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Original poster

To be surprised my health visitor asked this

222 replies

110APiccadilly · 08/02/2023 22:30

DD2 has just had her 6 month check. The health visitor went through a list of questions, mostly stuff I'd expect, but one was whether I was up to date on my smear test. I was surprised as I thought these appointments were about DD rather than me.

Apart from anything else, isn't it a bit sexist to assume they're going to see the mum rather than the dad? DH took DD1 to her 15 month check as he was her primary carer (I was the main earner) at that point. Bet he didn't get asked whether he'd had a prostrate exam recently.

OP posts:
WiIson · 09/02/2023 08:22

She's just checking on the mother's health and well being as the person who gave birth. That's a good thing.

plumduck · 09/02/2023 08:26

110APiccadilly · 08/02/2023 22:35

Well, it was on her list of questions, a printed sheet she went through. So whoever wrote the sheet clearly assumed she'd see the child's mother. Although presumably they wouldn't actually ask it of a father.

Show quote history

You're trying really hard to find an issue. It will be one set of questions and the HV will omit any that aren't relevant. I imagine anyone who looks like they might have a cervix will get asked that question.

plumduck · 09/02/2023 08:30

SecondtimeMama29 · 09/02/2023 07:08

I think it's amazing she asked you. You have no idea how many women have had cervical cancer and didn't realise because of no symptoms having usually missed a smear because of TTC, pregnancy or having a young baby.

You only need to listen to one of the latest made by mammas podcast episodes on parenting with cervical cancer.

She is fulfilling her duty of care. What a brilliant HV!

It's not really amazing. I'm assuming it's standard care these days. It's good it's included but it's not something special to be asked.

ClareBlue · 09/02/2023 08:31

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 08/02/2023 22:43

Well I’m she’d seen your DH and not you I doubt she’d be asking him about a smear.

This joint working happens everywhere, and is good practice. In my local authority at the when you register a baby’s name the registrar offers a firefighter to come for a smoke alarm as new parents are concerned about safety and you can get a free one as a new parent round here. I think it’s great! I have no idea in the world why anyone would be offended by being reminded about their smear.

And when we do housing assessments we give advice about cords to blinds if there are toddlers in the house. Not within the specific housing remit but working in public health it is general safety advise for families. If there are no blinds or children we don't. It's not hard to know when questions are relevant or not.

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 09/02/2023 08:34

ClareBlue · 09/02/2023 08:31

And when we do housing assessments we give advice about cords to blinds if there are toddlers in the house. Not within the specific housing remit but working in public health it is general safety advise for families. If there are no blinds or children we don't. It's not hard to know when questions are relevant or not.

Show quote history

Oh gosh I forgot about that! It’s been 10 years since I had a HV visit but I remember her saying about the risk and then going round tying them all up in a panic after her visit thinking “why didn’t I realise that”. My mum’s friend had a child die in those circumstances in the 80’s Sad

meloonhead · 09/02/2023 08:36

110APiccadilly · 08/02/2023 22:44

To be clear, I was surprised. Not offended.

I think it would be good if they were clearer about who the appointment is for. If it's for mum and baby, then say so. I was surprised because I thought it was just about DD.

You're not offended? You said it's sexistConfused

Mumto32022 · 09/02/2023 08:38

A health visitors role is public health. It will be a tick box they have to ask. The same for when a community midwife discharges you - they ask if you’re up to date on your smears. So no not a weird question to ask I don’t think. They’re usually qualified nurses / midwives who do extra training to become health visitors. They also advise on things like mastitis / breast infections / breast abscesses etc.

RealBecca · 09/02/2023 08:42

Are you upset because you dont want a smear test and feel put on the spot?

fairgame84 · 09/02/2023 08:53

Health visitors work on a family health model don't they?
It's only 10 years ago that they used to visit heart attack patients to offer health advice after discharge, I remember going on as a student nurse.

My health visitor has done a couple of extra visits since DD was born to specifically check on me as she was concerned about post natal depression as I was high risk for it.
She's also discussed post 19 options for DS18 who is in special school and told me who to contact for help.
They give advice on all sorts.

Scotty12 · 09/02/2023 09:09

But she was seeing you, not the baby’s dad. This is entirely normal.

Topi226 · 09/02/2023 09:12

I'm so confused by you being offended.
I have a 4 month old and HV seems to really care about my well being, as well as baby.
I think it's good they assume they will be seeing a mother, if the mother is struggling and may have pnd, then hv will notice that and help. It's important for mothers to be seen after giving birth and have on going support. If anything I don't think they support mothers enough.

As for the smear maybe they ask that question as for hormones changing during pregnancy? I could be completely wrong there but makes sense.

Nocaloriesinchocolate · 09/02/2023 09:24

Re “prostate” and “prostrate”, in the days when I had to talk to a lot of men about their health conditions it was staggering how many had lying down cancer!

Nocaloriesinchocolate · 09/02/2023 09:25

Cancer or other site specific problems

WandaWonder · 09/02/2023 09:29

I presumed my HV asked me questions about my health because I was one the one who had the baby

I could have stamped my foot at hand a tantrum about sexism but I presumed they asked them to help so answered and did what was advised

WeWereInParis · 09/02/2023 09:29

Are the checks for the mum as well? We have DD2's 9 month check in a couple of weeks and DH is taking her as I'm working. Should it be me?
(DD1's checks were all during covid so we didn't have them)

Paella2022 · 09/02/2023 09:29

Really silly post.
Well done to the HV for taking the opportunity for health promotion.
Women can’t have a smear during pregnancy, so this is a time when lots of women become overdue then may not remember postnatally.
There’s really nothing else to say about this!

yellowhedges · 09/02/2023 09:32

Pick your battles.
Honestly. You are making a mountain out of a molehill.
Offended...really

yellowhedges · 09/02/2023 09:33

GinIronic · 08/02/2023 22:52

Not her concern - I would refuse to answer.

It's an important question and you wouldn't answer
Ridiculous

Cosycover · 09/02/2023 09:34

Most woman would still be on mat leave at this point, so I don't see anything wrong with assuming the mother would be there.

Wish I had your problems tbh!

Snoopystick · 09/02/2023 09:40

What an idiotic post. Glad I had a smear after my DS, picked up dodgy cells.

DaveyJonesLocker · 09/02/2023 09:43

My HV absolutely checked on my general wellbeing. How's my c section scar, trouble breastfeeding, mental health and smear because sometimes because you're pregnant you miss one and having a newborn you're not always thinking about your own health.

Ilovechinese · 09/02/2023 09:43

Ha they ask everything! They ask if I'm on contraception too

trampoline123 · 09/02/2023 09:47

Christ!

It's not a bad thing to encourage someone doing so don't get why you're making an issue of it.

Health visitor checks are for mum and baby, not just baby.

CleaningOutMyCloset · 09/02/2023 09:57

HV are for Mum as well as baby, if you weren't there and the father was, I'm fairly sure they wouldn't have asked him about a smear. As for prostate exam, maybe they would have done. But as it's not him that's just been pregnant, I'm not sure it's relevant. Smears can be missed as they aren't done during pregnancy, so maybe it was just a helpful reminder. Think you're getting in a tizz unnecessarily

OhBitchPeas · 09/02/2023 09:59

HV's don't do 6 month checks.
They do 6 week checks.

And yes it's entirely normal for HV to ask as sometimes the smear test is offered during pregnancy when you can't have it done, then you're caught up in newborn stuff so it's a reminder, if you're due, don't forget to get it done.

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