on a day out, but a gift or get a special take away!

Hi Ive not read all the replies so may be repeating! my thoughts re posting her achievement is the message about getting validation from likes /comments etc. that your daughter may get. I'd avoid looking to Internet for validation. Celebrating with her giving her choice of what she'd like to do irl sounds better

How do you know OP's friends won't care? I quite like to see nice things about my friends' children periodically, especially as they get older.

I genuinely cannot see the problem as long as your daughter is OK about it! Absolutely nothing wrong with being a proud Mum 👏

I'd not parade my child on SM for anything. A two way sword - you can invite negative and positive comments on and off line.
Besides - what if she's dropped from the team? Don't go there.

Honestly, do what you like, but I think you need to focus on building your dd's low self esteem, rather than seeking validation from other people on social media.

She will not develop better self esteem as a result of what you do or don't put on Facebook. She also won't develop better self esteem as a result of you focusing too much on the fact that she got picked for the team or that they won. There is no value in teaching her that feeling good about herself is contingent on validation from others or external "achievements".

Instead, encourage her to take pride in the hard work and commitment that she put in, which helped her to get picked. Let her feel good about the fact that she turned up for practice regularly, or that she had the courage to try out for the team or whatever. Teach her to feel proud of the way that she worked with her teammates or showed resilience in the face of challenges, regardless of whether they won or lost. And show her that it isn't what other people feel about what she does that matters...it's about her knowing herself that she has done herself justice and given it her very best shot.

I don’t put these posts on social media. I tell my kids I am proud of them in these circumstances . I do read other people’s posts like these and it’s fine and I’m happy for them. However, posting this on social media will not boost her self esteem. At all. I think you’ve confused her feeling low and that making you feel low and that you are maybe responsible and then thinking this is a solution as it demonstrates you being proud.

Make a massive deal privately and tell family who love her too so they can text/speak to her. That will mark the biggest impact

Personally, i've always used FB posts just for myself so they come up in my memories in years to come (and my family who don't live local). I don't see the point in sharing it with the whole FB community, but that's just my view.

Just tell her. Can’t imagine in years to come she’ll be saying ‘my mum was so proud of my she put it on social media’ but she might remember the kind words and a hug.

What a weird world we live in.

Are you planning on posting it and then showing her the comments and likes? I am assuming since she is 10 she isn't on SM. I don't think using SM to build self esteem is a good message to be sending her. Make a big fuss of her in person, message the people who would genuinely care in person, invite close family round to celebrate her.

This.

I probably wouldn’t post on social media but take her out for a nice meal for making the team.

Will any of your fb friends care about your 10yo’s netball match? I wouldn’t. 🤷‍♀️. It is a bit cringy in all honesty. A friend of mine her ds was selected to represent GB and she didn’t even put that on facebook- now that wouldn’t have been cringy.

I know someone on fb and literally the only thing she has ever posted in the last ten years is stuff about her kid’s achievements. Literally every report, every parents evenings, every judo belt, gsce results, driving tests, uni offers. She does not post anything about herself. Do not be that person.

Do what pleases you, after all if you’re not harming anyone then I guess it’s not really a big deal?

personally, I think it’s a bit naff. Certainly tell DD how proud you are of her and celebrate with her and possibly include your family circle in the celebrations but I don’t think it’s necessary to post it all over Facebook.

Is she old enough for Facebook? If she’s not on it, she’s not going to see your post anyway but yeah I don’t see any point in posting it to SM.

That’s just me though. Everyone is different.

So she told you to put it on fb ! I very much doubt it. Don't be that parent it's cringeworthy. Tell your family no one else cares

I would, that's what social media is for, if people dont like it they scroll past

Why are you asking the general public? If you want to post about your kid then post?

When parents do this, like when they write gushy birthday messages, it comes across like it's entirely for their own vanity - nothing to do with the child and all about getting attention for themselves.

I find it very odd when people post things like this, just tell them! Treat her to a lunch / movie / make her fave dinner, whatever it is and show her how proud you are. A Fb post is naff.