What is going on with parenting these days?

[whocaresaboutbeingpopular]

Ok, so as my name change suggests I am aware this won’t be popular. My children are almost adults, youngest is 17 this year.

me and OH are away this weekend, we went to a place that to be fair we were aware would be full of kids; but we didn’t think that would matter as we don’t dislike having children around, however, since when did it become a thing to….

put your kids in front of a screen when they are having a meal? Not to mention having full volume of Peppa Fucking Pig?

let your kids shriek at high pitch continuously?

let your 18 month old walk themselves down the stairs despite a massive queue of people behind t? Ffs pick them up!

yes, no doubt I sound a right miserable bastard, but come on - is this how people are raising their kids these day? Bring on the entitled generation.

Parent of nightmare child 🚨 alert!!

@oakleaffy

Parent of nightmare child 🚨 alert!!

👋

blaring square of a mouth. 😂 This made me laugh!

Considering the topic has clearly touched a nerve with several posters, I think there's a few parents of nightmare kids on this thread.

@whocaresaboutbeingpopular 😂 sure your reaction said it all.

@oakleaffy perfect parent alert 🚨

Look you did exactly what I said some people do. Thank you for illustrating a point.

Yes my baby is terribly terribly bad. Defo got a problem child on my hands 😂

I have a 5 and 3 year old and agree some parents are very lazy in their parenting. We do allow tv and some time on tablets but only when they’ve read, played, done sport, long walk at weekend or long day of school and nursery.
However I don’t judge others out and I have been that parent before. Went to the pub on gorgeous Sunday afternoon. Kids played on the park in pub garden, did colouring, lots of chatting. Had tea, had a drink, more playing. We’d had a nice long walk in the morning. So yes at around 4 when DH and I wanted one more lovely drink we stuck Bluey on our phones and bloody well enjoyed the peace.
Thats not to say the behaviour you described is acceptable. Poor behaviour needs correcting. Ours have either headphones or incredibly low or no volume (they don’t seem bothered by it!)

Sounds like you should be kept under control in public

The parents I see out and about are lazy. If you can't get through a meal quietly with your own children without resorting to a screen, you need to do better

My 2 year old cannot sit through a meal quietly. She keeps trying to get up and run round, or pour the salt out, or otherwise do things she shouldn’t. We have never used a tablet, we simply don’t go out for meals at the moment and will wait till she’s older, because we don’t want to disturb people. I don’t think it’s fair to say we need to do better though, 2 year olds don’t like sitting quietly.

It does seem to be the done thing that any child 6mths plus is given a tablet to watch for god knows how many hours especially in restaurants. They don't seem to be taught any table manners, social skills or how to behave in a public place

How will she learn now to behave if she doesn't experience it? Surely if she's bought up to be told what she can and can't do she will know what's appropriate?

I wish tablets and phones were around when my kids were small. Damn right I would have used them to keep them quiet when I wanted a drink in the pub in peace.

OP the only logical thing is to blame the parents of those parents, for bringing up their children to be such shit parents. Is that what parenting was in those days??!!

hopefully your parenting will have raised better parents, should your children choose to have their own children.

I've noticed a similar phenomenon OP. DC is 8 now - impeccably behaved, of course - and I see ever such a lot of terrible parenting of toddlers.

I can't WAIT until DC is 17 and I'm sure I will see the same problem you do with parenting of primary age children.

Just think, in another 10 years you'll be able to see exactly how awful most teenagers are and why it's all their parents' fault.

It's great that your kids did that. But I can imagine someone like OP who obviously would not know about your day and see you at that moment of you two having a drink being judgy again. She would assume not only are your kids permanently glued to screens but also you and your husband are probably alcoholics!

The point is most people with kids are not even noticing people like OP as they got their hands full.

I agree op. I have never allowed my children to have screens whilst eating either at home or out in restaurants. I taught them to sit nicely and occupied them by playing with and talking to them.

How to sit nicely, eat tidily and behave appropriately in public is an important life lesson.

Endless screen time is lazy parenting.

Is that aimed at me? She’s only 2 if so! We sit down for meals at home, and we will take her out and teach her as she gets older. But at the moment it would just be stressful for us and disruptive for other diners as she isn’t a toddler who likes to sit!

There are a lot of people on here smugly accusing others of being lazy parents when they have never had to work hard at parenting themselves because they have easy NT kids. Some of you don't know you are born.

Get a babysitter if you want a drink in the pub in peace.

Are you judging all the adults who also sit staring at their screens in cafes and restaurants??

Sadly we have some relatives we eat out with who don’t want to engage with the children and with the best will in the world from me trying to engage them the other adults start conversations that the children can’t join in with. So it can depend who we are out with.

We do a range of things. We will sit and chat, we might play cards, we might use our screens. My kids have earphones so don’t make any noise from their screens. One is ND but wouldn’t dare show loud behaviour in public. No one would even know they’re ND. But if she is made to engage for too long she can become socially exhausted and then meltdown when we get home. We balance things. Sometimes the two children will start arguing easily. They are both more than capable of good manners at the table but depending on where we have been before and where we are going after we will do things differently. One rule we do have though is screen off when the food is being consumed.

I’m also a single parent and sometimes you run out of steam on the engaging front.

An ipad is the perfect baby sitter.

@celticprincess

Are you judging all the adults who also sit staring at their screens in cafes and restaurants??

Do you mean if they are sat there ignoring their children and staring at their phone - presumably you mean for a long time not a quick glance at a text - yes I absolutely am, adults are role models for children and if they can’t manage to sit without a screen, then why would their children be able to?

It is kind of hilarious reading this stuff about toddlers when all the teenagers I see out for meals with their parents are on their phones the whole time. Clearly that’s what parenting of teens is these days. I can only assume the OP parents their teenagers in the same way and they all sit on their phones for meals out, because all parenting of similarly aged children are the same.

I think there's a gap in the market near me for a pub which doesn't allow kids in under any circumstances. I may have to consider a career change. If I do, I'll let you all know where it is so you can come and eat & drink in peace with no fear of hearing shite kids TV/game music playing from an iPad or having toddlers repeatedly poke your dog in the face. (Did I also say it would be dog friendly?)

I hate dogs in pubs, so I'll pass on your pub, ta. I hate dogs slobbering all over the place. And pissing all over the pub gardens. Not to mention the barking and scrounging while you are trying to eat.

No I was meaning the adults ignoring each other on their phones. No children in tow. ----