Screaming baby on children's ward

[Tomblibooz]

I'm on the children's ward tonight staying with my little one (who's currently fast asleep). Across the hall is a baby, I'd estimate to be around 4mo, left by themselves and has been screaming/crying for over an hour. The sort of wailing that it's making itself choke. It's heartbreaking to hear, and so I went for a wander to see what was going on and to offer to help.

Only 2 nurses on tonight, so short staffed. Baby's mum has gone home to pick up some things. Baby is left alone screaming in a cot, and has been for the hour basically.

I offered to go in and try and calm little one, even just sitting shushing or singing lullabies, but was told they couldn't allow it.

Aibu in thinking you'd prefer your little one to be looked after by a random mum, than be left alone screaming for over an hour on it's own?

I appreciate my hormones are all over the place just now and I'm on about night 3 of no sleep, so I may bu!

Yabu - people leave their own baby's to cry it out, baby was safe so no drama

Yanbu - for baby and everyone else's sake

When my son was in NICU last year, I came in one morning and the parents who’s child was in a bed next to my son, told me that he’d been crying excessively the night before. The nurses were short staffed (even when they weren’t, they wouldn’t really comfort the babies. They’d just give them a dummy).

The parents picked my son up and comforted him until the nurse fed him. They told me as they said they hope they didn’t cross the line and hope I didn’t mind. I found it so sweet! Going forward, we’d all comfort each others kids if we had a good relationship with the parent and they weren’t there. We only did this in SCBU though as all the babies were in cots in that room.

It’s difficult to hear OP but what can you do?! I’d just go over there and comfort her. Surely she can’t be left to scream for even longer

This does exist - I do it at my local hospital. We are DBS checked and will sit in shifts and cuddle babies who don’t have anyone/mum is sick as well or has to leave for some other reason. We support with elderly patients as well.

Anything is better then a tiny baby left crying alone. While rocking/sushing/anything may not stop the crying being alone is really bad for babies.

There's no one to call any more.

That is the entire point.

There. Is. No. One.

They're understaffed and looking after many children/teens. An 'upset' baby isn't in danger, it's just distressing for all, and there isn't anything they can do about it without failing all the other children/teens also on the ward.

Exactly @amonsteronthehill !!
And people wonder why nurses are either striking or leaving the profession in their droves.
It’s absolutely heartbreaking what is happening to the NHS 😞.

Children's wards shouldn't ever be short staffed. It's heartbreaking to imagine babies being left crying 😢 my neice(premature ,downs baby with a heart problem)was unwell and was in hospital at a few weeks old ,her mum had to leave her for a few hours to go home, get showered,feed the pets etc...they hadnt even fed or changed my niece that whole time despite her needing 2 hourly tube feeds and having terrible nappy rash. The nurses assured her mum it was fine to go and they would look after her. ..imagine if you couldn't physically stay overnight with your baby if you had other children at home who needed you ? Heartbreaking situation to be in and I'm sure the other mum would have appreciated someone comforting her baby so yanbu at all

When I first started nursing you could leave your baby and a staff member would be able to sit with them and have a cuddle, usually a hca or a student would do it.
Now you've got no chance. Staffing is bare minimum and students aren't even treated as supernumerary anymore, they are propping up the crap staffing levels.
I feel so sorry for the mum and baby.

This is honestly one of the saddest posts I have ever read on here.

I work for the NHS but we are in a very sheltered little outpatient department, mercifully well staffed and despite all of the things on the news it wasn't until I read this thread that I realised how dire things are in other departments. It is heartbreaking to think of a baby crying for hours with nobody coming to comfort it.

The positive to come from it is that I will now contact my trust and offer to be a volunteer. Because if I can prevent this happening to another child I'd consider that a good outcome.

My baby is four months and this makes me feel so sad 😞 poor thing, and parents who don't realise it's so upset.

As an addition to my previous post about volunteering - I've just checked the trust website. They are currently accepting applications for volunteering (until Sunday) and have a role in the Children's Hospital - one of the duties is "physically comforting patients where appropriate".

This has happened before with my current job where it felt like I was in the right place at the right time. That's my weekend sorted, applying for that!

Yes please befriend the mum!!
I have had one child in hospital ( he's in more than he's out due to his medical condition) and two children at home also ill with the same illness. The children at home were crying down the phone they needed me. My husband works ( he can't take anymore time off due even though his work is very supportive of our situation). We pay child care when we can but it's 100 per day (and that's cheap becauseshe feels sympathy for our situation). We have no family support.
I have had to leave him to go to my other child, the nurses were awful and accused me I'd neglect saying he cried when i left. I was in bits and on my knees.

If we are quiet, we will do our best to send parents out for coffee, so we can have cuddles.

@Perfect28 What kind of work doesn't give you compassionate leave for your own extremely sick baby?

You realise parental leave to care for your extremely sick baby is unpaid? Your mortgage lender, council, energy company etc don’t give a shit if your baby is extremely sick. Those bills will just keep rolling in.

Fitting username 🙄

Yes. Same in every part of the NHS- wards, A&E, mental health, primary care. There is no one to call. This is what the majority of you voted for. Own it. It’s on you, not the HCPs.

All those jumping down my throat, suggesting I have no understanding of the world... Where would the baby be if not in hospital?

@Tomblibooz how is everyone now? Your baby, and the other one?

@Registeel your post made me well up all over again. I've had a look at my local trust but can't find any sort of similar roles being available. Once my little one is better I'll contact them and also my MP (not Tory) to highlight this situation going on, which definitely doesn't seem to be a one off.

@PollyPut thank you for asking, my little one is doing much better and was discharged this evening. It was a very tough night with my little one needing oxygen on/off through the night.. I was very glad of being there as the nurses weren't able to come very quickly when oxygen was needed, so they were able to show me how to do it myself.

The baby settled around 3am I think, it's all a bit of a blur. I never got a chance to see mum as they then had curtains closed etc. I don't know if it would've been good for mum to know anyway. I hope they all have a better night tonight.

Huge apologies, I totally misunderstood your post.

@Tomblibooz put my application in today. Fingers crossed!